I have empirical evidence that my cat is dumber than a worm

[Orrex]

If you construct a T-shaped maze with a foodsource a the end of one branch and a negative stimulus (abrasive surface or mild shock, for example) at the other, an earthworm will learn relatively quickly which one to avoid.

My cats are litter-mates and about 3 1/2 years old. For their entire lives, Henry's dish has been placed on the left, and Hugo's dish on the right. Yet every third morning or so, Hugo goes for the left dish despite a firm nudge from my foot each time.

Before anyone suggests that "Hugo is a Leftist" or something similar, let me assure you that he lacks any political consciousness as far as I can discern. Additionally, I've seen him startle and flee from such disparate threats as a squirrel outside on the porch and his own flicking tail.

[Shakespeare]

1. My cat is dumber.

And apparently has extreme short-term memory issues. When he walks from one room where I am into another (where there's no one), he instantly becomes lost, assumes I've been beamed up somehow, and begins the most piteous wailing you've ever heard. I have to call out to him to let him know I'm still alive. His usual response is to meow with a question mark in his voice (kitty "uptalk"), and come running back into the room where I am, visibly relieved. This be him (in a more relaxed moment):



He's about 20 pounds, and is afraid of the entire world. But he's also the sweetest cat on earth, and will love you to death.

P.S. I think Hugo just wants to eat Henry's food. :7

[Patiod]

2. tough call if ours is dumb or smart

Evidence for smart: when she wants to go from the bedroom to the living room but the door is closed, she gets up on the bed and starts working at the doorknob. She can't get enough purchase to turn it, but she'll try for 1/2 hour.

Evidence for dumb: she'll try to turn a doorknob for half an hour.

[Zavulon]

3. My cat's dumber than yours by a long shot.

Do either of your cats stick their paw into a running fan, get it whacked 5-10 times in that fraction of a second before it shrieks and retracts its paw, and repeat the same mistake 2-3 times a week over the entire summer?