High School classmates--do you ever want to see them again?

[jane_pippin]

There are a few people I wouldn't mind seeing, but for the most part I don't care to see anyone from high school ever again. About a year ago I got an email out of the blue from someone who was a close friend. We hadn't talked for about 7 years and now we do pretty regularly, but it's a little strange. Good, but strange.

What about you? Is your little group still together? Have you run into anyone you didn't want to see? Have you run into someone you did want to see but thought you never would?

[GOPisEvil]

1. Not really. I couldn't care less about those people.

My friends that remain in my life from that period of time did not attend my high school.

[Rising Phoenix]

2. there are a handful of people I want to see...

[Wcross]

3. Very few.

I have kept in touch with some, others I would not care to see at all. There is one guy I wouldn't mind meeting with so I could open a can of whoop-ass on him again. We fought on a regular basis and I kind of miss him...........

[johnnie]

4. Not really

I had a lot of friends when I attended high school, but my main friends were the guys in my band and we still hang out.

High school is such a sliver of life. I still don't understand the way people cling to those 3-4 years of their life. High school reunions, blaming the people in high school for how they turned out, joining websites and actually paying to see where people from high school are at and so on. I just don't get it.

[jane_pippin]

6. Yeah I don't get that either

Other than the person I mentioned in the OP, there's one person I'd like to know about to find out if he's doing okay but I'm not going to spend all kinds of energy trying to find that out either.

You reminded me of this book, Home Land by Sam Lipsyte. It's about a guy who starts writing brutally honest updates about his life to his old high school newsletter. It's very funny and full of healthy venom. Here's a link:
http://www.amazon.ca/exec/obidos/ASIN/0312424183/701-9528081-9003530

[johnnie]

17. Thanks for the link

That looks like a funny read. I read the little excerpt..LOL. I will have to pick that one up. :thumbsup:

[raccoon]

12. I believe that for some people, high school was the high-water

mark of their lives.

Not me!

There are a few I wouldn't mind seeing again. Most of them I wouldn't want to. That was an unhappy time of my life. I'm not blaming my classmates for that, but it was just something I'd rather not remember.

Used to be the "conventional wisdom" was that "the high school years are the happiest time of your life." Sheesh--thank goodness that's not the popular perception now. My guess is that for a very small minority, that's true, but not for most.

[Left Is Write]

55. We saw a program when I was in 10th grade...

called "These Are The Greatest Days Of Your Life...So Far."

Part of the message was to make the most of high school, but not to be afraid that it was all downhill from there!

Junior high was so hideous for me that high school was a picnic in comparison. I had my ups and downs - lots of them - like most other teenagers, and high school was far from the highwater mark of my life.

However, out of the hundreds of kids I graduated with, there are quite a few I was fond of. Seeing them again at reunion time was nice.

[Shell Beau]

5. My 10 year reunion is coming up this spring.

I went to a very small private school. Only 40 people graduated with me. I am excited to see most of them. But of course there are a few I would rather not see!!

[Left_Winger]

8. And I thought my graduating class was small (52)...

I went to large public school until a major riot erupted one day which sent me running like a rabbit to a small Catholic school. Why a Catholic school? It was the only private school in Columbia, SC which did not discriminate against other people (except protestants, who had to pay twice the tuition. But is that discrimination?).

[Shell Beau]

9. I went to public school all the way through 9th grade.

But there was a lot of violence there and my parents got fed up with it. I went to a Christian school after that. I was the least discriminatory of the other private schools.

[Left_Winger]

34. Same here

The riot I experienced was in the 9th grade; and it was a biggie (police, tear gas, etc.)! However, in the early 70s there were only three choices in my city: the Catholics (the most open), the Episcopalians (the elitists) and the confederate flag-flying, "segregation forever" school (no way I was going there).

What is amazing about this is that I was an Episcopalian and their school would not accept me because of my long hair and that I would not belong to any of the "young gentleman" societies in town. (Shhh... promise not to tell anyone, but I was a hippie). So, it was the Catholics who provided me with a sanctuary from the violence and accepted me for who I was (I think it was because they needed the cash). For that I have been rather grateful my entire life.

[Shell Beau]

44. I am Episcopal too!

But long hair was a no-no at my school for the guys.

[Left_Winger]

59. What a coincidence

We're both from the deep south, Episcopalian... What else?

I have only one sibling, a sister (Episcopalians have on average 2.5 children); most (two out of every three) of the children in my generation and my parent's generation are female.

I notice you are from Mississippi. My cousin lives in Jackson and my mother's family lived in Hattiesburg during WWII as my grandfather was stationed at Camp Shelby (1942-46); and, this is the only place in Mississippi I have ever been. This area of Mississippi looked just like home to me: a lot of pine trees, sandy soil, etc.

Have you ever been to SC?

:hi:

BTW, the long hair came off when I joined the Marines in 1976.

[jane_pippin]

11. Wow , that's tiny!

I don't remember how many were in mine, but I remember the whole school was about 1500 students--it was a fun fact brought up regularly on the announcements, usually in connection with some new rule we'd all hate.

I'm happy you get to see people you actually want to see.

[Beware the Beast Man]

7. I have no real desire.

Most of my friends in school were either ahead or behind me in class. I had maybe two friends in my graduating class.

[tedoll78]

10. Two, three at the most.

The rest I could care less about.

[BigMcLargehuge]

13. There are several I would love to see again

but since I am a member of the cursed class of 1987 it's impossible without a Ouija board. Suicide seems most common, but a few have died while commercial fishing, driving, or from disease.

I still keep in contact with my best friend from his school, as he is still alive.

[Allenberg]

14. Really, the only one I cared about is dead.

My childhood best friend died in 2002. I really have no other connections to any of my friends from 1999 (year I graduated and joined the military) and earlier.

[jane_pippin]

16. .

I'm sorry for your loss Allenberg. :hug:

[XNASA]

15. I could have gone to a reunion last Saturday. I declined.

I even had an old classmate fly in from San Francisco and stay with us while he attended.....and I still didn't go.

I do have a lot of old friends though. Some I've known for 30 years. I see them often.

[RevCheesehead]

18. Nope.. I hated high school.

Besides, my best friend is dead, and the rest - well, we sort of keep in touch.

[Dora]

19. Yes, no, maybe.

There are people I would like to see, if only to say howdy and compare life paths. And there are people I would never want to see again.

The little groups that I belonged to are no longer together.

There is someone I ran into a few years ago, and we later had an okay lunch together, but I had no real desire to see her again. Awkwardly enough, I ran into her again at my obstetrician's office just last year. Sigh.

I skipped my ten-year reunion, and my twenty-year is coming up quick. I guess I better decide if I'm going to go or not.

I probably will, there are a couple of people I would be happy to see.

[WCGreen]

20. I have gone to all of my reunions....

Most of the time, we had a great visit... Our class was unique, in that I think 1975 was a special year....

Everyone was experimenting with drugs, well most everyone, the sexual revolution was still going on and we lived in a outside of the cliques....

And so there are about fifty or sixty people that I love to see every five years...

The others, I keep in lcose contact with whenever I get the chance...

I don't know, we put together an impromtu reunion this past August for our 30th... We invited a lot of people from the area...

It was fun.. We all got along... And at this time in our lives, we are pretty much done with trying to impress each other....

[Patiod]

37. I had the same experience, WCGreen

I've really enjoyed my reunions, even though high school was, as it is for many people, a mixed experience,

Enjoyed hanging out with folks, seeing pictures of their kids, hearing about their adventures and jobs. Sometimes the people I wasn't close to were some of the most interesting - I went to a rich suburban East Coast high school, and one girl is now a rancher's wife in Montana - how cool is that?

One very academic girl asked if I had been to see Springsteen's last tour, saying she remembered what a fanatic I had been. I had forgotten how far back my obsession went, and was shocked that one of the other "nerds" would have remembered something like that (and yes, I had been to see that tour, 25 years later...) Fun to get a glimpse of how you were viewed (vs. how you viewed yourself).

I don't really get the concept of writing off that phase of your life. I complain a lot about the tortures of being Irish Catholic at a largely-Jewish high school, but I went back and realized that a lot of the kids from back then that I complained about - jocks, nerds, stoners, popular and unpopular, Gentile & Jewish - have turned into really cool adults.

[WCGreen]

40. I sat with a whole mess of people I didn;t hang with in high

school at this last meeting.....

It was fun....

Of course I also talked to my posse....

[Patiod]

46. I hung out with the Jewish guys

who were the worst about torturing me about my weight and lack of a figure (I was really skinny back then). The guys I used to take detours to avoid.

They've turned into cool, funny, friendly adults, enthusiastic Dads, and (seemingly) happily married.

[ghostsofgiants]

21. I live with three of them...

And a lot of them go to the same school as I do, so I see them quite often. I suppose that's the result of living in a small area that's somewhat isolated. There's only one university in the province, so most people go there instead of leaving the province.

[SarahB]

22. Maybe one or two.

I didn't grow up in the town I lived in during high school, but moved there in 10th grade. Generally speaking, that time wasn't horrible, but it's done and it just doesn't matter. I went to my 10th reunion a few years back. :boring:

[jane_pippin]

25. Boring eh? Mine is in a year or two, assuming it even happens

(and I have my doubts that it will or that I'll even hear about it if it does.) I'm not going. They'll probably have it in the actual gym or a sports bar anyway and play "awsome" tunes from the 90's. The hell with that.

[I Have A Dream]

23. There are only a few people that I'd like to see again.

My husband has really fond feelings for most of his classmates, so he would enjoy any opportunity that he had to spend with them.

[Rabrrrrrr]

24. No, fuck 'em. Buncha useless uncreative ignorant assholes.

There's a couple that I stay in touch with, but otherwise, out of almost 500 of 'em, I couldn't give a goddamn if I ever saw any of 'em again, and I hope they are all leading the miserable, besodden, unfulfilled consumerist sports-addicted stupidity-heralding third-tier lives they deserve.

[jane_pippin]

29. You might like this book too:

It's called Home Land. It's a novel about a guy who is a "failure" and begins writing scathing updates to his alumni newsletter. It's very funny and a quick read:

http://www.amazon.ca/exec/obidos/ASIN/0312424183/701-95...

[devilgrrl]

26. I actually have friends from high school that I wasn't friends with then!!

One I started writing to on the classmates.com site before they made you pay to post messages. We barely acknowledged one another back then. I always figured that he was a nice guy, he was in the closet at the time and was treated rather poorly. He left a snarky message specifically aimed at the serial assholes. So I dropped him a note stating that I thought he was nice cat. He appreciated it and we've been mates since. :-)

[LynneSin]

27. I'd rather see a raging case of Herpes on me

Seriously!

[malta blue]

28. I would rather endure chinese water torture

than rest my eyes on anyone I went to high school with. My 20th is in 2006 and I will NOT be attending.

[xmas74]

30. I wish about 90% of them would disappear.

I went to my class reunion a few years back. Not worth it. I got drunk and told everyone off.
Felt just like high school and I hated high school.

[bikebloke]

31. Perhaps in a fly-on-the-wall situation

Just to see how they aged. Last year, this over weight middle-aged bloke came up to me. Turns out we were in junior high and high school together. I did know him in later years when we both ran orienteering in the same club. But it still had been over 20 years.

On the Internet, I came across the photo of a girl I sort of fancied in high school. She turned into an old lady.

All in all, I've had better memories of folk later in my life. I find it rather pathetic that high school was the peak in life.

[DS1]

32. Just one of the girls, Kate

She was a real sweet girl, I named my rifle in bootcamp after her. Kate and I shot 1st place :loveya:


bwaahahahaha

[miss_kitty]

33. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I hated them then, I'd hate them now.

[bbernardini]

35. Absolutely! Just saw one this past Sunday.

I still try to keep in touch with a number of my high school friends, even 13 years later. One even teaches in a school down the street from where I teach.

[Deja Q]

36. Maybe two...

One turned out not to be gay (in retrospect, a few years ago, I thought he was hitting on me - after contacting him he was getting married...)

The other I want to, but as I'm about to lose my job, never mind my declining health, I'm too ashamed.

[jane_pippin]

42. Don't let that stop you...

those things are beyond your control and nothing to be ashamed of. Of course, I don't know you and don't claim to know what it's like to be in your shoes, but I can see where you're coming from. Maybe reaching out to an old friend will do you good.

:hug:

[kmla]

38. Yep. Just went to my 25th high school reunion last month.

High school was OK. I liked the people, and they mostly liked me. I was a class smartass/jokester (but not in a bad way.)

I like to go to see if I have either put on the most weight, or lost the most hair. So far, I am not close to first in either category.

Had a good time and actually enjoyed it.

[chaska]

39. I got back together with a friend I hadn't seen in 20 years...

We were best friends for 13 years, played in several bands together, etc. I turned out for an audition a couple of years ago and lo and behold who was on bass but my old buddy. Talk about yer basic weird though, that is a shock to the system when that happens.

I got the gig and we started to get friendly again, but he had already made plans to join another band. When he left that meant the only good player in the band was me, so I left too.

Bottom line: Our renewed friendship didn't take. We are estranged again.

Actually, he kept spamming me with these stupid win a free meal here, there and everywhere (places you couldn't pay me to eat at - Applebees, Red Lobster, etc.), so I finally had to block his emails. To be clear, that was all he sent, no personal messages at all - he put me on his email list and forgot about me (I hate that kind of anonymous correspondence). Big church going, business man type, you understand.

[AirmensMom]

41. Not at all!

Haven't gone to a single reunion in 31 years and don't intend to. It was the worst time of my life.

[youthere]

53. Amen to that!

What Airmen's mom said.

[taterguy]

43. of course

Best friend from high school just directed a succesful indie flick. We run into each other every couple of years and it's always fun. I confess I enjoy meeting some of his famous friends.

[Meatwad]

45. I think it'd be nice to see them again.

For one time.

I haven't seen most of them since I graduated from high school five years ago.

[flamingyouth]

47. My 20th reunion is next year

I admit, I'm curious. Perhaps it's morbid curiosity, but nonetheless.

I only see about three or four people from high school any more.

[Arugula Latte]

48. I keep in touch w/ a few people. That's about all I care to see.

I went to my 5th reunion and two seconds after walking in I had a wave of revulsion wash over me: "Oh yes. This is why I hated high school." I haven't been to one since -- just missed the 20th reunion (well, 21st, because the person organizing it was about a year too late.)

At least I got a good education out of the place.

[LeftyMom]

49. See how? On fire, on America's Most Wanted? Yes.

Just run into somebody at the mall? Hell no. I didn't like those people then, why would I want to run into them and have a few minutes of awkward "catch up" chit chat?

Thankfully I live across town, so I do't run into people that often. A few years ago, I saw my best friend from my school years, she's gone downhill badly. Damned if I know what she was on but in a few years she'd gone from a full ride at a good school to to scrubbing toilets for a living and living on some near-stranger's couch. It was really very sad. :crying:

[jane_pippin]

54. Ok, first of all:

:rofl:

and second, that's too bad about your old friend. Something like that happened to one of my good friends too, and it just breaks the old heart a bit.

[Left Is Write]

50. Yes, sure.

My crowd from high school is scattered across the state and country, and we don't hang out anymore (but my best bud is still one of my oldest and dearest friends, even though 1500 miles separate us). One of the people I wanted to see in particular at my 20-year reunion last year WAS there, but not for long, and I didn't get around to catching up with him.

I saw lots of people I was fond of and was very happy to see. I hope it's not ten or twenty years before I see them again.

[terrya]

51. Fuck, no.

And let's just leave it at that.

[HEAVYHEART]

52. I wish. But I don't have any high school classmates

I dropped out in 7th grade. I got my GED early and went to college after that.

[grace0418]

56. Only one or two, but no one else. High school sucked ASS.

I actually do see a girl I went to high school with fairly often because she's married to a coworker and good friend of mine. She's really nice but we weren't close in high school, so if I hadn't met her again through my friend I wouldn't have given it much thought. I would like to see my old friend Janice, but don't know where she's living. And my best friend from high school is nice but we have nothing in common anymore. So as much as I wish her well and hope she has a great life, I can't really see us having a connection now.

Other than that I pretty much hated every minute of high school and couldn't wait to graduate. I didn't go to my ten year reunion and have no plans to go to my twentieth. I guess there's a teensy weensy bit of me that would like to see all the people I hated in high school and whether or not they became the losers I imagine they would've, but it's not a strong enough desire to be worth the effort.

College was where I made life-long friends (including my husband) and many, many fond memories.

[youspeakmylanguage]

57. Couldn't care less...

...if I tried.

[Nikia]

58. I live a few states away

As a result, I don't see anyone who I went to high shcool with. Of the couple times I have visited my family in that area, I have not made a point of seeing anyone. I did recognize a couple of aquaintances on those visits as service workers in businesses we went into. I opted to remain anonymous though and didn't say or do anything to suggest that I recognized them. They didn't acknowledge me as anyone that they knew either. Perhaps it is better that way.
Still, my high school days were part of who I am. That community is also. It has been long enough though that I don't have any special attatachment to even people who I considered my closest friends. Sometimes, out of sight, out of mind is easier.