At what age did you lose a parent?

[madison2000]

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

1. I was a month short of 21 when I lost Dad

And 24 when I lost Mom.

[madison2000]

2. I talked to a friend this morning whose ex is dying of cancer

her youngest son is 17 and having a hard time with it... has seen his father lose over 100 lbs.

I was 35 when my dad died.

[forgethell]

3. I'm 56

and still have both parents. Dad's 85, Mom's 78. What a go, Mom & Dad!!!:) :) :)

[MuseRider]

4. Lost my Dad at 19

my mother at 42 and my brothers at 44 and 49. Not a lot of longevity in my family.

[indepat]

5. Mom is 91, Dad will be 93 Wednesday

[madison2000]

18. congrats

you're a lucky one!

[outraged2]

6. I was four

My dad was in the USAF and "died when his plane struck the ground".

[Bridget Burke]

11. My dad's plane struck a mountain....

But I was four, as well.

Don't remember him, but I've got the flag he wore to his wake. One reason I've got low tolerance for the Red White & Blue as decor, apparel & Republican propaganda.

[outraged2]

14. That's odd

That's what happened to my dad too.... What kind of plane was your dad in? (If you don't mind me asking) F111f for mine.

[Bridget Burke]

28. It was an RB-36.

The reconnaissance model of the B-36 bomber. (Strategic Air Command.)

For comparison, here's a '36 next to a B-29; the B-29 is on the left.

[ronnykmarshall]

7. I lost my dad when I was 41 in 2002.

My mom lost her father when she was 28.

[dog_lovin_dem]

8. I was 23 when my dad died

and 24 when my mom passed. Definately a tough couple of years.

[Freebird12004]

10. Welcome to DU dog_lovin_dem

:hug:

[Freebird12004]

9. Dad passed away when I was 24

He suffered a fatal heart attack when he was 52. I don't know anything about my mother except that she would be 80 if she's still alive.

[sinkingfeeling]

12. I was 41 when my Dad died in 1989. Mom is going on 86 and was

just diagnosed with breast cancer.

[prozacnation]

13. I was 23

My Mom died of pancreatic/liver cancer in 1991 when she was 54. It was very fast and horrible. My brother and I took care of her until the end. I miss her terribly.

[guinivere]

15. My mom died in '72

I was in 8th grade. Then my dad died in '82.

[El Fuego]

16. My parents both died relatively young

Of lung cancer because they were heavy smokers. I don't smoke, so I am hoping that the same won't happen to me.

[NNadir]

17. I was 23 when my mom died, early 40's when my dad died.

I had to take care of my Mom. My stepmother (my dad's wonderful second wife) took care of him, though I helped as much as I could.

I still miss both my parents, especially since I became a father myself after both passed on.

[baldguy]

19. My mom died last October.

[madison2000]

71. sorry to hear it

:hug:

[B Calm]

20. Mom died of cancer at 49, dad is 88 and hates Bush with a passion.

[Ernesto]

21. Before I was born

He was a Chief Petty Officer in the "good War" (wwII).

[GoddessOfGuinness]

58. That must've been rough...

My heart aches for the children who've lost a parent for the sake of oil.

[Bertha Venation]

22. My mother was 33, I was 11.

Suicide. :shrug: At least none of us kids found her.

[Misunderestimator]

39. I'm so sorry, Bertha...

That must have been awful... :hug:

[Lauri16]

23. Re: "At what age did you lose a parent?"

My father died 5 months before I was born & my Mom died this past August.

[Blue_In_AK]

24. My mother was killed in a car accident when I was 8...

My father died in 1994 when I was 47, and my stepmother died in 1999 just after my 53rd birthday.

[hippiechick]

25. Lost my mom when I was 19; my dad when I was 28.

n/t

[Moosepoop]

26. Lost our Mom to pancreatic cancer in 1987.

She was 54, I was 25. My oldest sister passed away seven years ago from ovarian cancer, she was 43.

[CanuckAmok]

27. Dad died when I was 23, but I didn't find out till I was 28.

Needless to say, we weren't that close.

Mom's still kickin' (touch wood).

[yellowdogintexas]

29. I was 32 when my dad died, that was 2001 but my mom just

died this past October. He was 57, she was 79.

My mom lost her mother when she was about 19, to cancer.

My other grandmother lived to be 102.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

30. I was almost 38 when my father died

My mother is still going strong at 85.

[GreenPartyVoter]

31. 33, this past January. (Hence my advocacy for a grief group on DU)

[madison2000]

32. Its a huge event in anyones life

probably differs depending on age, but it takes a while to work through. My father died suddenly, and it took about 9 months before I lost that feeling I'd been slugged in the gut with a baseball bat.

[GreenPartyVoter]

33. I know that feeling well :^(

[madison2000]

34. Hang in there, you will get through it

:hug:

[GreenPartyVoter]

35. Maybe. Or maybe I will keep overeating until I explode. *blah*

[madison2000]

37. Lean into it. It sounds counter-intuitive, but grieving is

the only way back to feeling normal. I overeat when I'm slightly stressed, stop eating when I am extremely stressed.

I found that although you get a lot of support at first, you still need it a few months later and then its harder to find someone to talk to. I went to a therapist for about 6 months just to talk about my dad. Interestingly, she lost her mother during this time so she could really relate to me. I remember coming home from a days work (where my mind was focused on other things) and suddenly remembering that he was gone and bursting into tears. I had dreams where it all turned out to be a big mistake and he was still alive.

Finally, the loss becomes the new normal and you go on.

[GreenPartyVoter]

46. Yeah. I am waiting for the new normal. :^(

[fortyfeetunder]

50. Agreed; which reminds me of a book I once read...

I was coping over the loss of my mother when I was in my mid 30's, and there was this new book that came out on motherless daughters. So thinking, this would probably assuage my grief, I bought the book.

I had not gone as far as the introduction when the author said (in so many words) this book was specifically for women who lost a mother as a child; for adult women, death of a mother is to be expected...I turned around and took the book back to the store.

Death of a parent in any age is a significant event. Period.

[madison2000]

51. Its huge at any age

as is the loss of a sibling. Death of parents may be expected in the sense that we assume they will pass before we do, but there is nothing in that knowledge that really prepares you for the enormity of it.

[Ladyhawk]

36. Hmmm, I think it was before I turned thirty.

My father and I had a lousy relationship. I've never been back to his grave since the funeral and the cemetery is just a little way up the street. :shrug: We had nothing to say to one another in life. Even less now. I can't even remember the date and year of his death.

[Spirochete]

38. Mom and dad both went in 2000

I was 46 then

[THUNDER HANDS]

40. both my parents are still alive

but I'm 26 and I didn't think it was all that unusual until I started reading this thread and seeing that people lost their parents at a lot younger an age than I am now.

:(

[madison2000]

42. I grew up with someone whose parents both died while she was in

her twenties- she was the youngest and her parents had her in their forties. It seemed really young to me at the time but its not that uncommon. And it happens a lot in the thirties and forties. Appreciate them, they wont be around forever.

[HeeBGBz]

41. Both my parents died about 3 years ago

I was 47ish and suddenly felt like an orphan. No buffer zone between me and mortality now.

[easttexaslefty]

44. My dad died in 96

I was 40. He died from lung cancer due to agent orange exposure during vietnam. He was 66. I still miss him so much

[lumberingbear]

43. My Dad was 40 when he died, I was 20

My mother is 92 (with Alzheimer's) and I'm now 58.

[djeseru]

45. 21 when my dad died...

...single stab wound to the chest, died instantly. I found out on the local news before the medical examiner's office could locate me, his only child. It was a blast sticking it to the media when the dust cleared after the funeral.

[MrsMatt]

47. Age 28

I lost my mother to a sudden heart attack (she was only 58) on New Year's Day. She had cardiomyopathy, but the autopsy determined tthe cause to have been her inability to completely metabolize the prescription drugs she was taking for her bi-polar condition.

I'm now 42, and a day doesn't go by when I don't think of her and miss her.

[HamstersFromHell]

48. Mom when I was 39, dad when I was 45

n/t

[mordarlar]

49. My dad died at 32 in a car accident. I was 11. Mom a widow 28 with 4 kids

[madison2000]

52. wow that must have been tough for her

and all of you

[mordarlar]

57. Eh, we all made it. ; )

[Bullwinkle925]

53. Had to choose "other" - lost a dad when I was 9, another father

when I was 34, my mother when I was 37 and biological 'sperm-donor' when I was 46. Lost a sister when I was 52.

[Caria]

54. Our mother was a young widow too

Dad was in his early 40s, Mom was 38. I'm the oldest & was a sophomore in high school at the time.

[samplegirl]

55. Lost my father when i was 38

He was 77 and probably every girls idea of the perfect Dad.
I've hac my mother living with me since his death which is now
90. I was a change of life baby.

[shanti]

56. i'm 49

and both are still living. mom's 73 and dad's 76.

[borlis]

59. I was 33 when I lost my mom.

She was only 63 and suffered a massive heart attack. I am grateful that it was quick and she didn't suffer. I miss her so much. She is missing her 6 grandchildren growing up, the eldest will be getting married this summer. My dad is still alive at 76. He had a heart attack a few years ago and open heart surgery afterward and is doing ok. I do feel totally ripped off that I lost my mom at such a young age. :cry:

[enigmatic]

60. 17 and 22

It's been awhile, but I still think about it every day..

[njdemocrat106]

61. I lost my dad last year

He was 53, I was 23. He had lung cancer that spread to the brain. Awful, awful way to go. :(

[ffm172]

62. was 26 when my dad died way too young at the age of 55

[Skittles]

63. my dad shot himself 3 days before my 27th birthday

lived for six days

[ffm172]

64. ouch

that must have been a tough time for your family. Sorry to hear. It is hard enough if a parent dies of natural causes but to do a suicide .... how did you get through this? .hug:

[Skittles]

66. lots of suicides in my family

got the news from my roommate: your dad shot himself in the head; he's not dead but he won't live another day. First thing I said was, "I always knew he would do this." I always think about it around my birthday and now, alas, I'll think about my brother's death at Thanksgiving - he drank himself to death last year. I remember him telling me that soon he would be dad's age when he died. Dad was 50, Glenn was 48. :(

[ffm172]

67. I am so sorry

my uncle died at the age of 56 due to his alcoholism. Same year as my dad died. So sorry that both died around a supposingly happy day for you.

[Skittles]

68. alcholism really sucks

a terrible disease

[Historic NY]

65. Lost both my parents before I was 13yrs old....

Mother at 4 1/2 on my father birthday I remember it because we had a blizzard with 4-5ft of snow. My father died a few days after Christmas in that terrible year of 1968, I was almost 13. Both my brother and I then left (ran-a-way) home (stepmother)and never went back. My uncle who passed recently and his wife took us in. Some days I feel cheated but still have fond memories. Both my brother & myself were there in both instances as it happened at home.

[Bombtrack]

Nobody I ever loved has died yet

wierd, I'm like the only person I know (my age) who can say that that I know of. Unless you count dogs and cats. But no people. Lost all my grandparents before I was old enough to remember them.

And before you say I'm lucky I have a feeling that when I do it'll just hit me harder because I haven't had the coping skills. Cause I find myself more petrified of losing loved ones than most people I know.

[Bombtrack]

69. Nobody I ever loved has died yet

wierd, I'm like the only person I know (my age) who can say that that I know of. Unless you count dogs and cats. But no people. Lost all my grandparents before I was old enough to remember them.

And before you say I'm lucky I have a feeling that when I do it'll just hit me harder because I haven't had the coping skills. Cause I find myself more petrified of losing loved ones than most people I know.

[Binka]

70. Mom Died In 1995 I Was 36 She Was 65

My dad is still alive and still an asshole. He will be 75 in May. Bah.

[lavenderdiva]

72. I was 37 when I lost my parents...

my dad died in December of a sudden heartattack, and 4 months later, my mom died, also of a sudden heartattack. Those were some of the roughest years that I didn't think I would make it through. I wouldn't wish that experience on anyone. Ten years later, it still makes me cry. I miss them so much, and they were relatively young: 63 and 61.

[TOhioLiberal]

73. Both within the same time period...

My dad died when I was 31.
My mom died this past Oct., when I was 42.

[bikebloke]

74. Estranged from "mother" since 15

In twenty-some years, she never once tried contacting me. Of course there wasn't any money in it for her. And considering her behavior, I certainly didn't want anything to do with that person ever again. So I refused to have anything to do with her made-for-tv deathbed scene. Yet instead of turning misogynist, I'm pro-feminist with great disdain for gold digging women.

After fifty-some years of smoking, my father joined the ancestors about six years ago.

[Lindsey]

75. My dad died in a car wreck when I was 12...

n/t