The FESTIVUS for the REST OF US ! ....

[Trajan]

Ok: I see Merry Christmas threads .... and I see Happy Quanzaa threads ....

Im sure if I look, I will find Happy Hanukkah and various other assorted holiday celebration threads in here ....

But what about FESTIVUS ?

What of the FESTIVUS FOR THE REST OF US ?

Ok ok ok ... I know what you're saying :

"But the Festivus pole is SO plain ! "

"But will anyone hear me when I air MY grievences ?"

"Does ANYONE think I can pin down the Head of the Household with THESE little scrawny arms ?"

Let me tell you: It is, they will, and you can ! ...

(See how easy this is ???? ...)

The FIRST Festivus: NOT December 18, 1997 on Seinfeld; but an ancient festival based around the Winter Solstice, like xmas is ....

But let's give thanks where it is due: It was a FESTIVUS MIRACLE on that day in December, when all gathered round the Festivus Pole to air their grievances, eat spaghetti, endure feats of strength and finally: PIN the head of Household to the mat ! ....

What are the elements of Festivus, you ask ?:

The Festivus celebration includes four major components:

* The Festivus Pole: The Costanzas' tradition begins with an aluminum-glass pole, which Frank praises for its "very high strength-to-weight ratio." During Festivus, the unadorned pole is displayed. The pole was chosen apparently in opposition to the commercialization of highly decorated Christmas trees, because it is "very low-maintenance," and also because the holiday's patron, Frank Costanza, "finds tinsel distracting."

* Festivus Dinner: The Festivus dinner menu is flexible, but it should consist of filling, non-holiday comfort food (no turkey, duck, or goose). The televised dinner featured what may have been meatloaf or spaghetti in a red sauce. (Presumably, an entree in a red sauce is more festive.) Kruger took a flask out from his jacket and took a swig; so one might interpret that drinking is optional. In the Festivus book by Allen Salkin, drinking is encouraged with hearty beer, cheap rum, bourbon, or wine.

* The Airing of Grievances: At the Festivus dinner, each participant tells friends and family of all the instances where they disappointed him or her that year.

Frank Costanza: "I've got a lot of problems with you people, and now you're going to hear about them!"

* The Feats of Strength: The head of the family tests his or her strength against one participant of the head's choosing. Festivus is not considered over until the head of the family has been pinned to the ground. A participant is allowed to decline to attempt to pin the head of the family only if they have something better to do instead.

Ah .. and dont forget the possibility of a FESTIVUS MIRACLE ! .... like finding an open store that has BEER for sale on xmas, er, Festivus ....

So; brothers and sisters ! .... mothers and fathers, aunts and uncles and cousins galore ! ....

GET READY FOR THE FEATS OF STRENGTH ! ....

I'm GOIN IN ! ......