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Yer truckin' casually down the street
When a man comes up to ya lookin' beat
With telltale traces of hippie on his chin
You say howdy, he says "Hi,
Got anything that'll make me fly?
And if ya do I surely wish you'd let me in
On what yer dealin', brother."
In your mind you start to wonder
What to turn this fella onto
Then you get a look into his eyes
You find his beard is only make-up
And his line is purely fake-up
Then and only then you realize
He's your Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent
Friendly neighborhood narco man
Courtesy of your local FBI
Your friendly neighborhood narco daddy
All-american finking Feddie
There to trip you up while you are high
You're sitting in the coffeehouse gloom
When the waiter comes up to you with a broom
And asks to sweep the floor around your chair
You ask him why and he says, "Routine -
"We like to keep our coffee clean."
And he begins to tidy up with care
*You light yourself a cigarette
And find out soon as you got it lit
That 40 new-found friends are by your side
Then someone hands you a note that's penciled
Telling you your flight's been cancelled
Just the same you're going for a ride, with your…
Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent
Friendly neighborhood narco man
Courtesy of your local FBI
Your friendly neighborhood narco daddy
All-american finking Feddie
There to trip you up while you are high
You duck into an alley way, thinking,
"Hey, maybe I can cop a J
And get back before the boss finds out I'm gone."
Remembering the golden rule
You look both ways, make sure it's cool
And when there ain't a soul for miles around
You clutch your baggie full of weed
And careful not to spill a seed
You roll a joint as big as Baltimore
And as you take that first big drag in
A helicopter drops a paddy wagon
Guess who's standing smiling by the door
It's your Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent
Friendly neighborhood narco man
Courtesy of your local CIA
Your friendly neighborhood college drop-out
Undercover copper cop-out
Keeping law and order bright and gay
Yes, you find out that the freak your trusted
Is the fink that got you busted
And 20 years is a long time to stay on the ground
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