Lessons I have learned from my cat

[LynneSin]

1. My cat is not overjoyed because I have returned home but because he doesn't have the opposable thumbs needed to open up the canister with the cat food and I do.
   
2. My cat enjoys books as much as I do which is why he usually wants to sleep on the one I'm trying to read and usually while I'm reading it.
   
3. Although I would never ever considered drinking out of the box where my cat does his peepee, my cat seems fascinated to try and drink out of the place where I peepee
   
4. My cat sleeps a minimum of 16 hours a day and is only awake for the 8 hours in which I'm trying to get some sleep
   
5. $100 in cat toys can't measure up to the joy and amusement my cat gets out of an empty roll of toilet paper
   
6. Just because I'm done teasing him with the string doesn't mean he's done. Of course if there is no string he'll go after whatever else is moving - like fingers
   
7. Cats don't care if you payed 79 cents for that can of cat food especially if it's something low fat
   
8. My cat picks the best times to relieve himself in the litter box, like when I'm trying to take a relaxing bubble bath
   
9. My cat appreciates the fact that I bring that glass of water for him each night before I go to bed. It's much easier to drink that from the glass I keep on the nightstand then to have to get up in the middle of the night and go to the water dish. Of course he doesn't care that glass of water was meant for me.
   
10. My cat gets first choice of where he will be sleeping on the bed and only after he settles in can I pick where I will be sleeping. Of course once I settle into my spot he'll pester me until I move so he can sleep in that spot instead
    
11. It is crazy to use the fine crystal when drinking a glass of wine - unless you have unlimited funds to buy more fine crystal to replace the fine crystal he knocks over and breaks.
    
12. I can't imagine I've gone this long without my cat in my life and I couldn't imagine life without him.
    

[Catshrink]

1. You're a quick learner, LynneSin

That's the life of a cat's housekeeper. I know I am here only to serve them. Last night I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't move -- four of my five were wedged in beside me. The fifth was edging onto my pillow.

Isn't it great? I love them so much!!

[LynneSin]

2. Well, Abbie needs to earn a living and pay for that broken glass

:cry:

[Catshrink]

Well, they're born hunters.

Don't think there's a market for bird or mouse meat. Although, with this mad cow business, you never know.

[Dookus]

3. heheh....

I'm glad things are working out so well. Sounds like you're a full-fledged cat-lover now. congrats!

[bratcatinok]

4. You forgot one!

My cats fully expect me to do nothing to disturb them when I have to get up in the middle of the night. I have been taught the proper way of getting out of bed without so much as disturbing one whisker of either of my 2 cats. It doesn't matter that they are laying half on top of me either since the rule is that I not disturb them at all! I must admit it was a valuable lesson to learn once I acquired a human bed companion.

[Booberdawg]

5. Yes! It isn't easy crawling out of the top of the bed, is it?

I've got a 20 lb dog that sleeps with me too. He's in front of me and one cat is behind my butt and the other usually by my feet. I can't move the covers!

[Catshrink]

6. My sister bought a new bed because of her dog!

Their little lab puppy grew up -- he now weighs 85#. There wasn't enough room for her and her husband, the dog and the two cats on their old queen size bed. So they bought a california king -- lots of room for everybody. I thought I was bad!

[Booberdawg]

7. LOL! Well I wouldn't go THAT far!!

But then I'm not in to big dogs. That's a little too much animal for me. I like smaller dogs that can fit in the chair with me, or in my lap.

Boober is about 20 pounds, and jus' a lil' baby. The cats are around 10 pounds, give or take.

[Bertha Venation]

10. LOL I thought I was a pushover

because I've slept in uncomfortable painful positions all night, so as not to disturb the cats!

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

8. Ah, grasshopper... your training is going well. The worldwide cat

conspiracy thanks you for your co-optation, urrr, cooperation.

[Bertha Venation]

9. with # 12 you made my day

I'm glad you're enjoying Abbie.

(psst if you have a chance see this thread, please? I'd like your input, thanks!)
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=105&topic_id=577714

[thom1102]

11. Welcome to the Club...

The owned by our cat club... Hope you and Abbie had a happy holiday!