20 Best Excuses for Calling in Sick

[davidinalameda]

http://msn.careerbuilder.com/Custom/MSN/CareerAdvice/458.htm?siteid=cbmsnhp4443&sc_extcmp=JS_wi2_jan05_home1>1=6272&cbRecursionCnt=1&cbsid=9f95b9f1adb245d8a3e7a8ea4fa5cb96-164903724-xo-2

I've only used one--the cat unplugged my alarm clock

[pstans]

1. Here is the best excuse for not going to work

Say you have Rectal Glaucoma. You just couldn't see your ass coming into work today.

[DS1]

4. hehehhee, I like that one

:D

[Bok_Tukalo]

2. Best excuse I've ever heard used:

"My llama died."

[mac56]

3. One of my dad's employees called in sick one day.

Dad: "You don't sound sick."
Employee: "You don't sound like a doctor."

[GOPBasher]

5. LOL. I must say that's kind of funny. n/t

[davidinalameda]

6. Dad--you don't sound like you have a job anymore

[mac56]

7. hee hee!

You always get the good comebacks when it's too late.

[Worst Username Ever]

8. The voices are telling me to stay home

[amber dog democrat]

9. I am just not myself today.

I have actually used that one on a job I was quitting.

[latteromden]

10. My favorite "calling in to work" joke:

"If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work: 'Hello. Can't work today, still queer.'" - Robin Tyler

[davidinalameda]

11. but I work in San Francisco

that won't work here

[RedCloud]

12. My wife is going to have a baby!

Boss: Boy or girl?
RC: Let you know 9 and 1/2 months from now!

[davidinalameda]

14. bravo!

that's the best one I've heard

[qnr]

13. I've used that skunk one. Actually, my dog got sprayed, and it

was transferred to me.

[wideopen]

15. I swear

One of my employees of about 6 years called in one morning as said he would be late because his wife wanted to have sex. What could I say? I always tell them NEVER lie to me about anything,and he didn't.
I said "Have fun,see you after lunch"

[funkybutt]

16. My erection has lasted 4 hours. n/t

[UncleSepp]

17. Actual called in sick reasons from me

Can't come in, my parking lot is flooded
Can't come in, there's no water in my house and I don't think I should come in without having a shower (twice)
Can't come in, there's an air ambulance in my parking lot and a wrecked boat in the street

All of these really happened, in the first two weeks of a new job. I am amazed I kept that job. :-D

[Floogeldy]

18. My dog chewed up my car keys

B-)

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

19. You think you have your "sick voice" down really good and

you just want to see if it really works over the phone.