How long have you known for sure what your sexual orientation is?

[NewWaveChick1981]

(And this isn't a sex thread... :P ) I mean, when did you really step back and realize, "Hey! This is who I really am!" Some of you may not know for sure yet... and that's OK, because you will. :D Being hetero is usually not an issue. And although the social stigma of being gay or bi has eased somewhat, it's still there and will make things way more difficult than they need to be.

I've always known I was bi. As a kid, I didn't think, "Wow! I'm bi!" :rofl: Instead, I just knew I was attracted to both boys and girls. I had friends of both sexes, and I thought nothing of it. I never vocalized it---that was just how I was. I actually realized I was bi when I read the "Life Cycle Library" books that my mother gave me when I was ten to learn about the "birds and the bees". I had started a thread about sex education a couple of months ago, and in it I mentioned how hip and liberal those books were. Well, I couldn't have had a better guide, because those books talked about how there were heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual people, and they described sexual orientation in matter-of-fact terms. Nobody was labeled as "abnormal" or "weird" there, and I wasn't made to feel that I was wrong in any way. I feel fortunate that I dealt with my sexuality in an honest, forthright manner and that Mom had provided such wonderful books to me at such an early age. :)

As I got older, I simply accepted that I was bi and that was that. I didn't know if I would ever act on my feelings. I started dating my first serious boyfriend at 17. I confessed to him that I was bi but had never acted on those feelings. He was intrigued and very accepting. :) However, I did not know where I fell on the bi spectrum until after I broke up with him and had my first same-sex experience. :) I was 22. I experimented throughout my 20s, and after a long, hard period of soul-searching, I came to the conclusion that I was equally attracted to men and women but that I preferred relationships with men and friendships with women. My husband knows all of this and is just fine with it (and it has worked to his advantage on more than one occasion ;) :evilgrin: ).

FWIW, there you have it. :) Unicorns and Peter Pan be damned.... :rofl:

[ThomCat]

1. I'm not sure I know for sure now.

These things tend to change over time.

[NewWaveChick1981]

4. Sometimes they do.

:) :hug:

[tjwmason]

6. Same here...

though I'm pretty certain I know where I am at the moment... and that's good enough for me.

[ThomCat]

7. The only problem is,

you're not right here right now. :P

Or maybe the problem is that I'm not right there right now. :hug:

[Rabrrrrrr]

2. Once I finally was around gay people in my late twenties.

I'd spent my life being pretty sure I was straight, but never had gay friends or even acquaintances (that I knew of), so couldn't be really sure about my straightness.

But once I moved to NYC and started hanging around/being around a lot of gay and lesbian people, then I finally knew that, yep, I am indeed straight.

[NewWaveChick1981]

16. Well, at least you know...

:P

[mark414]

3. ever since me and my friend found his dad's collection of playboy

when we were 8...we stole a couple and were KINGS of our neighborhood

[NewWaveChick1981]

18. I'll bet you were...

:rofl:

[ohiosmith]

5. I have always known that I am a slut.

[ThomCat]

9. I Hate that word.

No reflection on you. You're cool as hell.

But when men apply that world to themselves it's almost a badge or something. But when it's applied to women it's still a scarlet letter, and it's used to club women into submission.

Every time I hear that word I cringe.

[Chan790]

11. I've always viewed it

in the same sense that Margaret Cho used it.

and where, indeed, is my parade? I want a motherf#$king parade.

[ThomCat]

21. Most men tend to like that word

or at least don't mind it. But then, we don't get beaten up with it.

I guess it's different when it's been used against you, or against people who are close and dear to you.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

i love that word. i only use it on people i love.

i only love slutty people...this includes you and haruka :)

[ThomCat]

40. :)

I'll let you call me anything you want. Because you're you. :hug:

[idgiehkt]

48. I love it too.

It's an erotic word for me. But I hate euphemistic speech when it comes to sex anyway, generally speaking. If it has four or five letters, a soft 'u' or 'i' sound, I'm all for it.

[billyskank]

8. I've never looked at a guy in that way

So, I guess, as long as I've been wanting to do it with somebody; I've always wanted to do it with a girl.

I'm just boring.

[ThomCat]

10. You're not boring.

Just self-aware and stable.

As long as you don't mind that we like to flirt with you, it's all cool. :hug:

[billyskank]

12. Hell no, I don't mind

(If I minded I'd have freaked out a long time ago). ;)

:hug:

[NewWaveChick1981]

15. NOT boring. Just completely straight.

:hug: Nothing in the world wrong with that! :loveya: :*

[billyskank]

32. By the way, the answer to your question is

I guess, about 13 years old. I had my first crush on a girl a few years before that, but it was not until puberty kicked in that I started becoming interested in fucking, and I think that's what sexuality is all about really...

:*

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

13. Well, I came out as bi at 15 and gay at 16.

As a kid, I definitely had recognizable crushes on girls from about age 9, although I didn't realize it at the time. I remember being 12 or so and really, really wanting to make out with one of my female friends (a Mormon, no less). I thought I just wanted to kiss somebody, but I didn't make the connection to the gender. I ended up having boyfriends and fooling around with them though a year later.

The first time I dated a girl was when I was 15. It totally felt right and I didn't think I'd ever be involved with a guy. However, even though I'm openly gay, I dated a couple of guys (total failures), and had a few sexual relationships with guys, in college and at theatres I've worked for. You know how those theatre people are...

My attraction towards women is much, much stronger. Although, I also am attracted to trannybois (female to male transgendered). I've exclusively been involved with women for the last two years and I really don't forsee that changing. If anything, being involved with men, just confirmed that I am meant to be with women, even if I did enjoy some of my experiences with them.

[NewWaveChick1981]

22. You've definitely got your act together.

:hi: I'm so glad you know who you are and have been able to accept it. My brother is gay and had a very hard time accepting himself for who he is, but he finally has. I wish he'd been able to do so a long time ago. :)

[xchrom]

14. since i was 5 --

and in third grade my first crush on a boy named donnie.

later mary jane and vickie ran my life --

then i turned thirteen and -- well lets just say i never looked back --

[NewWaveChick1981]

24. Very cool...

:hi: Glad you're so decisive! :D

[Broken_Hero]

17. 3rd grade...

for sure...didnt' fully understand it, but there was just something about girls, that...was intoxicating...:) btw, I'm male...:hi:

[NewWaveChick1981]

26. 100% hetero...

And you've always known it. Good for you! :hi: :P

[Broken_Hero]

35. yep, it was just a simple

progression, that I won't explain...but you get the gist, I imagine...:hi:

[BarenakedLady]

19. Evidentally I had my first boyfriend at age 3

His name was Ray-Ray and I bossed him around. It's been pretty much the same ever since. :rofl:

[NewWaveChick1981]

28. A take-charge alpha female....

...who is also hetero. :D Good for you!

[bigwillq]

20. 12 or 13

I discovered that I found men to be sexy.

I liked to watch the videos on MTV and when I guy in the video had no shirt on, I got excited.

I guess it wasn't until I was 18 or 19, that I knew for sure.

[Felix Mala]

23. I was into "girl" things when I was really young... but I grew out of that

Now I'm just your regular, every day, football-watchin', clock-punchin', belly-itchin', truck-drivin' guy who enjoys sleeping with men. I never remember a time I wasn't fascinated by the male form. Our next-door neighbors had a son who was 15 or 16 when I was about 6 or 7. He ran around all summer in just shorts and had an incredible, God-given physique. I was fascinated by it. Even though they moved, I was fortunate enough to get new neighbors with even more sons a few years later during prime "experimentation" years.

[ThomCat]

42. Wow. Lucky you.

I lived in a white trash neighborhood where I was the only person not experimenting with drugs or alcohol. There were no guys worth looking at in the neighborhood.

[johnnie]

25. I remember looking thru the hole in my mama's belly-button...

When she would be hanging with her women friends, I would peek out my mom's belly and check out the chicks she was hangin' with.

Seriously, I really liked the girl up the street when she was 4 and I was 6. I had her kiss me a few times. :thumbsup:
Oh, and I also made her put her finger in a mousetrap I set. :evilgrin: That was my way of pulling picktails..lol

I have never even entertained the thought of another male. They have absolutely nothing to offer. It doesn't mean I don't love some of my male friends, I do... but the thought of them laying around in thongs and high heels just doesn't do anything for me.

[devilgrrl]

27. Well, on day I got shit-faced drunk and made "the moves" on a few...

married men!!!!!!!!!! :wow:


What's that tell you?

[Felix Mala]

30. That's a great way to make friends. I bet house values in your

neighborhood dropped off.

[devilgrrl]

34. BTW, I remember none of this...

that's how wasted I was. Everyone told me about it afterward. How utterly embarrassing. :blush:

[Felix Mala]

36. Yeah? Well come over to my house, I just got a new bottle of Jack.

[ZombieNixon]

29. Since I was about 4.

When I first kissed Erica down the street and thought it was fun. :evilgrin:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

31. well i think i have become more gay over the years

i was never a very inhibited person so had i felt attraction towards women i would have acted on it...but i didnt...but in the last year i have only felt attracted to women and have exclusively been dating women or ftm's

[Felix Mala]

37. Been gay so long, it looks like straight to me...

[hsher]

33. I still don't know.

38 and still not sure.

[begin_within]

38. When I was in junior high school, I walked past a group of teenage girls,

and one of them pointed at me and said, "That guy's a FAG."

That's when I knew.

[Left Is Write]

39. I never really had to think about it.

My first crush was a little boy in class who asked me what time it was when I was sporting my brand new yellow Donald Duck watch. I was so awed by him and amazed that he talked to me, that all I could do was stammer and point to the watch.

I've been tongue-tied around the boys ever since. :D

[querelle]

41. 9 Years Old

I don't know why, but I just knew that I was attracted to men at that age. Girls simply didn't interest me in that way. When I was 21, I came out to my parents and was expecting a big scene with tears, recriminations, etc......They just looked at one another and said in unison "we know". They actually wanted to know why it took me so long to tell them.

BTW.....all of my dearest friends are women. I seem to relate to women better than men when it comes to platonic relationships.

Q

[cobalt1999]

43. since about 5 years old.

I grew up in a family of all sons. Went to kindergarten and sat next to Susan K., that was that. I didn't know what I was feeling or why, but I was fascinated right off and couldn't take my eyes off her. My middle school years were at an all boys school, after when I went to HS...let's just say, the girls had changed since 5th grade. :)

[trof]

44. As soon as the diapers came off?

I guess.

[Deja Q]

45. I never knew what the feelings were for the longest time...

Well, around age 22 or 23 I finally realized what the feelings were about.

When Crocodile Dundee II premiered, I was attracted to the one guy, but didn't like the feelings I felt; nor did I correlate the two.

My first love I had and knew a bit more clearly what the feelings were about, but lacked the social skills. (to this day, when I feel a strong mutual attraction with a person I get scared and turn the other way...)

I've had feelings for both men and women.

I tried a guy, just to know what it was like, before (my first) suicide attempt. Amusingly, I stopped during the middle because I feared I'd get AIDS. (Didn't make the suicide attempt the next day either.)

I've been attracted to both genders since; typically don't respond to them.

Haven't been to a bar in months. Or anywhere else.

Even when I did, it was basically another world in which I did not fit in.

Social events never worked out in finding that special person either.

These days, if someone can jive with my personality, I'll do what it takes to make THEM feel good. It's the best form of appreciation.

[Guava Jelly]

46. I have known i was straight all my life

And seeing pictures of the ever so beautiful NWC just verifys it :)
How ya doing ..I hope well :loveya:

[calico1]

47. I have always liked boys.

:loveya:

I have never felt any physical attraction to any woman, although I have been hit on by a couple.

[TrogL]

49. I STILL don't know

does 'badly confused' count?

[HEyHEY]

50. When I jetted on a threesome with a girl and another guy

The other guy being there was a sincere turn off. Plus, there was incidental contact. Then I never questioned my sexuality again.

[Road Scholar]

51. Thank you for your honesty. I am heterosexual and I have always been

given the gift (or curse) of trying to understand about everything on this planet. Your honesty is enlightening. I never had a dog in that hunt, but I've wondered what people who did were going through. I guess that's why I'm an engineer and not a judge.:hi: