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I feel very adult. First time in my life i have sent out Thank You cards.

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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-05-07 10:48 AM
Original message
I feel very adult. First time in my life i have sent out Thank You cards.
ask me anything...

also tell me what makes you feel like an adult
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miss_american_pie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-05-07 10:52 AM
Response to Original message
1. Who are you thanking
and for what?
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-05-07 11:40 AM
Response to Reply #1
3. my gf's parents for christmas gifts
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ThomCat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-05-07 10:54 AM
Response to Original message
2. When everything goes wrong, and I have to handle it alone
I feel very much like an adult. But I don't know if that's what you meant. :shrug:
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-05-07 12:37 PM
Response to Original message
4. ???
I wrote my first thank you card when I was FIVE!
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-05-07 12:43 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. different cultures
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 05:26 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
GalleryGod Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 08:29 AM
Response to Reply #7
9. Very well put, Skittles. The earlier the better.
At age 7, after my First Communion celebration, I found out all about Thank You cards.O8)

So...one could say I've been sending them out for 50 years, now.:patriot:
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GalleryGod Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 08:32 AM
Response to Reply #9
10. Oh, what makes one feel like an adult? Paying a Mortgage Payment.
:loveya: :patriot: :applause:
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 09:19 AM
Response to Reply #10
13. Miss a mortgage payment and you'll get treated like an adult
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 12:39 PM
Response to Reply #10
22. Agreed!
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 09:16 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. I learned early because I was a military dependent
so I sent thank you cards to relatives over the years who sent me anything....you are correct; it is rude not to send a thank you card and it can - and should - be taught very early.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 11:32 AM
Response to Reply #9
17. actually its kind of rudely put. which is funny when accusing someone else of being impolite
i grew up in india. card sending is not in our culture.

:eyes:
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MountainLaurel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 11:52 AM
Response to Reply #17
20. Don't worry about it
Thank you notes weren't part of my culture either, and I'm a native-born American, except for maybe wedding and baby gifts. It just wasn't done.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 11:56 AM
Response to Reply #20
21. thank you. ofcourse you were TERRIBLY IMPOLITE HORRIBLE PERSON
etc :sarcasm:

:hi:
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MountainLaurel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 06:21 PM
Response to Reply #21
78. Yep, yep
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 06:24 PM by MountainLaurel
But apparently my entire community was horribly impolite too, 'cause nobody else did it. Maybe the Presbyterians in the city did it, but they always were uppity.

Funny you should mention this though, because I posted a question in the Lounge around MithrasDay on this very topic.

:toast:
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 06:37 PM
Response to Reply #78
80. damn community full of rude people!!! ugh!
:hi:
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 09:17 AM
Response to Reply #7
12. argh, SORRY; left my glasses at work and am struggling
:)
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 11:21 AM
Response to Reply #7
16. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 08:18 AM
Response to Reply #4
8. Me too -- my mom was very strict about that
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 09:20 AM
Response to Reply #8
14. good for your mom
it is rude for anyone who can WRITE to not send a thank you card if one is warranted
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:33 PM
Response to Reply #8
34. Mine, too
I realized how well-trained we were about this, when my brother called yesterday to apologize for not having sent thank-yous yet. He assured me it would be done soon, and I told him the call would suffice.

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Bum Whisperer Donating Member (97 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Jan-05-07 12:45 PM
Response to Original message
6. I bought a couple of pairs of Dockers last week.
I feel so middle aged now.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:28 PM
Response to Reply #6
33. lol,
best response on this thread.
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 09:21 AM
Response to Original message
15. A Colonoscopy
Brett Favre, at 37, being referred to as "Grandpa."

Always keep a box of thank you cards handy and use them. Don't rely on E-mail thank you's. there is no substitute for the real thing.
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 11:34 AM
Response to Original message
18. hoo boy
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 11:36 AM by pitohui
i think i don't even want to know why the first time you have sent out thank you cards is as an adult! tee hee, i have just read the thread and i see in india that people phone or visit instead, but in the usa south you gotta send that card or at least back then you did

one of my earliest memories is being taught how to send out a thank you card, i think i was 5!

it seems we're all going to email now tho, aren't we?
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 11:38 AM
Response to Reply #18
19. its perfectly ok to ask me why..and i would tell you different cultures.
its not ok to imply that i have been rude all my life. my relatives will laugh at you. they think i am the politest person ever.

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I Have A Dream Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 01:06 PM
Response to Original message
23. It's weird that this has degenerated into attacking you on your past...
history of not sending thank you notes. This wasn't the question that you asked.

What makes me feel like an adult is not being rude to people who do not live by the same rules as I do. As long as someone's not hurting someone, it's none of my business.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 01:26 PM
Response to Reply #23
25. thank you. its weird this was supposed to be about silly little things that make you feel adult
the fact that i sent thank you notes to my gf's parents weirdly makes me feel adult. like from a tv show when the wife sends out notes to her inlaws. that was all i was thinking about while i was doing it.

also i really am from a different non card giving culture. we call to thank or go over to peoples homes to thank them etc.
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 01:23 PM
Response to Original message
24. How long have you lived in the U.S.?
I'm curious because this practice is one that isn't observed equally within the U.S. It is a formal courtesy that many Americans bypass for all sorts of reasons. It's very much a WASP and Southern practice to write thank you notes as opposed to expressing gratitude verbally. I was raised to thank everyone for kindnesses great and small but only wrote thank you notes to people who couldn't be thanked in person. There are a few occasions such as weddings where most Americans understand that a written thank you is expected. Most also understand that professional job applicants gain an edge by sending thank you notes too.

As to what makes me feel like an adult, just about everything, but then I've been one for a long time. ;)
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 01:28 PM
Response to Reply #24
26. 10 years in the north east (nyc) but this is the first time a thank you note has been appropriate
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 01:31 PM by lionesspriyanka
i dont want to call my gf's parents to thank them (it would be so awkward and strange) but i dont also want to ignore it.

i cant think of a single other time a thank you card would have been appropriate (at graduation all the gift i received were from my family, who would all think i have finally lost my sanity, if i sent them thank you cards)
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 01:47 PM
Response to Reply #26
27. Nah, just tell them you're an Amurkan now and that's the way it's done here.
They'd still probably think that you've lost your sanity.;)
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 01:50 PM
Response to Reply #27
28. lol. they will think i hate them ...why else would i not just pick up the phone and talk to them?
some people are so judgemental makes me wonder how unpleasant their own lives must be.

:hi:
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:05 PM
Response to Reply #24
31. I grew up in NJ, and my family are Sicilian and Irish American
Some barely off the boat, and we were raised to write thank you notes. And, believe me Gormy, we were far from wealthy.
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:51 PM
Response to Reply #31
70. I didn't say it was only the wealthy, or Southern for that matter.
I just have noticed that it's far more common with WASPs (many who aren't wealthy) and Southerners.
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Karenca Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:11 PM
Response to Reply #24
32. I was raised in the Bronx, New York City
we were not WASPS -- My family was Jewish, not rich at all--my father was a taxi driver.

Writing Thank-you notes ws something we were taught to do as children.
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:57 PM
Response to Reply #32
73. See my other replies.
I didn't state that nonWASPs, or people who weren't wealthy didn't practice this, only that in my experience it was more common among WASPs and Southerners. Your experience may be different.

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HarukaTheTrophyWife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:40 PM
Response to Reply #24
66. I grew up lower-middle class, Irish Catholic in northern NJ. Totally not Southern or WASPY.
We had to write thank-you notes as soon as we could write.
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:54 PM
Response to Reply #66
71. LOL.
I didn't write that ONLY WASPs or Southerners did this, but people are reading my post that way. At least it's taking the heat off the lioness.
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Shell Beau Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 01:58 PM
Response to Original message
29. I have always hated writing Thank you notes.
Especially when I got married. It seemed like I would never get finished. But it is the appropriate thing to do. I would much rather thank them to their face.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 02:05 PM
Response to Reply #29
30. yeah i supposed if i ever got married...i would have to send thank you notes to the americans
at the wedding. and call the indians.
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Courtesy Flush Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:35 PM
Response to Original message
35. Retirement would make me feel grown up
Just a few years away... then I can be a kid again :)
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:37 PM
Response to Reply #35
36. you know for a couple of years i supported one of my parents
but that did not make me feel so adult as the damn thank you cards.
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:37 PM
Response to Original message
37. I was raised to sent thank you notes from the time I was very small
And we're not from the South (well, my mom was from Ky, but we lived in the upper Midwest), and were pretty much right in the middle of middle class.

I remember asking my mom if I had to send a note to my great aunt for a comb and mirror set I really wasn't all that thankful for. The answer--an emphatic YES!!
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:39 PM
Response to Reply #37
38. umm ok. i wasnt. i didnt grow up here. we have different politeness standards
most people i need to thank are also not american. this is why this is a first for me.

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Courtesy Flush Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:45 PM
Response to Reply #38
39. It's not pointless at all
When people go out of their way to be nice to you, what's pointless about a simple thank you? But then, I'm a Southerner.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #39
40. i didnt say it was pointless
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 03:47 PM by lionesspriyanka
where are you getting that from?
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Courtesy Flush Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 05:02 PM
Response to Reply #40
75. Oh POLITENESS! My mistake. LOL
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 05:03 PM
Response to Reply #75
76. tis ok. i am polite. i just am NOT american.
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LostinVA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #39
41. I grew up in New Jersey, and agree
My mom raised us to do that, although I told my sister a call or email is sufficient.
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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:55 PM
Response to Original message
42. I feel like an adult when I read all the posts in a thread
so that I understand the entire picture, rather than post a knee-jerk reaction to what I assume from the OP.

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BarenakedLady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:56 PM
Response to Reply #42
43. Me too.
:thumbsup: :hi:
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 03:58 PM
Response to Reply #42
44. lol. thanks.
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 03:59 PM by lionesspriyanka
dont you know i have been rude for almost 28 years now?

its also quite possible that my culture is rude.

i find it ironic how rude and insulting people are when they are judging me for being rude.

so holier than thou while being completely zenophobic
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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:19 PM
Response to Reply #44
51. I guess INS didn't tell you
From the moment you first set foot on American Soil, your native culture became crap. If you're going to live here, you must spit on all non-American customs — because if it ain't American, it's just wrong.

:hug:


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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:21 PM
Response to Reply #51
53. i think part of the reason i havent had to write cards either..is that this is the first
time i have been gifted by an actual american. which made me think i should be culturally sensitive and write a thank you note.

apparantly not everyone cares about cultural sensitivity.

jeez you would think i had just spit on someone.
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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:30 PM
Response to Reply #53
58. Not just someone
You spit on the flag!

:spank:

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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:42 PM
Response to Reply #58
68. or maybe my mother spit on it for not teaching me to write thank you cards soon as i was born
yeah..its all my mothers fault... :P
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:03 PM
Response to Original message
45. What were the thank yous for?
:shrug:

What makes me feel like an adult?

The little gray hairs i've been finding. :(
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:04 PM
Response to Reply #45
46. to my gf's parents and her sister for christmas gifts
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:12 PM
Response to Reply #46
49. Did you enjoy
the whole writing process?
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:15 PM
Response to Reply #49
50. umm...i felt odd.. like someone from a tv show..dont ask why...
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 04:17 PM by lionesspriyanka
i think i never grew up around the idea of thank you cards and the only people i have seen write them are people on tv...

on edit: i have written thank you notes to professors/bosses etc. but i mean thank you notes for personal reasons.
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:21 PM
Response to Reply #50
52. I started writing thank yous
when I was a little boy. 7 or 8 years old is the earliest that I remember.
I think my first communion was the first time I wrote them. Of course, my mom made me..but as I grew up I just thought it was common courtesy to write them and expect someone to write one to me if I had given them anything for b-days, xmas, etc....

just the way I was brought up. :)
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:22 PM
Response to Reply #52
54. yeah but as i keep explaining a thousand times on this thread. not everone is american
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 04:23 PM by lionesspriyanka
thank you cards are culture specific.

i am not american, i was just being culturally sensitive to lisa's parents.
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:38 PM
Response to Reply #54
64. Well that is true.
But you know how some people are here :eyes:


I am sure Lisa's parents appreciated the note.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:39 PM
Response to Reply #64
65. thank i hope they did.
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Cheney Killed Bambi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:06 PM
Response to Original message
47. Ha
I was forced practically at gunpoint to write thank you letters from the time I was 6 years old. Now, as an adult, I try to get by with thank-you emails whenever possible.
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:06 PM
Response to Reply #47
48. thats funny.
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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:26 PM
Response to Original message
55. I've never written a thank you note.
:D
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:28 PM
Response to Reply #55
56. you rude bastard. didnt your mother teach you this soon as you popped out of her
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 04:28 PM by lionesspriyanka
wasnt she very strict about it?

dont you know any better.

so what if you are indian... your culture doesnt believe in politeness?>


:sarcasm:
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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:30 PM
Response to Reply #56
57. BWAHAHAHHA!
:hi:

Ironically, I was the first person in my family born here, so I had the opposite experience of you.

Of course, my parents also put up a Christmas tree every year -- I guess they're fake Hindus. ;)
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:31 PM
Response to Reply #57
59. mine put up christmas trees too...
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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:32 PM
Response to Reply #59
60. We Indians are truly shameless.
:rofl:
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:34 PM
Response to Reply #60
61. and rudeness is inherent to our culture because we dont send out thank you cards
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 04:35 PM by lionesspriyanka
we are so bad. maybe we will all go to hell. all one billion of us.

:P

ofcourse we will also go to hell for stealing american jobs.
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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:35 PM
Response to Reply #61
62. Hell will need to build a few additional wings for us.
But the fires will make cooking curry much faster. :P
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:36 PM
Response to Reply #62
63. maybe as torture all indians in hell with have to send out thank you cards to the devil
for giving us a warm toasty place to cook curry in

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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:40 PM
Response to Reply #63
67. HA!
:rofl:

And the heat won't be a problem because we're used to it. :P
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:43 PM
Response to Reply #67
69. this is true. so it will be like india. except with thank you cards
:p
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querelle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:55 PM
Response to Original message
72. I'm French
Edited on Sat Jan-06-07 04:56 PM by querelle
We never send thank you cards. But then, we are famous for being rude.................

Q
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 04:58 PM
Response to Reply #72
74. well i guess the french will join us in hell too...
i suspect it will be more unpleasant for you..since you arent used to the heat

:P
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rug Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 06:20 PM
Response to Original message
77. Oh for the love of God, here, now this can end:
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La Lioness Priyanka Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-06-07 06:35 PM
Response to Reply #77
79. ?
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