OK. You're in heaven. What's your first sign that its heaven?

[undeterred]

My border collie (who died in 1992) is hanging out at the gates barking her head off!

[Reverend_Smitty]

1. The friends and family that have died before me are there...

and welcoming me with cold beer and a plate of bottomless nachos!

[jeff30997]

2. I'm in bed with Jennifer Love Hewitt.

O8)

[RevCheesehead]

3. Jesus sees me coming, and ducks for cover.

He knows I'm gonna demand lots of answers. O8)

[RetroLounge]

17. Oooh, I would like to see that!

Poor guy wouldn't stand a chance.

RL

[La Lioness Priyanka]

4. no poverty

[cynatnite]

5. That god's a woman...

she says EVERYONE was wrong about her.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

6. None of the cars have "W" bumper stickers.

[ucmike]

7. monkey butlers

[Indy_Dem_Defender]

28. How's

W going to be in heaven being a butler when he'll be need in hell full time?

[philosophie_en_rose]

8. Pets and family at the gates.

:hug:

[sarge43]

9. Really great music

Duke Ellington has put together a killer pickup band and Miss Ella is singing Gershwin.

[Guy Fawkes]

10. All the cheese...

is made in Wisconsin.

[trof]

11. I walk into the kitchen.

There are 4 faucets.
Hot, Cold, Scotch, and Soda.
The ice machine is the 100 pound restaurant type.

[tjwmason]

12. At the arrivals lounge where we're being sorted there' a television screen

It's in the middle of a Lord's test match score: Australia 45 all out, England 300-1. It's a beautiful sunny English summer's day, and a waiter passes me a perfectly mixed Pimm's without even having to be asked.

[MissHoneychurch]

13. My dad

my grandfathers, my geatgrandmother, my cats

[FarLeftRage]

14. No sign of reich-wingers anywhere

And nothing but peace, love and understanding everywhere...

[skygazer]

15. The bouncer coming to throw me out n/t

[undeterred]

16. Who is Heaven's Bouncer?

I bet that's a sought after position!

[Giant Robot]

18. I understand n/t

[WritingIsMyReligion]

19. Pat Robertson ISN'T there.

:evilgrin:

[LeftyMom]

20. I walk up the walkway, to a little cottage

along the side is a little garden patch of perfectly summer produce, Rockie the exceedingly lazy boxer is napping beneath a tree full of ripening and fragrant olives. I open the door and Vlad, my bunny, is making little figure eights around my feet and biting my shoes, in the kitchen Sushi, a lovable but not that bright cat is demanding lunch and attention in that order. I get his food then notice that there's a lasagne and some in the oven and there's half an hour left on the timer. I get plates down, set the table and wander off to see just what constitutes paradise in the bedroom...

[Twillig]

21. God, in the image of

Bertrand Russell says to me: "Gotcha, Beoytch!"

[TallahasseeGrannie]

22. An amazing fragrance

a lot of green grass and flowers and walking up to a barbecue attended by my parents, grandparents, all the folks from the old neighborhood, with Bach, Mozart and Handel playing their latest work.

[Straight Shooter]

23. Satan off to the side of the Pearly Gates, to retrieve the Republicans.

Just in case some managed to get even that far. :evilgrin:

[Richard Steele]

24. Well, if I'm there... IT'S A TRICK!! RUN FOR IT!!!!

[Wapsie B]

25. The love is flowing freely.

*wink wink nudge nudge*

Gotta live that part of the 70's I missed sometime. :evilgrin:

[DemoTex]

26. The dogs will be in heaven before us ...

I'll be looking for Sweet Sirius (8/25/2005). When I see Sirius, I'll know that I'm there.

[undeterred]

32. I imagine dogs from different eras of my life

all hanging out together in heaven!

[GrpCaptMandrake]

27. I'm strolling down a street paved with gold and

walk into the incredibly busy Wal-Green's in Heaven. At the lunch counter, George Wallace, Lester Maddox, Strom Thurmond and every Bush ever born are scurrying futilely around as a host of customers yell "Boy, hurry up! Boy, get me a co'cola! Boy, ain't you got no good sense?"

A patron turns to me and says "It ain't their fault. It's how they's borned. 'Sides: all them Republicans look the same to me."

Meanwhile, out in the hickory pit in back, Ronald Reagan and Richard Nixon turn forever and ever and ever, butt-to-butt on a barbecue spit that's being lovingly turned by a smiling Abraham Lincoln. "Republican, my ass," he says, as I wave to him. "I know barbecued fascist when I smell it."

[Radical Activist]

29. All the monkeys are happy.

[LaraMN]

30. That I'm getting kicked out.

:shrug: :rofl:

[lizziegrace]

31. I hear California Peggy say

"My dear Lizziegrace!" Then I'll KNOW I've made it to heaven.

[mac56]

33. No boom cars.

:hide: