I fell off the wagon today...:(

[Broken_Hero]

I have been smoke free since June 3rd, of 2005. Today, though, I fell off the wagon big time. I tried my hardest to keep the urge away, and smokers, and ex smokers know the feeling, it kept knawing at me, and it felt like my damn head was going to implode/explode at the same time...so, here I am again, a smoker...bought 3 packs today...

I have quit a ton of other illegal drugs, but for some reason, I cannot shake the ghost's, the demon of smoking...man, do I feel so weak, but oh well...*raises his cigarette in salute*, here's another, fallen off the wagon of non-smoking....:(

[Nutmegger]

1. Personally I don't smoke

but I have a few relatives who do. One of them quit successfully and told me that it was one of the hardest things they had to do. And this person had issues with many drugs so that's saying something.

Here ---------->:hug:

[Broken_Hero]

2. thanks...:) n/t

[crispini]

3. Why not just smoke one or two and then stop again?

Nothing wrong with falling off the wagon as long as you can get back on.

I had to quit so many times before it "took."

[Broken_Hero]

4. yeah, true...

I have gone through this all last week also...I would buy a three pack, smoke about five, and then toss the rest...i dont' know, waste not, want not...:(

[crispini]

7. Ok, this sounds awful but when that happened I would give them away.

Give them to other smokers or a homeless guy or something. Sounds like I'm sharing my cancer but hey, they usually really appreciated it since smokes are so expensive.

Just concentrate on how nice it is to BREATHE ... and maybe look for another way to de-stress? Work out, take a yoga class, etc?

[LaurenG]

5. You can quit again

Studies show that it can take several times trying before you finally quit. Be nice to yourself. :hug:

[SeattleGirl]

6. I just did the same thing -- tumbled off the wagon.

:blush: :blush:

But, I'm determined to be smoke-free again. And I think you can do it too, petersond. I will tell you something, though. I used to work in alcohol/drug treatment facilities, and I have had many addicts who quit smoking, who told me that quitting nicotine was harder than quitting heroin, cocaine, alcohol, and any number of other drugs, so you're feelings are not unusual in the least.

:hug:

[Broken_Hero]

11. Yeah, I can

Understand that. Through my life, i have quit weed, heroin, coke, extascy, meth/crank, valium, and a good hanful of prescription pills, but god, this one is a kicker!...I know i will be smoke free again, but damn...these rough patches are bitches, i swear.

[Taverner]

8. The patch works for me

But I'm still on it so go figure...at least theres no cancer risk - in patch form Nicotine is no more dangerous for you than Caffeine.

[bigwillq]

9. Don't give up

You can quit again. You went that long without one so you know you have the willpower to do it again.

One question--Why did you buy three packs when it seemed like all you needed was one or two cigs? :shrug:

[Broken_Hero]

12. because they were on sale...:)

I don't know, i guess it a sick twisted scenario of addiction/captilsim...three packs for 5 bucks...just saw, it and thought it was a deal...i'm a smoker, i dont' think right when the sickness is on...:)

[BikeWriter]

10. One thought, Pard. I had a heart attack in 2003, my Doc said...

I survived it because I'm a non-smoker.

[khashka]

13. weak? Weak? WEAK?

You did a tremendous job since June. So you had a setback. So fucking what? If you did it once you can do it again.

I've kicked several habits - crystal meth, uppers, downers, pot, acid, etc. Cigs have always been hardest. The fact you went so long without says a great deal about you. I've never managed that long.

Cigs are the hardest. I never missed the rest. Well, not quite - but once every few years is hardly an addiction. Cigs are different.

Good for you for what you accomplished! And if you did it once you can do it again!

Khash.

[Broken_Hero]

15. I never missed the rest either...

even beer/liqour. Yeah, I have been off and on again with smoking...since...hmm, july of 2003. I went from the 20th of July until january 1st of 2004 without smoking, than went back on again, until august of 2004, and then went from august until jan 1st again, before falling down...then in june of 2005, i decided to get back on the horse, so it isn't the first time...Its just, damn, I know that I will never kick the habit and that is what is irritating, the feeling, the knawing is still there after shit, almost 8 months? If i made it until this weekend, it would have been over 8 months, but damn...

One of my bosses back home in alaska, told me he has been smoke free for over twenty years, but the instnat he smells it, the cravings are back big time, he says he has the hardest time, when he goes into bars, the sickness gets right on top of him quick. At the time, i was like...shit, you went over 20 yrs smoke free, and the knawing is still there? Makes me wonder, what the FUCK they have in cigarettes to make them these addictive...but anyways.

I'm back on the wagon tomorrow, my wife smokes also, and that is rough. Its hard trying to quit, when its in front of you...not constantly, but she goes off for a few days, and then spends a few days smoking, her pattern is like that, and I have been strong mostly, until this past weekend i fell off for two days, and i spent another twoo off, until today...but alas, the good fight continues...my wife owes cigs to some coworkers, and her aunt, so thats where the other two packs are going, as not to waste anything...:P

[Lone_Star_Dem]

14. I still keep nicotine gum on hand for just such an emergency

It's kept me from falling off the wagon many times. When, for whatever reason, the urge becomes too much, I chew a gum. I don't remember the last time I needed one, but just in case I still have them.

Don't worry, the climb back up on the wagon isn't too high, but it will be easier if you get rid of those smokes in some fashion other than smoking them. :)

[Syncronaut Seven]

16. I've got a friend over at Phillip Morris who says

Quiting is highly over rated.

Just get back on the wagon friend. They're trying to kill you, you know that right? Pisses me off when people target ME for painfull death.

That's why I've been tobacco free since 2000.

[Broken_Hero]

18. Ha, Quiting overrated?

Yeah, I would expect that of someone who works for Phillip Morris. Its a bitch though. I knew I had to quit last June, i was heavily over weight, i was up to 383, smoking almost a pack a day...I would have some chest pains every night before I went to bed, and then i decided to get off them again. I quit on the 3rd of June, and gave myself a couple of weeks, to get over the worst part, and then started working out, and by god, i do notice a difference, and i notice a huge difference, when i do fall of for a day, and then get back on the wagon the next day, the sore throat, and hacking come back almost instantly for me.

But since June, i walk 3.5 miles a day, do over 15 miles on my bike, and I eat right (mostly). NO more fast food, and almost 0 sugar. But im' on a low fat diet, i don't buy into this carb craze thing, and im' down to 330 lbs as of the 21st of January. I have to go the doctor to weigh myself, because most convential scales i see at walmart and what not, dont weigh people over 300lbs...so, i am trying, just anothe bump in the damn road...:) But thanks for all the kudo's and support guys! I dont' get this from anyone...my wife falls off the wagon daily, and the support i get from her is "sorry"...which i can understand, because my fat ass wants a smoke too!...:)

[EstimatedProphet]

17. Smoking cigarrettes is REALLY hard to quit

Sorry to hear it man. I gave them up 5 years ago, and haven't had another yet. However, I do still smoke the occasional cigar, pipe, and hookah. However, those I have a lot more control over.

[Broken_Hero]

20. How occasional?

I've been thinking of switching to a pipe, cause my mother in law smokes prince albert, in her cobb pipe, and it is pretty good, and i don't feel the same shake as i do with cigarettes, but how occasional, is occasional? one a day? one a week?...what is your definition of occasional?

[Race4Peace]

19. AGAIN?

[Broken_Hero]

21. Yeah, again...

i climb back on the wagon tomorrow....