Do you know your neighbors?

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

The media seem to be making a huge deal of how the VA Tech shooter's neighbors didn't know his family. I hate to say it, but we don't know any of our neighbors, either. A family moved in next door in 2005 and we STILL haven't met them - we don't even know their names! I keep meaning to go over there and introduce myself, but when I'm home I hang out in my jammies and don't appear what I consider presentable. Dumb, I know. They haven't approached us either, however.

It's not like it was in the small Kansas town I grew up in. There we didn't need to lock our front doors or car doors, and the neighbors were integral parts of our lives, almost family. It doesn't seem to be that way anymore. If anyone has a different experience, I'd love to hear about it!

[One_Life_To_Give]

1. Neighbors an Electrician

Thats what it says on the side of his Van.
New couple across the street has a car, a pickup and a dog.


Everyone seems to be trying to live in their own little private world. House, lawn and a thick stand of trees all around to screen out everything else.

[u4ic]

2. I know everyone in my apartment building

except one (my neighbours across the hall, who keep to themselves).

It's a very small building, and most have lived here 10+ years. It has a much different feel to it than anywhere else I've lived, where I'd have only known one, perhaps two people at the most in the building.

People seem to keep much more to themselves these days. Similar to you, I grew up in a neighbourhood (in a city, not a small town) where everyone knew one another.

A sense of community seems to be very rare now...

[LSK]

3. I talk to them maybe for 10 minutes about 3 times a year

[Starbucks Anarchist]

4. I know all seven of my neighbors to varying degrees.

Probably because we all occupy a few thousand square feet at most and bump into each other often, sometimes literally.

[Lil Missy]

5. Mine seem to get several "friends" visiting every day, to buy something in the trunk of his car.

Hmmm....

[Bullwinkle925]

32. Yes

Esther and Jose across the street. Mark next door. Frank across from Mark. Kristen & Mike next door. We know them - but we really don't socialize together. I kind of miss the good ole days of socializing, but I guess not enough to try to establish that here.

:shrug:

[ronnykmarshall]

6. yeah and he's SO hot.

Oh, you said KNOW your neighbors. Oppps, sorry.

[Midlodemocrat]

28. .

:rofl:

RKM, NOT in the Biblical sense.

[ronnykmarshall]

7. yeah and he's SO hot.

Oh, you said KNOW your neighbors. Oppps, sorry.

[Debi]

8. Yes, I taught him in religious ed many many years ago

And he works at the Country Club that we belong to right down the road. He gets our mail when we are on vacation and we invite each other to our outdoor parties. Also, we know the guy who rents the small house on the neighbor's property. I fostered kittens last summer after the renter's cat war hit by a car.

These are our only neighbors for 1/2 a mile north/south of us (except for people who live across 'the pond' -a wetland preserve - from us. Our boys are in the same grade in high school and we see each other at conference time).

We are not the best neighbors, don't bring over fresh baked cookies or shovel each other's walks. But we know to look for odd goings on at the other's properties and wave as we pass on the road/when we're outside.

[Phentex]

9. Yes I do. Many of them seem like extended family and

it's really nice.

[lukasahero]

10. Yup - on all sides we have at the very least met and conversed

And we have dinners and get togethers with the neighbors across the street and on one side. We get each other's mail when away, watch out for each other and celebrate the coming of spring when we all come out of hiding after winter.

The neighbors across the street are in their late 70's - early 80's. We help snow blow each other's driveways, take in packages for each other, chat whenever we see each other outside, and have had each other over for dinners and holiday parties.

On the side of us, we hired the daughter to walk our dog and went to her high school graduation party (I swear she lived comfortably for the first semester on the gift we gave her alone ;) ) They've made me chicken soup when I was sick and we've donated substantially to the MS Society due to her illness (not to mention taking on garden chores when she has a flair up and get can't out to the garden). We help each other move things. They have a key to our house and we have a key to their truck.

But you know, I'm just a Massachusett's liberal - what do I know about community? :eyes:

I remember one day last summer when I came home from a nightmare day at work to find 2 different plants on my front porch - one from each of these neighbors - just because they saw them and thought I'd like them. Sure made my work day disappear. :)

Neighbors and community are worth cultivating. When we were the new kids on the block, our neighbors took the opportunity to introduce themselves to us and we have taken up the call when newer folks move in. It made us feel welcome and we feel it's important to pass that on.

[MorningGlow]

11. Sort of

We live in a VERY, VERY social small town--many of the folks have known each other all their lives (and it's a kick to see a 50-something guy roll his eyes at the mention of a town official he knew in kindergarten, when his primary activity was picking his nose). We just moved here about a year and a half ago, give or take. The folks across the street have been friendly, as have the folks nextdoor, but they don't go out of their way to chat and we've never been invited into their houses. To be fair, we haven't invited them over either, mainly out of total embarrassment, as the ol' Money Pit is still ripped up and "in transition".

The skeevy guy on the other side of us...well, let's say he saw DH's long hair, presumed what everyone presumes, and tried to be friendly, but didn't get very far. DH's long hair belies his drug-free Republican lifestyle (I know, I know...)--and he has very little patience for said skeev who may or may not have a meth lab in his basement (seems to make an awful lot of very brief trips in his car, especially on weekend nights--I'm just sayin'...)

[LaraMN]

12. Not yet, but we just moved recently.

I like to get to know my neighbors; one of my former neighbors from our last location has become one of my closest friends!

[crispini]

13. Yes, that is exactly why I live in the neighborhood I do.

I know ALL of my immediate neighbors, and I also know half of the neighborhood. The guy on my right used to be the head of the neighborhood association and is Uncle Sam in the neighborhood Fourth of July parade every year. The guy across from me is a grad student and mandolin player. The guy to my left is a big ol' redneck, but goodhearted. Our neighborhood supports a yoga studio and a drum circle. We have a home and garden tour every year. In fact, my neighborhood is so damn cool and full of community activism and spirit, one of the "kids" of the neighborhood actually made a documentary about this whole topic of "knowing your neighbors."

http://www.subdivided.net/

It's screening on Sunday -- you should come on out. :) I won't be able to make it 'cause I'm going out of town (neighbor will be feeding the cat, haha) but it should be a lot of fun.

I'm telling ya, in the metroplex area, for the cool creative type, Irving is most definitely NOT where it's at. ;) It took me awhile to find this place, but now that I've found it, I'm home.

[bigwillq]

14. We know all of ours.

We live on a dead-end street with only about 12 houses or so. Many have been here for years. We know them all personally.

[grace0418]

15. I know my neighbors from condo board meetings. We say hello in the hall

and chat outside when we bump into one another but we're not super close or anything. I'm pretty confident that none of them will be blowing away 32 people any time soon, but I suppose you never know when someone might crack.

There is a guy that goes to my gym that gives me the creeps. He likes to stare at you as you walk by, and has a very menacing quality about him. Usually I'm there with my husband so it's no big deal but one time I was there by myself and he stood at his car and watched me walk all the way across the parking lot, get into my car, and watched me drive away. He had no facial expression, never moved, didn't get into his own car (at least not until after I left), just watched me. :scared:

[Kerrytravelers]

16. Nope. Not a one.

My building is three stories and has about 150 apartments.

[Nicole]

17. Yes

I know my next door neighbors on both sides really well. We sit on our porches & visit during the warmer months. We often have cook outs together. We water each other's plants & gather the newspapers during vacations. I know the ones across the street, two different houses, well enough to call them by name.

I have found that gardening is one of the best ways to get to know the neighbors. They will stop by to talk when I'm out pulling weeds or watering. Or if they see me sitting on my porch, they often stop to comment on my flowers.

[youthere]

18. Well I know them but I don't know them well...

We live in a small rural community and my closest neighbors are 3/4 mile down the road. We always honk and wave when we drive by each other's houses, and if we bump into each other "in town" we'll stop and chat for a few minutes. Once in awhile if one of us is working out in the yard and we happen to drive by we might pull in the drive for a few minutes and exchange niceties. We're on friendly terms with all the folks up and down the road but we don't spend a lot of time with each other. I know I could depend on my neighbors if I needed help for something though. When we got hit in February with that bad ice storm and lost power for several days, all of us were checking on each other and making sure no one needed anything.

[qanda]

19. Yes, we know our neighbors

On both sides and up and down the street and even on the next block over. My husband is very friendly and makes sure that as know all the people in the neighborhood.

[BarenakedLady]

20. most of them

But really only because of the kids. It's pretty rural out here, but I have met almost all of them.

[raccoon]

21. I live in an apartment complex and know nearby neighbors by sight,

and sometimes we say hi but that's it.

Is that just an apartment thing? Seems to me in apartment complexes, some people won't even say hi, hello, kiss my foot, whatever. My take on it is that maybe they're afraid you'll ask them for a favor.

Anybody else had a similar experience?

[JVS]

22. no

[Arkansas Granny]

23. I have spoken briefly to my next door neighbors a few times, but

I don't know their names. We do wave at each other when we see each other. I have never spoken to the neighbors across the street. It's a two story duplex and people move in and out quite often. My dog is friends with the dog down the street and likes to visit through the fence when we go for a walk, but I have never met his owners. I don't have many neighbors as the area where I live has been zoned commercial and households are being replaced by businesses.

When I still had kids at home I knew every neighbor for 3 or 4 blocks around the house we lived in then.

[alarimer]

24. No and that's how I prefer it

The ones upstairs are assholes. They play their fucking music too loud; they are breaking the rules by having more than two people living in a one-bedroom apartment and they have the nerve to call the cops on me when I am too loud, when they are constantly banging on the floor. I hate having neighbors. I prefer to keep to myself.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

25. no, i avoid mine. mostly cos they are homophobic and stare at lisa and me

as though we belong to another planet.

[hippywife]

26. Not many of them.

We live out in the boons and all the houses are almost a quarter of a mile apart. We know the folks directly across the road a little and the one guy down the road who owns a HVAC company and installed our heat and air. We've also met the guy who works for the landowner of the cow pasture next to us. Other than that, everyone waves when they pass by but no one hangs out with each other.

[femmocrat]

27. No... that is why we moved to the county. No close neighbors.

If I saw any of the locals at the store, I wouldn't recognize any of them. I have never seen them up close! LOL

[Nickster]

29. Yeah actually. Spend quite a bit of time bbq and drinking with them during the

summer months.

I came from a bit of a tougher neighborhood before that so it took me awhile to warm up to them, but they turned out ok. The first xmas one of them came to my front door with xmas cookies and they said I opened the front door like they had a gun.

[Midlodemocrat]

30. Yes. Everyone on my street knows each other.

We have pulled together a lot over the last few years, folks losing their parents, my next door neighbor's son had non-Hodgkin's, my own family had a health scare.

Good, good people live here.

[Broken_Hero]

31. Yep...sure do...

my closest neighbor is a construction contractor, our next neighbor works for the school system, and further down the road, is an elderly couple who is retired...I know all of our neighbors down my road.

I came to know them because of a huge garage sale we had when we first moved in, and I walk our dirt road five days a week, and the neighbors introduced themselves...and our big ice storm in mid january....we got to know them all a bit better...

[GoneOffShore]

33. Yes, more than a few.

Our neighborhood is fairly tight knit.

I know the guy directly behind my house, and the other guy who's renovating. Michael across the street, and the couple with the golden retriever on the corner. The nurse across the other street, and her neighbors two doors down. The people on Town Watch on the other corner. My next door neighbor and the guy next to him, plus his tenant. The Termite family up the street and the bicyclist guy who moved in last year. Plus the folks two streets over, the other bicyclist, and the crazy Ukranians who used to live next door when we lived three streets over. Probably about 10 or 12 other folks within a three block radius.

[mvd]

34. Yes

But really only on an acquaintance level. We would help each other if we need it, but we don't excactly have get-togethers.

[ganeshji]

35. No.

I avoid them as much as possible. They are young men with a shitty attitude and a Great Dane that poops in my yard. Definitely not my favorite people.