Can allergies prevent somebody from getting drafted?

[Deja Q]

Or a plate in one's head or throat?

How about a bunion, hemorrhoids, or a missing brain?

[mike_c]

1. I'm allergic to authority....

I did not do well in the military....

[Reverend_Smitty]

2. well a pilonidal cyst

kept Oxyrush out of action, but I'm thinking next time around being blind or paraplegic won't keep you out :scared:

All I know is if they come for me I think I'll come down with a sudden case of "the gays", the only sure fire way to get your ass out of combat...silly isn't it?

[Deja Q]

5. Well, if you need gay training, just give me a holler...

I'm a tried and tested true tinkerbell. A haplessly happy homo. A real flaming f... well, you get the idea. :7 :7 :7

[Reverend_Smitty]

7. I might need the training from the ladies...

I've heard on the grapevine that they give you a toaster when you switch to their team. Any truth to that rumor? :P

[Deja Q]

8. Oops. Sorry, I didn't look. Of course, if I did look, wouldn't that be

considered rude? O8)

LOL.

Yeah, you lot get toasters. We men get pamphlets and condoms, and the pamphlets aren't about creating doggie balloons. Of course, with * in charge that might change...

[Reverend_Smitty]

9. no problem, it happens all the time...

I currently own a toaster, but when mine goes on the blink...it's nice to know that if I reconsider my sexual orientation, I'll get a replacement...you gays are a-ok in my book! lol :toast:

[MissMarple]

10. So.... are you any good at shopping?

There are desperate women out here who could use A LITTLE HELP! Thank you very much. :evilgrin:

[MissMarple]

13. Actually, I was responding to post #5.

:-)

[havocmom]

3. Being old and having cancer doesn't seem to deter them right off

[brainshrub]

4. I'm allergic to fast-moving bullets.

And the whole "pissing-my-life-away-for-oil" thing doesn't appeal to me either.

[sniffa]

6. i'm LegaLLy deaf

one partiaL working ear. i've heard that doesn't/won't disquaLify you this time around.... but what do i know.

[Mojambo]

11. Your thread makes me think of these lyrics

Draft Dodger Rag

I'm just a typical American boy from a typical American town
I believe in God and Senator Dodd and keeping old Castro down
And when it came my time to serve I knew better dead than red
But when I got to my old draft board, buddy, this is what I said:

Sarge, I'm only eighteen, I got a ruptured spleen
And I always carry a purse
I got eyes like a bat, my feet are flat, and my asthma's
getting worse
Oh think of my career, my sweetheart dear, and my poor old
invalid aunt
Besides, I ain't no fool, I'm a goin' to school, and I'm
working in a defense plant

I've got a dislocated disc and a racked up back
I'm allergic to flowers and bugs
And when the bombshell hits, I get epileptic fits
And I'm addicted to a thousand drugs
I got the weakness woes, and I can't touch my toes
I can hardly reach my knees
And if the enemy came close to me
I'd probably start to sneeze

(chorus)

I hate Chou En Lai, and I hope he dies,
but one thing you gotta see
That someone's gotta go over there
and that someone isn't me
So I wish you well, Sarge, give 'em Hell
Yeah, Kill me a thousand or so
And if you ever get a war without blood and gore
Well I'll be the first to go

[eyepaddle]

12. Here's a parallel discussion--not that I'm a complete authority

or anything....

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=3233454&mesg_id=3233454

Do you guys want me to check it out? I'll do ANYTHING for the lounge!











































Well, not really! :evilgrin: