Sometimes I forget the nationality of my child.

[Bouncy Ball]

Thank God for clothing like this!



Also, I'm glad they have baby announcements like this so EVERYONE WILL KNOW THE CHILD WAS NOT CONCEIVED ABROAD!!!



I'm proud to live in a country where I can give my child the American flag right out of a bottle.



And just for extra measure, SUCK ON THAT AMERICAN PACIFIER!!!



It's such a comfort to know I can wrap my baby up as tightly in the flag as I want to!



Not even SLIGHTLY non-American, so don't even THINK it, buster!



Hey, use the flag as a blanket!



Eh, if she chokes on the beads, that's ok, AS LONG AS EVERYONE KNOWS HOW INCREDIBLY AMERICAN SHE IS!!!





I saved the best for last:

[AwakeAtLast]

1. And the best part - it's all MADE IN CHINA!!!

Thanks for the post. I am recommending. :hi:

[madeline_con]

2. When Baby poops on the flag...

can Mommy and Daddy be arrested for desecrating it? :evilgrin:

[YOY]

22. Only if...

The baby was not a red-blooded-american-patriot-child!

We all know that all real Americans excrete pleasant rose smelling feces! Ask a freeper!

[Droopy]

3. Are you suggesting that maybe that red, white and blue

"Barbie Goes To War" toy Hummer might not be a cool idea for my niece for a gift?

[Bouncy Ball]

5. Well, uh, I mean.

Uh....hell no!!!!

Do you mean this?

[Bouncy Ball]

6. I googled Barbie goes to war and got this:

[Droopy]

7. Yeah, I was just being a goof ball

[Bouncy Ball]

8. I know, I was just scared by that google image!

:scared:

Eeek! And that Hummer! :rofl:

[blondeatlast]

28. Liberty now holds a sickle and VACUUM CLEANER?

That is disturbing, to say the least.

What's with that expression?

[Shell Beau]

29. Ahhhh! Scary!

[Bucky]

4. You know, even Republican babies are cute.

That said, the "Old Glory" diapers is obviously the next step. We need that flag anti-desecration law STAT!

[Maddy McCall]

9. Ok, here's my rant, and it's aimed at all baby announcements.

WTF do you list the length? Weight, ok...I can understand. But, when you add length, is that supposed to make the recipient of the announcement say, "Oh WOW that is one tall baby for his weight!" Or "That baby sure is short and stubby to weigh 8 lbs. 6 oz. He really should weigh closer to 8lb. 2oz. to be 21 1/2 inches tall. That's one stocky baby!"

I just never understood the length thing.

[Bouncy Ball]

10. Eh, I guess it's just a stock statistic.

With our daughter, it was so people could say "NINE pounds and barely 20 inches long! My God, she's a sausage!"

:rofl:

I say that now because she's been tiny for her size since about 18 months old. I don't know why she was such a huge baby.

[Maddy McCall]

11. Whoa! Nine pounds.

She was a big baby! :D

[Lilyhoney]

14. How much volume does your baby displace?

Nobody ever asks that.

[Maddy McCall]

16. What is your baby's velocity?

No one ever asks that, either. LOL! :hi:

[ulysses]

21. LOL!

:D

[Misunderestimator]

26. More importantly, how much volume does your baby dispense?

:)

[Spider Jerusalem]

12. That birth announcement is trying too hard.

"Jackson Tyler-Edwin Moroz"? :wtf:


From The Patriot's Handbook: "Real Americans give their kids trendy, whitebread, Anglo-Saxon names...regardless of their ethnic heritage."

[mohinoaklawnillinois]

13. Well according to the Patriot's Handbook then my grandnephews

aren't American: they're named Ryan, Colin and Liam respectively.

And as for my friends American born kids forget it: What would they think of Sean, Declan, Noeleen, Seamus, Blaithin, Roisin, Ronan, Cailin, Sinead, Siobhan, etc, etc.

To the author of the Patriot's Handbook: bite me!!!

[AlienGirl]

15. Nationalism scares me

:scared:

[gmoney]

17. "Hunny, is lil' Jeb Canadian or what?"

I keep fergettin...

[NMMNG]

18. BouncyBall, you never fail to amuse me

BTW, that 4th of July 2003 baby is well on the way to becoming centerfold material--s/he already has the pose down. :*

edited for typo

[rucky]

19. God Hates Flags

isn't that what fred phelps always says?

[tenshi816]

20. So funny!

She looks slightly embarrassed in that first photograph.

[FSogol]

23. Quick, time to market disposal flag diapers.

;)

[MountainLaurel]

30. Already here

Wal-mart sold them a few years ago, in the all-jingoism-all-the-time rush after 9-11.

[jmm]

33. You can even get flag diapers for your dog

Of course no patriotic pooch would dare go out without its underwear, tie, scarf, belly band, necklace ensemble.

[GOPisEvil]

24. It's like the whole country has gone "Texan".

Texans are notorious for bragging in this sort of fashion.

[frictionlessO]

25. Damn nationalistic jingoistic pride turned the flag into a fad.

These kinds of thing just piss me off no end. The flag is a symbol worthy of respect, not unending comsumeristic rip offs! I guees some people are actually so under endowed in true patriotism they resort to these to biggin' up their already to large egos.

[Paradise]

27. without a doubt,

the BEST POST i've ever had the pleasure... THANKS! :kick:

[El Fuego]

31. Actually, if traveling abroad it's best that they don't know

Thanks to bush. People hate us, you know. They actually sell kits now to U.S. travelers so they can pass themselves off as Canadians.

[jmm]

32. It's never too early to talk to your child into enlisting

If you haven't been to the gym since you gave birth

[Inland]

34. Can you buy a bib with a Selective Service number? nt

[Inland]

35. Are there diapers with his share of the national debt at birth? nt