Isn't there an Aspergers group here on DU?

[BlueStorm]

I am curious as I am an Aspergers sufferer and I was wondering if there are others here on DU who have it. I would like to know as I want to share my frustrations and such with others who have it or are familiar with it, as well as they can share. Most of the online groups that I have checked out are usually geared towards parents with kids who have Aspergers.


I am in frustration as I am surrounded by people who think that they understand it, thus they "understand" me but really don't.

I know my post looks a bit garbled as I have alot of things going on my mind at this hour and I am really tired.

Blue

[KamaAina]

1. Not only are there several other DUers with Asperger's,

there is at least one besides you with a Saints/NOLA avatar (see at left). :hi:

There might, indeed, possibly be enough of us to form a group, but I'm not seeing it on the list of groups in the Lobby (right underneath the Forums).

A useful website run for us, by us, is at http://www.autistics.org

Usage note: an "Asperger's sufferer" implies that AS itself causes pain; the pain we experience in our lives is the result of second-class treatment by "neurotypicals", i.e. of discrimination.

edit: got a little slash-happy there, kinda like OJ :evilgrin:

[BlueStorm]

2. Nice to meet you!!!

Thanks for the linky, it's hard to find reliable information on Aspergers.

My hometown has some Aspergers groups but none that deal with adults who have it (like it goes away after a certain age.) so it's hard to find support.

I have a question, does your mom or family ever tell you that you are egocentric? I ask this because I am constantly indunated with this accusation from both my mom and my sister. Like tonight I was over at my sister's and she was telling my mom about this herbal cleansing program that her neighbor invited her to join for no cost. I kept saying that it was something I was interested in and that I would like to try it, etc. etc. Well my sister remarked that "everytime someone says something about themselves you always have to say the same thing about yourself, drawing attention to yourself" she said that she wanted something for herself because apparently my doctor hands everything to me on a silver platter and that when she goes in "it's always about my weight, even if it's a sinus problem."
I stated again that herbal vitamins and such were an interest to me as well and that I just wanted to know more from Amy (the neighbor).

Well my mom accused me of being like "her mom and my dad" that I always want attention, etc.

I just got up and left as I was tired of feeling like I am being abused. I got home and just started crying and I am still getting teary eyed.

Yes, do tend to compare myself to others, but I feel that it is part of my personality when that happens.

My mom acts like she understand me and my Aspergers and that she understands Aspergers but she really doesn't understand a lick of it. She is always correcting my behavior, which some of it is, I admit not admirable, like the picking my undies thing because they are uncomfortable (Yes TMI) but this is just an example of my Aspie behavior, it is so unconscious but I am training myself.
She has to correct me on what I have said, because I apparently say some off the cuff things.
I am wondering if she is embarrassed by me or something. I mean my whole life is like that.

Blue

[Pithlet]

3. It seems to me like your mom and your sister have a problem.

Of course, one of the symptoms of Asperger's is difficulty with some social situations, so it can lead to misunderstanding. But, in the example you gave, I don't see anything wrong with expressing your own interest in a subject someone else is talking about. It sounds like your sister has some issues with being self centered. If she isn't happy with the dialog with her doctor, then it's her responsibility to take care of it and find another doctor and not project that issue on to you. It's not your fault.

[BlueStorm]

6. Yes I would say so...

Like I said, I don't think they really understand. Yes I am a bit egocentric and yes I do have a habit of downing myself, i.e. my weight etc.

I like to talk about religion and politics as well as other things. I like to show off my artwork and I like the praises I get from it (Though I do think I am somewhat mediocre) But if I am around my mom and I happent to strike up a conversation on those topics, my mom usually cuts me off.

Like for example if I am at her dialysis center and I strike up a conversation with Gloria or another person in her pod about the MCA she will usually be like "Ok, Karla that's enough." after discussing it for a while.

How do we go about getting an Asperger's group done?

Blue

[Pithlet]

11. Here's a link with directions

on how to get a group started. I'd definitely be interested in this as my son has been diagnosed as an Aspie. http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=206x10

[BlueStorm]

17. I will check out that link, thanks. n/t

[hunter]

12. Nah, it's like this...

As children my parents had to deal with a lot of kooky adults in their families. When I came along I sandwiched them. (There is a strong genetic component to Asperger's.)

All those horrible insecurities my parents had felt when they were children, I brought those all back.

As a young adult my parents simply couldn't deal with me, and at times I was estranged from them. Even those times I crashed and burned we couldn't talk. At my lowest points I'd end up homeless, because staying with my parents would make us all so miserable. It was simply easier to sleep in my car somewhere far away.

I'm really lucky because I found support beyond my family, and eventually acquired tools and skills to deal with all the misunderstandings, especially with my parents.

[Deja Q]

4. Oh, it can cause pain.

Brought about by rejection and the usual issues regarding, amonst other things, social activities...

And I can say it firsthand; I too am an Aspie.

[Deja Q]

5. Count me in

As having it.

I think a group would be a wonderful idea.

Discussing life experiences, coping skills, et cetera...

[BlueStorm]

7. HypnoToad... I love the frog in your sig.

I remember that episode of Futurama, the broken robots show or something.

Blue

[Porcupine]

8. I thought it was called "The Lounge"

Seriously some of the lounge lizards that hang out here seem to be able to respond 24/7 to a thread that interests them. Computer literate, prefers to communicate through cyberspace; that fits a lot of us.

[mzteris]

13. just what I was thinking...

:rofl:

ain't it just the truth, though?

[Random_Australian]

9. There's a mental health support group on DU.

We're pretty inclusive in their, and it is one of the calmest places on DU, a lot of the time.

Only one locked thread, too. (A mod misread it actually)

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topics&forum=276

[Deja Q]

10. Well, Asperger's is a congenital condition, as is autism...

'mental health' implies anxiety, depression, and other developed conditions that can more readily be treated.

[mzteris]

14. but don't you think a lot of

*those* issues - are associated with AS?

Of course that may probably be a *result* of "society's" problem with those with AS . . .

[Deja Q]

31. Yes. But Asperger's is the root cause. *Those* issues are merely

symptoms brought about by the problem.

The problem needs to be looked at. One can mask symptoms but the problem remains. What can't be cured must be endured (hence the masking), but people need to understand the problem.

What's up with all the * and " marks?

[mzteris]

40. Sometimes I think it's a

complex mixture of "problems". They're ALL symptoms of whatever the underlying cause is (neurological wiring). For instance, my son was diagnosed with dysgraphia. Like that is *the* problem - instead of a symptom of his problems.

I'm on a loop with a lot of moms whose children have - issues - many of whom are AS or "in the spectrum" as it were. There are many of us whose children don't seem to fit IN any one category, but have the symptoms of several - CAPD, NVD, PDD-NOS, AS - getting a diagnosis is like searching for a needle in a haystack.

I don't worry about the diagnosis so much as we homeschool and I don't have to worry about what someone else's idea-du-jour of what "learning" is. Or the completely artificial and unrealistic social stratification of a public school system. BUT - the more I understand what the problem truly is, the better I can help him to help himself with coping, accommodations, and recognizing/building on his considerable strengths.



As for my *'s and "s - well - I'm from groups that predate HTML (and still on groups that don't use them) - so the "s - indicate italics - and *'s are usually for emphasis kind of like using Bold. They're an ingrained habit and quicker than HTML for me. I tend to speak with emphasis on particular words and like to indicate such in my writing in order to try and convey some sense of meaning that can be lost in just this written form of communication. (now there's a run-on sentence! whew! lol) It never occured to me that people didn't understand them! YIKES!

[mzteris]

15. do posts in there

wind up in perpetuity on the net like other DU posts?

I go in there all the time but I'm afraid to post.

[hunter]

18. I've got posts from the late 'seventies and early 'eighties that won't die.

I never expected them to live forever. There are certain word combinations I will NEVER google -- things roughly akin to Kirk licked...

:blush:

I was an astonishingly clueless creature. Maybe I still am, but I like to think I've learned something for all the trouble.

[BlueStorm]

19. Yeah I can see why, lol.. n/t

[BlueStorm]

16. The mental health group is pretty much a blanket group

for all mental illness, though most can be treated and or managed through drugs and/or counseling. Asperger's is a mental illness but one with very strong social repercussions. There is no pill that can treat it like with bi-polar and depression (which I also have) A DU group on Aspergers alone would be helpful to the many on this board that help it. It would be focused on this particular genetic disorder where others can talk about having it and dealing with it in life.

I am not sure if we have enough people to agree to this group.

Blue

[BlueStorm]

20. What do you think of this for a mission statement?

"The Aspergers Group is a forum where those who suffer from Aspergers can post and discuss the various aspects of Aspergers and share life experiences as well as support. People who have children with Aspergers are welcome.

How is that?

BLue

[blitzen]

21. My 9 yr-old son is an Aspie

I'll definitely check out the group now and then.

He's a cool guy and doing pretty well, and he's a mini-DUer. His election prediction: "America will become a democracy in 2008."

[idgiehkt]

22. sounds good to me

I'm in.

[Pithlet]

23. Sounds good. Count me in.

:thumbsup:

[KamaAina]

29. Great, except for that "suffer" thing

I hate to keep harping on this (harp harp harp), but "those who experience Asperger's" sounds less patronizing to me.

[BlueStorm]

38. Actually that does sound better...

I am around alot of pessimistic people so I tend to be a bit negative.

So how does this sound?

"The Aspergers Group is a forum where those who experience Aspergers can post and discuss the various aspects of Aspergers and share life experiences as well as support. People who have children with Aspergers are welcome.

Yep that does sound better.

Blue

[BlueStorm]

24. Great, I will e-mail the Admins...

Hopefully they will consider it.

Blue

[NC_Nurse]

25. My son is an Aspie

also. He's 18. I think a group is an excellent idea.

I think Asperger's is actually categorized as a "developmental disorder" although I think it is neurological. It is not a mental illness in the traditional sense.

[BlueStorm]

27. Yes, it is one of the Pervasive Developmental Disorders...

It is a neurological disorder which in fact does distinguish it from other mental difficulties (I can't think of words right now.)

Blue

[NC_Nurse]

28. You're right.

Too bad health insurance companies don't want to acknowledge it as a neurological problem - they're the ones that call it a developmental disorder - so they don't have to cover the cost
of treatments. :eyes:

[BlueStorm]

30. Right.

I am interested in some case studies that show the neurological physiology of Aspergers patients. I do remember reading somewheres that the brain is a bit smaller or something like that.

Blue

[NC_Nurse]

33. I think that

they've shown that different areas light up than in "typicals" brains in response to social stimuli.
Some parts of the brain may be smaller, but I don't think the brain overall is smaller.

[Deja Q]

32. As I was saying in a different response.

I don't think that fella understands I am one too and know what it's about... it transcends an illness.

[NC_Nurse]

34. True, Asperger's is not an illness

in the way that depression, bipolar, schizophrenia, etc. are.
It can result in mental health problems however, because of the social issues and isolation that Aspie's experience.
I guess that's why it ended up being addressed a lot in the mental health forum on DU.

[Deja Q]

35. BINGO - thank you for an eloquent and tactful response!

And too many people don't understand the differences between Aspies and those who "choose to be alone". (e.g. the obtuse little pundits who say "if people just wouldn't post here and whine and go out, they'd get someone." I wonder if they're also the type that say "If you go looking, you'll never find it" too...)

[NC_Nurse]

39. Asperger's is still fairly unknown to the

general public. They probably don't know what it's like to deal with so they think it's just something one can
put aside in order to gain friends and lovers. Wrong.
Of course, the same could be said for any mental issue - if it was so easy to "get over it" or even POSSIBLE to do so - why would anyone have it?
Duh.

[BlueStorm]

37. I am not a fella, lol...

And I apologize if I keep calling it an illness. I am surrounded by people who think it is and thus it's my habit to keep calling it that.

I was diagnosed in 2002 and I am just finding out more about it. It is certainly a different dimensional aspect of myself. (I can't grasp the words that I want to say right now.)I have gone through a lot of pain growing up and not knowing why I was different from the other peers in my school. My behavior was attributed to my hearing impairment.

Blue

[ThatsMyBarack]

26. I'm an "Aspie"....

....but I work hard to "blend in with the crowd".

[ikojo]

36. I don't think there's an aspie group on DU

I've taken many AQ tests and have tested positive on all of them. I'm an adult and have not yet talked to my primary care doctor about it.

[Feron]

41. In lieu of a DU group,

you may want to visit the forum at Aspies for Freedom. :)

http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com

[idgiehkt]

42. thanks for that link

merci !

[caty]

43. Check out this forum:

http://www.wrongplanet.net/forums.html