Let The GAWD Of M.A.T.C.O.M. Tell YOU ANYTHING!

[matcom]

what is it YOU want to hear from GAWD???

c'mon you KNOW you want to KNOW

[displacedtexan]

1. Dear GAWD,

Why can't all food be in cookie form?

[matcom]

3. because i decided that 'dollops' of spaghetti wouldn't work

some things just CAN'T have Macadamia Nuts in them

sorry.

[cade]

2. alright smarty which figure are you ?

http://www.trainupachild.com/cgi-bin/shopnow.cgi?ACTION=thispage&thispage=orig-figures.html&ORDER_ID=115361441

[matcom]

5. um... none of the above (but close)

[cade]

7. this guy ?

[matcom]

9. ACK!! GAWD AND GUNS.......GAWD AND GUNS

it just don't mix well x(

[VelmaD]

4. Dear GAWD...

why are boys the way they are?

[matcom]

6. well you see my dear

there is this THANG that keeps them 'balanced'. if they didnt' have this 'appendage', they would topple over due to lack of balance

if you 'pull' it, it releases the 'tension' :P

[VelmaD]

8. Oh, I knew that

:eyes:

I mean why are they the WAY they are? You know. :-)

[matcom]

10. nobody knows my dear

what, you think I can preform MIRACLES??

:eyes:

:D

[VelmaD]

14. I thought miracles...

were part and parcel of the whole GAWD gig.

It's just a little miracle I'm really wanting anyway.

[matcom]

17. if its a 'little' miracle you are looking for......

call GOPisEVIL

:D

[VelmaD]

21. hee...

you are a vengeful GAWD

*snort*

[supernova]

23. The Pull Toy

is baaaa-aaaack! :D

[VelmaD]

24. I wish...

the return of the pull-toy is sort of the little miracle I'm hoping for. :evilgrin:

[populistmom]

30. My pull toy is gone

:cry:
Where are you, my pull toy? Are you here over there or still there? Wahhhh! It's been almost 3 weeks. I miss you, you, you know who!!!!

That's what I want to know from M.A.T.C.O.M. Where is my pull toy?
:(

[VelmaD]

32. aww...poor baby

:hug:

Not sure which is worse...not knowing where your pull-toy went or knowing where your pull-toy is and not being able to do anything about it. :-(

[populistmom]

33. I know where...

and I know why. I just don't know when and there's nothing I can do.

I love, cute, fuzzy pull toys. Here's one of the cutest I've seen:

[DS1]

11. *grovel grovel* Oh Dear Lord, what is my quest?

[SOteric]

13. I'm in love with that smiley.

Whatever the hell it is.

[matcom]

15. your 'quest' sir

is to find the Holy COED! or, if you will, the COED of 'The Willing'.

now my son, go forth and seek thou Holiest COED! :D

oh yeah, and if you run across that Grail Thingy, fill it with beer and ENJOY!

:bounce:

[SOteric]

12. Oh my GAWD...

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Please hurry, this information is vital.

[matcom]

16. a woodchuck can ONLY upchuck

as much Tequilla as it consumes

..... silly goose...... :eyes:

[trof]

18. Dear Gawd

Why did you make the hair on my head slide down to my ears and back?
Was it something I said?
Or was it that time with Emmadene in the choir loft?
Oh yeah, remember those baby teeth I had?
I could use a few of them now.
Thank you.
Your friend trof
:hi:

[matcom]

20. My Dearest Trof....

as for your hair, remember... i SPECIFICALLY invented the "Comb-Over" for YOU (don't you feel special?)

Emmadene had Cooties or the Clap (i can't seem to remember which) -- sorry

your baby teeth? shit, you got a whole DIME for those!! (waste not want not????)

i suggest a mud bath with Candy&Randy the Nymphomaniac Twin Sex-Pots as therapy

Signed,

Your GAWD

[trof]

26. No disrepect, Gawd,

but that 'comb-over' thing?
It REALLY sux.
It ain't exactly a babe magnet.
Besides, I thougt you invented that just for televangelists.
I'd use that gross Popiel spray-on hair paint stuff before I'd do a comb-over.

I only got a nickel for the teeth.
Did my mom get a cut?
Anyway, I'll give you a nickel each if I could have them back now.

[Martin Eden]

19. Why are there neoconservatives?

I can see why the almighty created cockroaches (a creature to survive the mass extinctions caused by man) and mosquitoes (food for bats), but why oh why were neoconservatives created?:shrug:

[matcom]

22. i created neoconservatives because....

sometimes i run out of toilet paper.

sorry.

[cade]

25. is this you ?

[Ramsey]

27. I want to hear...

How GAWD is going to reward me for being a VERY VERY NAUGHTY GIRL???

Get my drift?
:evilgrin:

:loveya:

[matcom]

28. well, my dear, GAWD knows and sees EVERYTHING!

and GAWD commands YOU to put on that black silk teddy...

and those RED LEATHER Stiletto-Heeled Boots....

and those EDIBLE undies.... (cherry-flavored) if you don't mind..

GAWD will be over later to dish out your 'PUNISHMENT' !!!!!

:D

oh my........

:P :loveya:

[Ramsey]

29. GAWD...

You are so predictable.

Can I request the long whip with all the little tassles this time??

:loveya:

[Padraig18]

31. Why are there 10 hot dogs per package, but only 8 buns?

:shrug:

[Amaya]

34. Will I get laid??

:evilgrin:

[populistmom]

35. Remember

What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Good luck and I hope he's good! ;)