What's wrong with me?

[VelmaD]

Seriously.

I don't have any holiday spirit yet this year. Most years I'm one of Santa's most obnoxious elfs. This year I just can't do it. I've tried. I put up my tree. I put up lights on the balcony of my apartment. I put the xmas knickknacks out around the house. I even started on my holiday cards last night. I have cookie baking this weekend and if that doesn't do it I don't know what I'm gonna do.

Help. I've fallen and I can't get up.

[XanaDUer]

1. Maybe you're suffering from a mild case of depression?

I stopped celebrating the holidays when my mother died around Christmas.

Has not been the same for me for quite some time.

[VelmaD]

5. I think you're right

I've had one major depressive episode in my life so I know what that's like. This isn't even close to the same intensity but it's still dragging me down.

There's a lot of stuff going on in my life right now that has me confused and sad and I just don't want to do the holidays this year.

Part of it has to do with my ex. Last year was the first xmas I spent without him and I didn't let it get to me too much. I just enjoyed my freedom to do the holidays however I wanted. I suppose a big part of the reason I'm down right now is 'cause somewhere deep down I didn't expect to spend this xmas alone. I expected to have somebody in my life by now and though there are candidates, there isn't anyone who's here.

I'm rambling on. Sorry.

[XanaDUer]

14. No problem

Everyone has these moments. Hope you do start to feel better, though.

:)

[neuvocat]

2. Maybe you're tired or something.

The way this year has been, you might have had a lot taken out of you like a lot of us had.

[never cry wolf]

3. The Grinch who stole the WH maybe?....n/t

[HEyHEY]

4. Maybe you need some holiday...cheer...nudge nudge

[VelmaD]

6. From your mouth...

to god's ear honey. :-)

[Bertha Venation]

7. I have no spirit, either, Velma.

I'm glad I'm in good company. I'm depressed. Kathy's depressed. The cats are depressed. Fishy Fish is sick.

Gonna have to force ourselves to decorate this weekend. I'm going to try my hand at gingerbread men. Put initials on them for the people at work.

Wish I could help. :hug:

EDIT: GOD that was depressing. I am sorry.

[VelmaD]

9. Hope Fishy Fish gets better

It helps to know I'm not alone. :hug:

I'm making gingerbread men this weekend as part of my baking extravaganza. I'm hoping that helps.

[Bertha Venation]

36. Thank you. I'm taking him to the fish doc tomorrow.

Actually a woman here who has a betta farm. Says she'll take him home & nurse him. :cry:

[corarose]

8. Get a part time retail job that might give your the spirit

Then again you might end up like I did when I worked at Marshall Fields one year.

Here's the scene.
Ohhh Miss you didn't wrap my package right I wanted the other paper. Yeah which paper was that the one with the frango mints on it hmmmm which one is that? We didn't have one with frango mints on it. I re wrapped the GD package and she told me again that I didn't wrap it right and by that time I had had enough of the snotty little b*tch so I tore a piece of paper off of each roll and I tossed in some ribbon and a roll of tape and told her to take it home and wrap it herself. Next thing she told me she was going to report me and I gave her the directions to the personnel dept because the Manager wasn't it.
They didn't fire me.

I should love Christmas with my last name.

Bah Humbug!

[VelmaD]

12. err...

are we talking xmas spirit or homicidal spirit? :-)

[corarose]

13. Bah Humbug

That's my spirit.

The kid tossed the package at me three times and the other ladies said give her some paper to wrap it on her own we don't have time to put up with her petty shit.

[MuseRider]

10. Me too.

I have not even really thought about it much. Last year this was the last day that my brother tried to communicate, he was in ICU and entubated, after that he just gave up and died on the 14th. I just can't do it. I know that is part of the problem. We always have a big day with tons of friends who do not have family around often 15 or more for dinner. I did not do it last year and am not planning on doing it this year. Can't help you, sorry. Bah Humbug!

[VelmaD]

11. It's ok

You sound like you need one of these. :hug:

[MuseRider]

15. That was really nice!

:hug: right back to you my dear.

[trof]

16. Maybe we should do something about your hair.

Make it...I don't know...make it BIGGER. Big hair is all the rage down here in Dixie.
And contacts.
Maybe Skye Bleu?
Oh, oh, I know! One Skye Bleu and one with a Smiley Face.
And some new T shirts.
One that says "Kiss me, I'm (fill in the blank)."
And everybody knows that tattoos can sure perk a gal up.
Sometimes, all it takes is a simple change of bumperstickers.
Get rid of that "Buck Fush" and get a "If you can read this my phone number is XXX-XXXX".
Try a pedicure? Works for Miz t.
Work with me here.

But seriously, folks...
I usually get the Christmas spirit about 45 minutes into the cocktail hour(s) on Dec. 24.
You are NOT alone.

[VelmaD]

18. Lots of fabulous ideas

I especially like the tattoo one - it's been nearly a year since I got my last tat. Screw buying presents for everyone else. :evilgrin:

I just changed my bumperstickers not too long ago - added candidate stickers for Kucinich, Kerry, and Dean. (I know - I'm indecisive.)

A periducure and a haircut sounds pretty good too.

You're such a help. :hug:

[trof]

20. Thanks for the hug.

I was afraid my lame attempt at levity would bomb.

[VelmaD]

23. I needed a laugh...

I'm trying really hard to perk myself up and laughing helps.

And I'm hugging everyone in sight today. :-) Virtually anyway. Don't think the people I work with would appreciate me hugging everyone I see in real life. :shrug:

[commander bunnypants]

17. Hi VelmaD

Same here - yea ,whoopi, Christmas, I cant even get enough strength too start shopping. O well. :hug:

DDQM

[VelmaD]

Oh god....shopping

I have bought exactly 2 presents so far. And one of those I picked up in Mexico earlier in the year so it doesn't really count as xmas shopping.

I was essentially ordered to go out and buy tinsel and put up my xmas tree and I happened to see something for the person who gave the "order". But that's it. Haven't picked up anything for anyone else yet. *eep*

[KCDem]

19. I'm in the same mood.

I feel like there's got to be more to life than this... like I'm just coasting from day to day. Christmas is gonna suck, 'cuz it's just going to be the 4 of us with absolutely no family to speak of.

The only thing that keeps my spirits up is the kids. I gotta do it for them.

Hope the baking helps.

:hi:

[VelmaD]

21. I'm kinda lucky...

my brother and his wife and my nephew are coming to visit from Florida and I'm really excited about seeing them. But, my best friend isn't gonna make it to our hometown for xmas and that's just not gonna feel right at all.

Hey, you guys want a box of goodies from the baking extravaganza? I'm trying to foist off calories onto others. It's better to give than to recieve ya know. :-)

[KCDem]

44. I'd love one!

I was starting to worry that this Christmas would have to go sans-baked goods, as my oven broke the day before thanksgiving. It got fixed yesterday, though, so guess I'll need to bake a bit.

[geniph]

22. I apparently don't have the Holiday Spirit gene

or the decorating gene, and anyone who knows me, knows that cooking anything is out of the question. So what you're describing that you've already done would be a whirlwind of holiday festivity for me. I don't quite get the whole thing about putting up a bunch of flashy ticky-tacky crap that just has to be taken back down in a couple of weeks anyway. What is the point?

[VelmaD]

25. Well, for me...

the point is that I like sparkly lights and tinsel. And normally I love baking and shopping and decorating and all that stuff. So for me being in this mood is really not normal.

[geniph]

45. Who can feel holiday-ish with the Occupation government

squatting in our White House? I'll feel like celebrating when those assholes are packed back off to Crawford.

[JohnKleeb]

24. wow me too Velma, I just dont get it

[VelmaD]

26. Wow, it isn't just me...

I have personal stuff going on that's bringing me down but with so many others in the same boat I'm starting to believe it's more than that.

Maybe it is Chimpy being in the White House. Maybe it's the fact that we're in the middle of a war in Iraq that doesn't seem like it's ever going to end. Maybe it's because the Dems can't get their shit together and fight the bastards. Maybe the whole damn country just has bad karma right now.

[JohnKleeb]

32. That could be it for me I guess too

I dont get it. I normally am in high spirits.

[VelmaD]

34. One more thing...

to blame on the junta...they ruined my holidays.

[JohnKleeb]

46. yeah true

bastards :(

[TEXASYANKEE]

27. Don't force it.

I'm not in the holiday spirit this year either. But what I've found from experience is that, if you don't feel it, don't force it. Just do what makes you happy. Trying to make yourself feel the spirit of the season can end up backfiring, and you'll end up feeling even worse. Do whatever makes you happy ... if that means less decorating, less parties, less presents ... than so be it.

It sounds like you understand why you're feeling what you're feeling (a slight case of depression?) and that's the most important thing. Be true to yourself and this holiday season, too, shall pass.

I can't even listen to Christmas music this year, which is very unusual for me. But I'm thinking the urge will hit me at Midnight Mass and, as always, I'll cry when the choir starts O Holy Night. Aren't emotions wonderful little critters?? :-)

[plcdude]

28. hey

put on festive music, call up friends, go out shopping with dear ones you don't have to buy anything, get pine scented candles to burn and snap out of it. We have very little time to enjoy life don't waste it on wondering what's wrong. That's what is wrong. Live and love those around you and life will be full. Merry Christmas Friend and have a blessed New Year.

[VelmaD]

31. Thank you

Jesus h christ you guys are being so damn nice and I'm gonna start crying at work. :-)

Happy holidays to you too.

[plcdude]

33. You can always

come to our house if you want but it is Oklahoma.

[VelmaD]

37. Thanks, but I'm good

I've got a ton of family and if nothing else works then seeing my momma and my 4 year old nephew will fix me right up. :-)

I just have to make it through until xmas - then I have a week off to let my momma take care of me and play with the nephew and just sit and do nothing for a little bit and try to get my head in a better place.

[plcdude]

35. also you could

change your avatar jeesh.

[VelmaD]

38. But I like...

my witch avatar. :evilgrin: And none of the holiday avatars really called out to me when I looked at them.

[plcdude]

40. okay

as long as you're happy which is something only you can choose for yourself. Do you drink alcohol?

[VelmaD]

42. only very rarely

I'm kinda a control freak and I have this problem with the lack of control involved with getting inebriated.

[SmileyBoy]

29. I haven't had the christmas spirit since I was 14.

Even though I'm Muslim, my family still celebrates christmas as a strictly secular holiday. Now, I've lost that Christmas spirit for a long time now, and I really don't know why. I'm not really interested in getting gifts anymore. I still give to charity, in fact more than ever. I'm spending more money than I've ever spent on gifts for my family. still, I'm not in the spirit. I'm not interested in getting gifts. Haven't been for 7 years or so.

[bif]

30. I'm not into it either.

Give me Thanksgiving over Christmas anyday. I think it's way overrated. Long walks seem to help me. My mom passed away on december 2nd 14 years ago and the holidays just haven't been the same since. Plus my Dad goes to Florida and one of my brothers goes out to California this time of year. So Christmas dinner is no biggie!

[VelmaD]

39. Sorry about your mom

That's rough. Hope you have a happy holiday season anyway. :hug:

[bif]

41. Thanks

Yeah, we were pretty close. In fact I was born on her birthday! So now, my birthday isn't quite as happy as it could be. But we muddle through, don't we? Actually, my work closes between Christmas and New Year so that's kind of nice.

[peacefreak]

43. This is a loaded time of year for me, too

Lost my brother (21 years ago today, as a matter of fact) & other family members this time of year. I also work retail so that sucks the spirit right out of me.
I decided a long time ago to redefine how I celebrate & who I celebrate with. If I write cards, good. If not, that's OK, too. If I find the right present, I give it. If not, there's always next year. I refuse to buy into the consumer crap. I deal with it on a daily basis.
My point dear VelmaD, is don't pressure yourself too much. Sometimes my spirit is just on pilot light. And sometimes it flares! Had a stirring the other day when it was snowing & the Nutcracker was playing. Make it into what feels right for you.

[corarose]

47. I am related to a famous Christmas person

Bah Humbug I say for this time of year.

[Skittles]

48. I WOULD KICK YOUR ASS

IF I DIDN'T FEEL THE SAME WAY. :O

[VelmaD]

49. You can kick my ass...

when I'm up in Dallas for xmas if I'm still not in the mood by then.

[grasswire]

51. find the nearest elementary school...

...and go to their holiday program. That's always a kick in the pants. Third graders playing the tuba, you know the drill.

Or plan something totally different. Get a couple of friends to go to your local skid row with bags of oranges and candy canes, and pass them out to street folk. There's one guy in my town who takes a cooler full of hot baked potatoes downtown and gives them out.

Or maybe go to a carol singalong.

I always have much less Christmas spirit than my daughter does, unfortunately. Responsibility for a dependent person can be a damper to Christmas spirit when you have a lot of worries and not a lot of resources.

[Skittles]

56. YO VELMA

get a better lounge picture; it looks like a freaking mug shot.

[populistmom]

50. I don't either

I could relate to a lot of what KCDem was saying about there's got to be more than this. I've been going through the motions regarding many things for a long time. While I love actual Christmas day with my children and seeing their faces and that excitement of their innocense I always end up with too much of the Christmas responsibility on my shoulders- doing everything except for whatever last second gifts my husband gets me. My only family near me are my parents who are negative, antisocial people, and my mother is angry and hates me for no other reason than she's envious of what she perceives as me having this "perfect" life I don't deserve. Yes, she has said this and yes, she's in her own delusional world. My dad is just chronically depressed and self-depricating. My husband just went back to his old position at work after the department he had been in for a year was cut and dealing with the same poor management and behind the scenes junk as before, so I have to be "supportive of him", prepare Christmas's EVERYTHING, and oh, take finals for the two classes I'm taking and get my nursing applications in by mid-January. Now that my best friend lives in FL, I have not one person who can every just be there for me without wanting something in return, who just likes me for me. The days all blend into one as the years keep rolling by, everyone I know oblivious to what I might need and who I am.
End of rant, back to dinner prep and study mode.

[VelmaD]

52. oh honey

That's a lot to shoulder and you're an amazing person for handling it all with so much grace. :hug:

I'm relaly sorry about your best friend moving away. I'm the luckiest woman in the world because my best friend (since the 7th grade) lives in the same city as me again. I don't know what I would do without her. You're right - it's wonderful to have someone who likes you just for you and doesn't always want something.

Have another :hug:

We all like you for you honey. :-)

[populistmom]

55. Thanks, I needed a hug

Generally, I'm not a whiner. I tend to lothe whining in fact, but some times, some days, are harder than others, and I have so many responsibilities and so much has changed for the worst these past few years based on actions of people besides myself. I try to spend my time turning the proverbial lemons into lemonade until I'm able to possibly make different choices, but occasionally, I just run out of sugar for awhile and all I taste is sour.

I hope you feel better too, Velma and get some enjoyment out of this time of year as well.

[onebigbadwulf]

53. Is it your witch avatar?

[VelmaD]

54. I didn't think so...

but you're the second person to mention it so I'm gonna have to reconsider.

I loved that avatar when I put it up at Halloween. I'm not exactly a witch but I'm very pagan-friendly and that avatar has grown on me.

But, maybe it's time for a change. :-)

[BiggJawn]

57. Not into it either this year.

Dunno....Either because I'm bummin' on the "world situation" or maybe because I don't have as much spendage this year, but I wish it was January already...

Sure could use a little "Piece on Earth" to give me goodwill towards mankind...

[Capn Sunshine]

58. Velma, EVERYBODY who cares about the country feels this way

I too was once a happy Christmas elf. 2000 Dec was my first time in 30 years I didn't put up lights. No lights last year either.

so far, none this year, but i just may go buy every Eminem album made......

http://www.mit.edu:8001/people/jonb/animate/grinch.gif