Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

Does Your Spouse or S.O. Have Full Access To Your Cell Phone?...

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU
 
The Great Escape Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 03:43 AM
Original message
Does Your Spouse or S.O. Have Full Access To Your Cell Phone?...
I sometimes get calls on my cell phone from wives wondering who is calling their husbands. When they realize it is job related, I always get a profuse apology. I don't really need the apology. I guess, I just find it strange. Do these guys have to submit their cell phones for inspection? I have never had this happen when I have called an employee on their landline phone?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
Deep13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:11 AM
Response to Original message
1. I never use the damn things.
Electronic leashes suck.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
unpossibles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:16 AM
Response to Reply #1
4. I felt the same way at first
then realized since I never use the phone and have family out of state, it's actually cheaper for me. I also don't answer the damn thing a lot of the time and it only rings once - just because I have a phone on me does not mean I am a slave to it, but it has saved me a couple of times too (broken down car, getting lost, etc.). I'm not a phone person though and was the same way with my landline. If I don't want to talk on the phone, I won't answer it.

I hate when people are rude to people with them though. If I am hanging out with someone, and they are on their phone the whole time, it's quite rude.

I look at my cell as portable voicemail mostly.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
unpossibles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:19 AM
Response to Reply #4
8. oops.
Edited on Fri Mar-02-07 09:19 AM by unpossibles
oops. meant for the OP
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:13 AM
Response to Original message
2. i suppose she does. i dont hide it or anything.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
BarenakedLady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:16 AM
Response to Original message
3. Well sort of
He's been know to use mine when he's forgotten to recharge his. I don't particularly like it (long story re: breech of privacy) but neither do I have anything to hide on my phone.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Courtesy Flush Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:17 AM
Response to Original message
5. My wife knows all
Fortunately, I can be trusted, and she knows it. She finds women's phone numbers on scraps of paper all the time :) I'm a caseworker, and most of my clients are women, so I'm always writing down addresses and phone numbers of people I need to call. Thank god she's secure enough to know it's just my job.

She once got a call from a guy whose wife had found HER name and phone number, and demanded answers. He had spoken with her about renting an apartment from us, and later forgot about it. Wife found the number, and he was on the hot seat.

I love having a confident wife!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:17 AM
Response to Original message
6. My SO *could* check out my cell phone if he wanted to (and vice versa) but why?
I don't care if women call him. He doesn't care if men call me.

I'd think it offensive if he went out of his way to hide his phone from me (which would be impossible anyway because we have online itemized billing), but I'd also think it offensive if he scrupulously checked my history. (Our phones are identical, though, so some occasional flipping through the phone until one of us realizes we have the wrong one is fine...but no, "honey, who is 414-555-0000 and why is he calling you?...")
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
latebloomer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:18 AM
Response to Original message
7. Many women need to discover their true calling
Which is being a private detective.

Can't tell you how many I have spoken to who frequently monitor their SO's cell phone messages, bills, and have figured out their passwords. They also analyze their man's comings and goings, and any explanations he might have of his activities, with a microscope.

I also know of more than a few controlling men who do the same.

In the case of the women, and some of the men, I must say that frequently they do it because they feel suspicious that the partner may be screwing around, and often they are proven correct.

Years ago I has a bf who cheated on me. I felt something was wrong, so I started searching his wallet, bag, etc., and i did find evidence.

When I met my husband, I would also search his stuff, out of a habit of distrust. I stopped doing so when I repeatedly found nothing, and I began to realize he was a faithful type of guy.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
mongo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 01:44 PM
Response to Reply #7
26. I can't imagine living like that
I have nothing to hide from either of my SO's.

I don't check their phones, don't read their journals (unless they want me to), and they don't check up on me.

I grab my wife's phone to call the weather in the morning because it's programmed into her phone, she will grab mine if there is a number in it she needs.

She pays the bill and see's all the calls I make, I imagine.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
unpossibles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:20 AM
Response to Original message
9. my wife and I trust each other
I think that is more of a case of überjealousy to me, and has little to do with the method of snooping. Our phones are often just sitting around, but we don't go through them with a finetooth comb looking for an excuse to be silly. If she calls someone, that's her business, and vice versa. Also, I don't mind if she answers my phone and vice versa because we don't hide crap from each other.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:22 AM
Response to Original message
10. Bunch of low-esteem control-freak bitches.
Hubbies should drop them like a hot potato.

I would not tolerate that for one second.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
BarenakedLady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:35 AM
Response to Reply #10
12. It can go the other way too
I wouldn't immediately assume that mainly women do this...believe me I found that out the hard way.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 10:04 AM
Response to Reply #12
15. I never made that assumption.
The OP mentioned that it's been women calling - it is to those women I was referring.

You are right, though - there are plenty of control-freak asshole men who would do the very same thing.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:33 AM
Response to Original message
11. both of us somtimes end up with the other's cell phone
however my husband is a poor secretary and takes awful messages...so when he accidentally takes mine...he turns it off

I however will answer his (for business) and will direct them to his work number.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
emmajane67 Donating Member (401 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 09:51 AM
Response to Original message
13. Or, there's the annoying try one member of the couple...
can't get through, call the other one!

"Uh, I'm at the shop, if you want to speak with him, maybe you should try HIS phone."

Normally it's fine but it can get pretty funny.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 10:02 AM
Response to Original message
14. No way
My phone is MINE for a reason and his is his.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
av8rdave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 10:07 AM
Response to Original message
16. I'd never given it much thought...I suppose she could check it out if she were so inclined
we borrow each other's cell phones all the time. It's never occurred to me to be prying into her calls.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 11:27 AM
Response to Reply #16
18. I've never given it a thought either.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 10:19 AM
Response to Original message
17. Our daughter is master of our cell phones
We have no freaking idea what is happening with either of our phones...our 11 year old has all of our settings personalized for her tastes.

I couldn't determine anything from my husband's cell phone if I wanted to and he's more clueless than I am.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 11:32 AM
Response to Original message
19. Yeah, it's never been an issue tho...
The bill comes in once a month with all of the numbers in and out on it. We both look at it.

I have nothing to hide.


Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
auntAgonist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 11:38 AM
Response to Original message
20. yes .
He answers mine, I answer his. I look after the monthly bill and it's detailed. Neither of us has anything to hide.

aA
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 11:40 AM
Response to Original message
21. Our cellphones are interchangeable. I use which ever one is closest.
I trust my husband until I have a reason not to.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
montanto Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 11:54 AM
Response to Reply #21
22. our phones are the same, so, its like, "is this
mine? oh well, i don't know, whatever."
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Crazy Dave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 11:59 AM
Response to Original message
23. My wife used to have those type of insecurites....
...till I told her we could always get a divorce and then she wouldn't have to worry about stupid things like that.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
ileus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 12:43 PM
Response to Original message
24. Only when I had something to hide did I have reason...
to keep the wife away from my cell. Now however, we trade phones often because her's will be charged and mine dead and I have to carry while on call.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 12:59 PM
Response to Original message
25. Wow, how bizarre
We each have our own cell phone as well as our own computers. However, if I needed a phone and mine wasn't handy, I'd grab his and vice versa. Same with computers.

What I wouldn't do is scroll through all his calls or emails to see what he'd been up to. If I distrusted him that much, I wouldn't be here.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
WindRavenX Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 03:00 PM
Response to Reply #25
28. same here
NT
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
hunter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 02:59 PM
Response to Original message
27. You could be really evil when this happens...
...you could inhale sharply, feigning shock and surprise, and then hang up. Or you could tell some very obvious lie with lots of ums... and ahs... and other awkward pauses.

:evilgrin:

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
alarimer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-02-07 03:12 PM
Response to Original message
29. If I had an SO, I wouldn't be worried about it
My cell phone is an open book, so to speak. Most of the names in it are male actually (I am female). They are guys I work with (and I mostly work with guys) so if my SO had problems with that, he would have problems with my job. And that is a deal-breaker. My coworkers call each other occasionally for work-related matters, usually, but sometimes we do each other favors (rides to work, etc). No big deal.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Wed May 01st 2024, 03:54 AM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators


Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC