What kind of holiday traditions do you have?

[skygazer]

My family lost a lot of traditions when my mom died (I was a teenager) but we've tried to hang on to as many as we can. And we've added some new ones.

1. As long as I can remember, we always got to open one present on Christmas Eve. I kept that up with my kids. It's sort of like a fun preview of tomorrow and always helped me get to sleep on a very exciting night.

2. Whitman's Samplers. My mom (I mean Santa) always put one of those small Whitman's Samplers in our stockings. I continued that too only now I send my kids a little box of See's candies instead.

3. A coloring book in the stocking. Well, it was a coloring book (and crayons) when I was little, then when I got a bit older, it was a comic book, then a magazine of some sort or a puzzle book.

4. Decorating the tree. My dad strung the lights. My mom strung the garland. Then the 6 of us kids hung all the ornaments and at the very end, my dad hung the ancient china angel that he'd gotten at his christening and my mom put the star on top.

5. Calendars. I started a tradition with my kids of giving each of them a new calendar at Christmas. I always picked out something they'd like - one with dogs for one daughter, cats for the other and usually something funny and twisted for my son.

[LostinVA]

1. Fighting with my BIL about politics

[fizzgig]

2. we also opened one present on christmas eve

it was always our new christmas ornament

my sister and i always woke up in the middle of the night to open our stockings and then go back to sleep. our stockings always have an orange in the toe and a trashy tabloid magazine.

we don't decorate a tree anymore because i got tired of putting it up and taking it down, so we started putting a few ornaments on the bougainvillea.

[bigwillq]

3. We do the calendars too.

:)

[bertha katzenengel]

4. My mother died on December 10. My sister decorates on that day.

:woohoo:

[skygazer]

5. Oh, what a nice idea

You know, for years I avoided Christmas because it was so painful to me. I so noticed my mom's absence. But then I realized a few years ago that since my mom loved it so, I could keep her with me in a small way by carrying on with the traditions she loved. It's a work in progress but I do feel closer to her when I'm viewing the holiday through her eyes.

[bertha katzenengel]

11. Oh, skygazer . . .

I am so glad you feel that connection. It's a wonderful thing. :hug:

My sister decorates on that day because it's how she celebrates our mother's death. Our mother sucked. But we're happy!!

I wish I'd been clearer in my previous post. Sorry if I upset you.

[skygazer]

12. LOL, you didn't upset me

We all have family shit, good and bad. Whatever works for all of us.

On another note, I saw your post about the way your dad addressed the card - pretty cool. I never thought I'd ever get along with my dad - we have a lot of bad blood between us - but I do find he's mellowed over the years. He's never actually apologised for any of the crap he put me through (and I don't expect he ever will) but I think in his own way, he's realised he was wrong about some things and tries to be more human in little ways. I can now tolerate him and I never expected that much.

For many years, I wondered why he didn't die instead of her. :shrug: And that's just the way it is.

[auntAgonist]

6. In a previous life

I enjoyed many traditions.
We really don't have any traditions at all. I'd love to have some but my husband isn't thrilled by Christmas so it's very low key here :(

aA

[skygazer]

8. One thing I've realized about traditions

Is that they really tend to evolve and sometimes get lost entirely when the keeper of them dies or moves on or stops keeping them. That's what happened when my mom died - I spent several Christmases in a state of limbo. When I was 16 as a matter of fact, I was home alone for Christmas as my dad and his new wife went to her parents' home!

It made me very bitter and if I hadn't had kids of my own, I might never have celebrated again. I did for them but my heart wasn't in it.

Now, my SO and I don't even really celebrate (interestingly, he lost his mom the same year I lost mine and had the same reaction) but I have better feelings about it and I'm sort of dipping my toe back in.

Holidays can be so great but so rough. I find them to be both. :hug:

[Arugula Latte]

7. I started that calendar thing last year, as well.

We secular-atheist-felinists do have certain traditions:

* The kids and I decorate gingerbread houses.

* We only play our two X-mas CDs while we're decorating the tree; they're forbidden at any other time. (X-mas music gets reeeeeally annoying quickly in our opinion.)

* I string the lights on the tree and the kids and I hang ornaments. Husband puts on a couple.

* The kids and I do sugar cookie cut-outs and ice with colored frosting.

* The kids may open one present on X-mas Eve, the rest in the morning (last year was painfully early).

* The kids can get into their stockings, but must wait until we get up to open presents.

* My husband and I usually take turns going to see a movie on X-mas Day (need to get out of the house!).

[skygazer]

10. I agree wholeheartedly about the music

I work retail - 40 hours a week of nonstop Christmas music from Thanksgiving to Christmas. :nuke:

We always did that about the stockings, too. Kept the kids busy for a while so they wouldn't bug the adults to get up too early!

[HCE SuiGeneris]

9. Mrs. See's candies-- must be nuts and chews -- have to

be stockpiled. And, Mum's champagne while opening our presents! Then big breakfast with fresh-squeezed orange juice. :party:

[TommyO]

13. For as long as I can remember...

even when I was living at home with my parents, I would buy at least one special ornament each year, that accelerated when I bought my condo, and seems to be happening again now that I'm in my new townhouse (yes, I seem to like attached living).

On Christmas Eve we always have a dinner of pierogie and various fish dishes, most of which are caught by my brother. Christmas morning is always a hearty egg and sausage breakfast (mainly because we do a late afternoon dinner), followed by gift giving. Christmas dinner is always something different. Some years it's filet mignon and lobster tail, other years it may be lasagna, other years it's been even simpler than that. Most important of all, our very small family gets together!