I am so upset about my hair cut

[Nikia]

We went to my inlaws for Easter weekend. My husband's mother offered to pay for our hair cuts if we went to her stylist while we there. I have needed my ends trimmed for a couple of months as did my husband. She took us there while I was still tired and had nothing to eat or drink. I was wearing glasses so I took them off for the hair cut and am pretty blind without correction. This woman says that I need at least 2 inches taken off, which was not too horrible. Then she says that my hair needs long layers because I have thin hair (I always thought of my hair as thick). I tell her specifically that I don't want short layers and that I put my hair back for work. Then she starts cutting and keeps cutting. I am not seeing any of this, but get the feeling that something is wrong but feel powerless to say anything. When I put my glasses back on, I want to cry. My hair was a few inches below my shoulder, one length, that I spent 3 years growing to get the layers out. Now the longest layer is at my shoulder. The top layer is only a few inches long and I can't get it in a pony tale. The layers don't even seem to be cut straight. My hair is naturually curly, but the curl is uneven. My curls are whipping out every which way. My goal was long beuatiful hair, which now probably won't happen until I am old. My mother-in-law claims to like my hair and said that the reason that she liked the stylist so much is that "She knows what needs to be done better than the customer and goes for it."
This happened on Saturday and I am still upset. I feel as though I was violated without my consent or something. I could complain about this to my therapist, but her hair is very similiar to my hair cut and she would probably be offended.
I suppose that there is nothing that I can do now. Is there anything that I can do to make my hair grow faster? Is there a good strategy for getting the layers out as it grows keeping with my goal of long hair.

[aQuArius]

1. I am SO sorry...

I can feel your pain. I have long straight hair myself and I just go to Pro-Cuts and don't pay a lot for an all-one-length trim. I make sure I am facing forward the entire time. The last time I turned my back (in a high-priced salon), it got whacked and I vowed to never let that happen again. Again, I am soooooo sorry.

[Nikia]

7. Why do stylists want to impose their will onto to customers?

Personally, I think the majority of stylists have odd looking hair cuts. Especially when they are working with a new customer, the customer knows her hair better than anyone. Hair to many women is a big part of our self image. We know how we want to look. If I did not know how I wanted to look or wanted to be adventuress, I would have told her. It is not nice to cut off too much hair without a customer's consent. The stylist might think that the cut is cute, but they don't have to live with it.
I think that I'll stick with the cheaper chains. Most of the stylists there are relatively new in the career and afraid of being fired. The stylist who cut my hair owned a partnership with another stylist.
Thanks for your sympathy. I am sorry about your earlier experience.

[BlueJazz]

2. I don't believe there's much you can do...

...as far as, making your hair grow faster...BUT if it will make you feel
any better I'll get some of the Big Guys from DU and we'll all go burn her stinking shop down!

[physioex]

3. Sorry this happened

You shouldn't have gone to the other hair cutter if you were so sensitive about your hair.

[Lex]

4. I was thinking that too. I'm totally sensitive about my hair

and it's taken me 3 years to get this one hairdresser to cut it like I want it. I'd never go anywhere else or I just know I'd be pissed.

[physioex]

8. I am wondering...

Why is it that you and that original poster take so long to grow hair? I am a male with straight hair and my hair grows very quickly. So much so that I have to have it cut once a month.

[Lex]

9. Sorry, I didn't say my hair grows slowly.

It grows quite fast actually and I get it cut about every 6 weeks.

[Nikia]

15. I suppose it depends on your target length

If you only want your hair to be a couple inches, you could go bald and have it be long enough for you within a relatively short period of time. If you had your hair cut to a couple inches, but want it to be a couple feet, it is going to take a longer time to reach the desired length. Curly hair looks and hangs shorter than it is if you pull it straight too and therefore it takes longer to reach the desired length.

[physioex]

17. Yes that makes sense.....

And this is probably more true for African Americans.

[amazona]

5. nothing makes hair grow faster

Since you have thick, curly hair, you could probably get hair extensions for a reasonable price. I have never had a good hair cut in my life and as my hair is fine, I'm told the price of hair extensions is $3,000 ... per month!

Life is unfair.

The conservation movement is a breeding ground of communists
and other subversives. We intend to clean them out,
even if it means rounding up every birdwatcher in the country.
--John Mitchell, US Attorney General 1969-72

[Nikia]

11. I suppose that I could look into that

I had never considered that before. I can't afford too much.
$3,000/month for hair extension? How much would a good wig be?

[amazona]

13. less than that, a lot less but wigs are too hot

Hair sucks. :-(

The conservation movement is a breeding ground of communists
and other subversives. We intend to clean them out,
even if it means rounding up every birdwatcher in the country.
--John Mitchell, US Attorney General 1969-72

[swag]

6. Hi, Nikia

I'm sorry that this happened. How rotten. I hope you feel better soon.

I find that Amino Acid supplements make my fingernails and hair grow much faster, but I haven't tested this under laboratory conditions.

And you should check for deleterious side effects before taking these pills. And never take a ton of this shit - one pill a day of an amino acid complex is more than enough.

I take an "Amino 50" supplement daily, for reasons of my own. Amino acids have other benefits as well.

I'm not a big fan of supplements and I loathe naturopathic claims (sorry, DU - I'm a Skeptical Inquirer subscriber), but moderate daily doses of Amino acids may help you out.

Don't bum too hard on that hair, 'kay?

[Nikia]

18. I'll look into that

My diet has been suffering a bit lately so I don't think that it could hurt in moderation, especially if I look out for side effects.
I'll try to settle down now.

[Lauri16]

10. holy crap

I feel so bad for you.

I'm thinking that your mother-in-law should have told you "She knows what needs to be done better than the customer and goes for it." before you sat in the chair. Hair stylists are not there to do what they think is best. They're supposed to do what you want.

I'm very sensitive when it comes to my hair, too. I've been going to the same person for the last 8 years. No one else goes near my hair.

[Lone_Star_Dem]

12. Bad haircuts suck.

I've had them and lived through the "it'll grow back" and "it's just hair", and the famous "it looks good on you, it brings out your eyes". It really ticks you off when you're walking around looking like someone attacked you with a weed-whacker.

Can you have it evened out at your stylist? I know it'll only make it shorter but at least it would be a good cut. It can make a difference.

I'm sorry you had this happen to you.

[FreedomFry]

14. I suffered through adolescence with awful hair

Every time my hair started looking decent, my parents made me chop it off, or get a permanent, or something else embarrassing and ugly. My stepfather was a hair stylist, so when the scissors, rollers and tall chair came out, I had no choice.

So I really do understand how you feel.

And by the way, there is no such thing as knowing better than the customer. I deal with clients every day, and if I didn't listen to them, I wouldn't be working.

Hang in there, Nikia.

[tinfoilinfor2005]

16. naturally, now I'm curious...

do you have any before and after pics? I know that's not the point, but a visual would be helpful.

[SheilaT]

19. No one deserves to have

her hair chopped off like that.

Do get the cut fixed by your regular stylist as soon as you can. Don't live with a cut you hate any longer than you can help. I realize when it got cut much shorter than you wanted, your inclination will be not to let a scissors near it for the next two years or so. But resist that impulse. Get it shaped into a style you can live with and can let continue to grow out.

It took me until I was 40 to realize that regular trims are truly a girl's best friend, and it's possible for my hair to look good all the time but only by getting it trimmed regularly. AND it's possible to cut it short and grow it long and still get it trimmed regularly and look good all the while.

No stylist truly worth the name will impose her own vision on a customer. Instead, the stylist will work with the customer and the hair type to get a good result.

Hang in there. It really will grow out.

[lavenderdiva]

20. Hey, Nikia

I'm sooo sorry this happened to you! 3 years ago, I was getting married and had a definite idea of how I wanted my hair to be for the wedding. Of course, the idea was an up-do, and when I started planning it, my hair wasn't quite long enough to put up. My hairdresser suggested I start taking both Kelp and Biotin. Kelp is actually iodine, and I took 2 150mcg tablets daily. Biotin is a fundamental part of both your hair and nails. I took 2 600mcg tablets daily. Within a few months, I was able to have my up-do and look the way I envisioned on my wedding day. I got both of these supplements at my local GNC store, and they weren't very expensive. I'm not saying this is a miracle cure or anything, just a natural 'nudge' to help speed the growth process along... Good luck!