The (semi)Official Lounge Joke Exchange!

[BikeWriter]

Pick one up and drop one off in exchange. XXX rated jokes will not be accepted.
Thank you.
I'll start this off with...

Learn Chinese in 5 minutes
Ok read the english meanings and then OUTLOUD say the chinese words...
You MUST read them out loud or it doesnt make as much sense)...

1) Thats not right........ Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive................... Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP.............. Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid ................................ Dum Fuk

5) Small horse.................. Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach?.................... Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped in to a coffee table................. Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8) I think you need a face lift...................... Chin Tu Fat

9) It's very dark in here........................... Wao So Dim

10) I thought you were on a diet............... Wai Yu Mun Ching

11) This is a tow away zone....................... No Pah King

12) staying out of sight.............................. Lei Ying Lo

13) He's cleaning his automobile................ Wa Shing Ka

14) Your body odor is offensive.................. Yu Stin Ki Pu

15)Great...................... Fa Kin Su Paw

[BikeWriter]

1. Another...

Joan, who was rather well-proportioned, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel.

She wore a bathing suit the first day, but on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.

She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs. She was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear.

"Excuse me, miss," said the flustered assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs. "The Hilton doesn't mind your sunbathing on the roof, but we would very much appreciate your wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday."

"What difference does it make?" Joan asked rather calmly. "No one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel."

"Not exactly," said the embarrassed man. "You're lying on the dining room skylight."

[BikeWriter]

2. Seamus and Paddy

Seamus and Paddy were getting ready to go on a camping trip. Seamus says, "I'm taking along a gallon of whiskey, just in case of rattlesnake bites. What are you taking?"
Paddy says, "Two rattlesnakes!"