Best imitation of a Freeptard contest

[salinen]

"This country was founded by christians, and if I want to own a tank, that's my right, and I drive a hummer cuz I can, and all minorities smoke crack, and Hilary is satan, and Rush is a great man, and people without health care should be turned away at the hospitals, and global warming is a conspiracy to keep me away from my resources, and.......

[booksenkatz]

1. You're a hard act to follow!

I offer this little tidbit, however:

"The day they took prayer out of schools is the day this country started going to Hell in a handbasket. Notice that HELL and HILARY both start with H... coincidence? And they tell me I can't pray anywhere, well, why is IN GOD WE TRUST on our money?? We can't celebrate Christmas anymore or else they throw us in jail. Pretty soon we won't be able to celebrate ANYTHING."

Would love to continue this brain-numbed activity, but I have an appointment to go to... can't wait to come back and read the entries!

[Bertha Venation]

5. Patsy, your images of * are

terrifying.

[Nevernose]

2. You are forgetting punctuation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Remember: at FreeRepublic, nothing can be written that can't be written without excessive punctuation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Right????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Also, there are apparently no commas, semicolons, or other internal punctuation in the freeper world, so your list should appear more rambling and less coherent.

[Bozola]

4. This isn't quite true.....

Also, there are apparently no commas, semicolons, or other internal punctuation in the freeper world

Freeper punctuation is always expressed with a full colon.

[Nevernose]

6. That was very clever

It took me a second to get it.

[kmla]

7. Sidenote: most of what a Freeper tries to communicate....

...sounds like it was expressed FROM their colons.

For the benifit of the Freepers that don't own a dictionary -

ex·press - To squeeze or press out, as juice from an orange.

Note the use of the Freeper-like full colon in the subject line.
Hmmm. Freeper - full colon. How redundant.

(On edit - pardon me if I walked all over your joke - I'm slow today.)

[name not needed]

3. 'i aint gonna tell you again dammit'

'dats my cuzzin you been sleepin wit! now dem george dubya bush done good. you got aany of them buscuits in there? let the little LIEbruls starve when georgie locks the littllel pinheads in prison for that dang treasohy nthing.. now we gosta get rid of the jewish controlled state media yer here? and dont be speaking your voodoo spangali!

[Radical__Moderate]

8. Yah Know

Things are getting mighty bad round here parts. The next thing ya know you will need to go down to the local wal-mart and buy a God-damn communist metric wrench just to work on your John Deere Tractor.I hear they use the metric system up in Canada and they have socialized medicine as in Union of SOCIALIZED Soviet Republic. When you think about it that red mable leaf is awful close to a red star. Have you noticed the names of the Hockey players. Russians names. They are planning something i tell you. Oh now the Russians are still commies , along with the froggies and the krauts. Damn it the whole world and the eastern LIEbrals are all commies too.They are all working together, I tell you. Remember the Ruski and Canadians shared the gold medal in figure skating. Well it was a French Judge who gave it to them. If they weren't Commies they would have given the gold medel to the americans. I Still dont understand why we need to let all these foreigners compete in the Olympics anyway.

[DS1]

9. *ZOT!*

:evilgrin:

[kodi]

10. no real freeper would forget to mention open season on homosexuals

they rail against them at the drop of a hat as the prime cause of the decline of western civilization.

[Nevernose]

11. You mean they're NOT?

Rush wouldn't LIE to me, would he?

[manic]

12. *deep breath*

We have enough problems without you brain-dead work-shy soap-dodgers supporting the terrorists!!!! Seriously!!! You can march all you like, but your still not gonna get layed by some hippy-chick, coz their all single lesbian mothers on welfare and too busy buying crack to notice!!!

While wear on the subject, you might want to cut it out with the anti-Bush hate-crime, you cheap f****ks! I've noted you'r IP address, and have notified the SS. With any luck, you will be in a cell and taking it up the ass from Sadam by the end of the week.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

13. OH-kayyyyyyy...

When you side with the enemy you loose all right to citizenship that's why it shouldn't be acrime to shot liberals on site, butOF COURSE we have this commie infeltrated Judiciry who sends people to jail for being Christians or Republicans on Hitlery's orders, but the DAY OF INFINITE JUSTICE is coming and you all be a footnote in history just like queers, islamofascists and your pals the soviet union.

Klintoon was the LAST DEMONRAT PRESIDENT EVER!!!!!!!!!! GET OVER IT!!!!!!

(Edited to add mandatory slurs)