Tell me if this seems unreasonable of me.

[LostInAnomie]

Tomorrow, I am supposed to help my girlfriends parents move out of their house at 10am. Since I live an hour away from them I have to get up at 8:15 to get ready, and then drive there. For me 8:15 is VERY early because I work thirds and usually don't get to go to bed until 5:45. Since Saturday is the only day I get to sleep in I asked my girlfriend if it is ok if I didn't show up until about 1pm -which is still earlier than I like to get up- and then help with the heavier items.

When she heard my request she starts ranting and laying a guilt trip on me about how unreasonable I am being, and how I need to quit being a baby. I felt like telling her "Until you work thirds shut the hell up" but I didn't. I'm still not going to show up until 1:00 though.

[_testify_]

1. hell no

I'm the same way...I dont work nights but I do work 60 hours over 6 days and nobody messes with my day off.


NOBODY.

[enigmatic]

2. Nope

Not unreasonable; I understand your side completely.

[Rabrrrrrr]

3. She is being unreasonable

She asked for your help - you said that you will help, but you set a time for when you can help.

It is unreasonable for her to both ask you to help AND demand the time that you show up.

I would consider it also an issue of safety - if you have to go on two hours of sleep, and your drive is an hour to get there, that's not very safe. She's asking you, basically, to put your safety at risk, and she's also telling you that she doesn't care about your health (she doesn't care if you get enough sleep).

[enigmatic]

7. That's a great point

The safety issue absolutely right; nobody's going to be alert after 2 hours of sleep and driving another hour..

[fleabert]

4. Show up at 1 with snacks and coffee,

you are in no way being unreasonable. It's a favor, she needs to get over herself, she's lucky you are helping in the first place.

People who have never worked an overnight shift have no clue what it's like. I used to get calls at 9am (got off at 7am and went to sleep at 8) from my family and they would routinely say, with heaps of judgement: 'Are you still asleep?!?" Same thing happens now with me living on the West Coast...my family in Central time calls at 6am "why are you still in bed? It's 8 in the morning?" Um- I go to bed at about 1am, it's not 8 here dumbass! It's SIX O'CLOCK!

[lenidog]

5. She is being totally unreasonable

You told her you would help and you told her when you could help. It pretty damn unreasonable of her to expect you to work a full shift then get two hours sleep and then start moving boxes and furniture for probably and entire day.

[MrScorpio]

6. When you doze off and hit another car head-on, let's hear her rant then

Get some freaking sleep

Mom and pop should understand

[JohnnyCougar]

8. No way....

Tell her to pick you up if she wants you to come so bad. Then you can sleep on the ride there.

Or just put it in analogy form. Ask her if she would get up at 2am to help your parents move...

[LostInAnomie]

11. I tried that.

She goes to bed at around 11pm and I asked her "How would you like it if you had to get up at 1:30 to help someone move?", she was unphased.

What makes it worse is that her lazy ass sister and her lazy ass sister's fiance aren't even going to help, and they only live 25 minutes away.

I hate helping people move.

[enigmatic]

14. And she's ragging on you?

Nice. Why aren't they helping?

[LostInAnomie]

15. Because they are lazy, self-centered, asses.

They will probably show up after everything is moved out and act disappointed that they couldn't help.

[enigmatic]

16. Oh, I've seen that before...

That sucks. I'd just show up at 1 ready to help; if she's pissed but won't get her sister and brother to help, oh well.

[JohnnyCougar]

17. Rats...logic doesn't work on her...

oh wait, she's a girl...nevermind...why was I thinking that in the first place!
;)

You got the next step right. Just do what you think you should do....which is get some decent sleep. It's all a game. Girls ask you to do unreasonable stuff just to see how much control they have gained over you.

[Madrone]

9. I see this a little differently -

First - it is NOT unreasonable to wish to show up at one. That's very fair, and reasonable.

However:

You're supposed to be there at 10. Sounds like you've already committed to 10, and they are expecting you to be there then? If you told them you'd be there, then changed your mind and left your girlfriend to explain why you bailed - that's kinda unreasonable.

[LostInAnomie]

12. No, I didn't find out what time I am "supposed" to be there...

... until about 10pm tonight.

[Madrone]

13. Well alrighty then....

:)

No unreasonableness found here. Move along - nothing to see...


Shit - they'e lucky you're cool with 1. Moving SUCKS.

[Tsiyu]

10. "Being a baby"

Babies don't work all night long. They lay in their cribs and sleep.

So no, you are not being unreasonable. Take care of yourself, because no one else will ( unless you are the Prophetess and your SO spontaneously rubs your feet......*sudden attack of self pity*)