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astonamous Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:01 PM
Original message
Nice Expressions to Describe Dumb People
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

A few clowns short of a circus.

A few fries short of a Happy Meal

A few Cokes short of a six-pack.

A few peas short of a casserole.

The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.

One taco short of a combination plate.

A few feathers short of a whole duck.

All foam, no beer.

The cheese slid off his cracker.

Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.

An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.

As smart as bait.

Chimney's clogged.

Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.

Forgot to pay his brain bill.

Her sewing machine's out of thread.

His belt doesn't go through all the loops.

Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.

In the pinball game of life, his flippers were a little further apart than most.

*********************************

Do you have a favorite that isn't on this list?
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KitchenWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:03 PM
Response to Original message
1. Lights are on, noone's home
Driveway does not make it to the garage
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astonamous Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:05 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. ROFLMAO! n/t
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KitchenWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:09 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. which one?
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astonamous Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:24 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. The driveway not going all the way to the garage. Never
heard it before.
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SethInUpstateNY Donating Member (228 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:04 PM
Response to Original message
2. The engines running,
but nobody's behind the wheel.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:07 PM
Response to Original message
4. Challenged and special.
Nothing against challenged or special people, but--I've been using those term a lot this week.
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unsavedtrash Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:08 PM
Response to Original message
5. not the brightest crayon in the box , Bless his pointed little head, not
the sharpest tool in the shed.
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bertha katzenengel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:08 PM
Response to Original message
6. not the brightest bulb on the string/in the box
Or just this mild one, for one of my favorite people:

He's a good egg. :shrug:
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Elidor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-08-06 10:25 PM
Response to Original message
9. Six bricks shy of a full load
Edited on Wed Mar-08-06 10:26 PM by Hardhead
Elevator doesn't stop on all the floors.

Down here in the South, you can say whatever mean-spirited thing you want about anyone, as long as you amend it with, 'Bless his heart.' "Billy Bob is so stupid he couldn't pull a greased string out of a cat's ass. Bless his heart." That's everyone's que to laugh. :evilgrin:
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reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 12:46 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. And, if Billy Bob's a REAL numbnuts
you expand it to "Bless his li'l pea-pickin' heart"

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meow2u3 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 12:41 AM
Response to Original message
10. A couple of pennies short of a roll
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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 12:57 AM
Response to Original message
12. One I made up for newspaper types
"He's a couple of columns short of a page."
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reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 01:17 AM
Response to Reply #12
14. Perfect!
I know a couple of people like this!!
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Random_Australian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 12:58 AM
Response to Original message
13. Kangaroos in his top paddock
bright as a two-watt bulb
drives uphill with the clutch slipping
got space to sell between the ears
thick as the dust on a public servants out-tray
wouldn't know his arse from his elbow
Couldn't find his arse with both hands and a torch!
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 01:18 AM
Response to Original message
15. Too much foam, not enough beer.
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Blue_Tires Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 01:27 AM
Response to Original message
16. not firing on all cylinders
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Benfea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 01:32 AM
Response to Original message
17. Some of those describe crazy people, not stupid people.
Oh, and you left "Republican" off your list.
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politicat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 01:38 AM
Response to Original message
18. Gets lost playing "peek-a-boo."
Went to the Stupid buffet a few too many times.

Needs a Post-it to remember to breathe.

His Hard drive's skipping.

Needs more RAM.

Got a megahertz brain in a gigahertz world.

Put his points in Strength and Con. (Gotta be a D&Der to get that one...)

All he needs is a hamster and a talking sword.... (That one's really obscure, but the reference comes from Baldur's Gate II.)


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Random_Australian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 01:50 AM
Response to Reply #18
19. (No saying)
My goodness those people from Baldur's gate like insanity plus hamsters. It's in BG1 as well.
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politicat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 02:38 AM
Response to Reply #19
20. It's the same character.
His dialogue got better, too.

(I am such a geek....)
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Sugar Smack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 02:40 AM
Response to Original message
21. "Bless his heart"
:rofl:
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Common Sense Party Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 02:47 AM
Response to Original message
22. Republican.
I always go for the easy, obvious answer.
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wildhorses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-09-06 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
23. He doesn't have ulcers but, he's a carrier
He's been working with glue too much.

Got a full 6-pack but, lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.

This person has delusions of adequacy.

He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

He's got two brain cells. One is lost and the other one is out looking for it.

The wheel is turning but, the hamster is dead.

Takes him two hours to watch 60 minutes.

One neuron short of a synapse.

It's hard to believe he beat out a million other sperm.

If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.

When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell.
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