I CAN'T FIND MY BUTT WITH BOTH HANDS!!!

[leftofthedial]

HELP!!

[Dookus]

1. calm down

here's what you do....

place your hands on your face. Bend over and kiss your own ass. The thing that's not your face - that's your ass. Move your hands towards it. Viola.

[leftofthedial]

3. Oh thank god

bless you dookus

I found my tookus

[KitchenWitch]

8. oh man

:rofl:

that is fine poetry!

[leftofthedial]

19. ah, high art

of the low rhyme

[punpirate]

2. What happened? Did you get too close...

... to Dubya and some of him rub off on you? :)

[leftofthedial]

4. I'm a victim of the no fool left behind initiative

[Skittles]

5. need a flashlight, lefty?

I WILL KICK YOUR ASS TO HELP YOU FIND IT

[leftofthedial]

6. You'd probably kick my ass even if it wouldn't help me find it

What kind of crack is that?

:)

[ET Awful]

10. Are you sure you meant to say "crack"?

:evilgrin:

[leftofthedial]

11. we better stop this

before the hole gets any deeper

Is that a cheeky comment?

[JohnnyRingo]

7. I can't help. I'm trying to figure out how I got shoe polish on my hands

....I'm not even sure if it's Shinola, or what the hell it is.

[leftofthedial]

12. eewwwwwwwww!

I love scataogical humor.

[Seabiscuit]

9. That's OK. I can't see my butt with both eyeballs. Not that I'd want to.

Except perhaps to make sure my head's not up it.

[leftofthedial]

13. If you want to know whether your heads up it or not,

all you need to do is start a religion thread on GD and someone will be glad to tell you.

[Seabiscuit]

31. If I were to start a religion thread I'd be the first to tell me my head's

up my butt.

[BikeWriter]

14. Can you find it with one hand?

[leftofthedial]

20. hell, I can find it

with one finger I bet

[BikeWriter]

27. Hee hee hee! :-)

[Crankie Avalon]

15. Did you check on top of your shoulders?

Just trying to be helpful. O8)

[Arkana]

16. HAHA U DUMM LIBRUL

U DUMM LIBRULS COLD NEVVER FIND YORE BUTS WITH TOO HANDS! LOLOLOLOL! FREEPERS IS THA SMRT!

:P I did tell you to stay away from Freeperville--you're just lucky you didn't contract "Ass From Elbow" Disease.

[leftofthedial]

21. Is it curable, Doctor?

Will I ever play the sousaphone again?

[Arkana]

26. Well, with healthy doses of AAR and a bit of time spent on DU

you should be right as rain in no time!

[peekaloo]

17. Can you pour piss out of a boot?

[leftofthedial]

22. well not if the instructions are printed on the

oh never mind

how did all that piss get inthe boot in the first place, I always wondered

[DS1]

18. Stand up.

[leftofthedial]

24. okay

but it's gonna cost you extra

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

23. Just follow your head!

[leftofthedial]

28. hey!

you've been spying on me!

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

29. It's a dirty job, but

someone has to do it!

:toast:

[Texasgal]

25. And your screen name is

Left of the dial? How do you know if it's left? I mean...assuming that you can;t find your butt with both hands.... and a road map.

heh heh.... Just kidding! :P

[leftofthedial]

30. Left and right I can deal with

it up down and around that are giving me trouble.

[MrScorpio]

32. You need to hire a Buttfinder

I'm sure you find one on the Internet

[VOX]

33. Can you distinguish your ass from third base, or a hole in the ground?

If so, all is not lost! :hi: