The Rainbow Bridge (warning: contents highly flameable)

[Modem Butterfly]

Everyone who's had a pet, or been on the Internet, is familiar with The Rainbow Bridge. It's a touching piece about animals who had died waiting in some kind of limbo for their owners. Let me say at the outset that the damn thing makes me tear up everytime I read it because I've lost some animals I was pretty close to. In fact, I'm tearing up right now. Really. So please don't tell me I'm a cold woman with a stone where my heart should be, because I'm not.

The Rainbow Bridge is the worst piece of glurge ever written. It goes straight for the gut, pure emotional firepower burning nothing but syrupy sweet platitudes about your soft-eyed friends waiting to lick your face again. I don't believe in the afterlife, so I don't believe I'm going to see my beloved puppychildren again, and of course, that's a depressing thought. But I find even more depressing the idea that animals are just hanging out, waiting for us and only us on the other side. What if your animal, like mine, was a rescue who had more than one owner? Is he waiting for you, or has he already hooked up with the kindly old lady who died and whose kids turned him into the animal shelter? If my partner dies before me, will my departed animals already have moved on and not be there to greet me, or will he be waiting, tapping his ethereal foot wondering what took me so long? Or worse, will our animals "dis" him in the next life, preferring to wait for the human who was such a soft touch with the treats? And exactly how many animals will be waiting for me, anyway? Will Ikie and Patty, the dogs I knew growing up, be waiting? And will they still be trying to eat Brindle, my childhood cat? What about all those guppies I fed to my axoltls in college? Or the stray cats I fed? And what about all those animals that didn't have humans?

I have a friend who does dog rescue, and she sends me all sorts of Rainbow Bridge stuff. Turns out, there's a Rainbow Bridge to Hell for pets who have been abused. I really DON'T like going to sleep knowing that my departed animals are waiting by the Rainbow Bridge to bite the shit out of some dude that mistreated them. Or do I? Now that I think about it, I could have been quicker with dinner most nights, and more free-handed with the treats. Great, more guilt on top of how bad I already feel that they're gone. My friend also sent me a Rainbow Bridge story about 9/11, in which the angels called on animals without humans to meet the newly dead, and "on every tail was an American flag," What about those people who weren't American? How about the ones who were allergic to animals, or didn't like animals or were afraid of them? My friend Lou died at the WTC and he hated dogs and wasn't too fond of cats, but he liked snakes. Was there a boa with his name on it?

Come to think of it, maybe it's better that I don't believe in an afterlife.

I had two wonderful dogs who died too soon. I cremated them, and when I go, I intend to be cremated and have their ashes and mine scattered off Cape Arago in Oregon. Til then, I have warm, wistful memories of them, but they live now only in my heart. I have two living puppy children whom I adore. I hope when they go, it's a long time from now, and peacefully. I hope the same for Will and I.

[Liberal Veteran]

1. The Goddess will punish you for your blasphemy!

:P

[Modem Butterfly]

2. Of that I have no doubt

It's easy to see why I'm an atheist, isn't it? Would YOU want me in your Sunday school class?

[TXlib]

7. Actually, yes, if your Sunday School is UU!

[Az]

22. I used to teach sunday school

In a UU Church of course.

[Pithlet]

3. Yeah.

Stuff that's general and meant to comfort people in their grief is almost always glurge. I don't think it's meant to be analyzed. But, I don't think you're a cold, heartless woman. I completely agree with you. I have been known to whip that out, however, to comfort someone when I know it's the kind of thing they'll appreciate. And, it makes me tear up, too :cry: Why can't our pets live longer?

[Modem Butterfly]

5. Fuck. I don't know. But it's their only flaw, really.

[demnan]

4. Yeah, I'm a big pet lover

but the Rainbow Bridge is crap. But I don't believe in life after death. Some people need to, so it extends to their pets.

[TXlib]

6. I love your little "Hello Cthulhu" sig image!

And I feel the same way about the Rainbow Bridge.

It makes me tear up, but it's a saccharine piece of literary crap.

[ghostsofgiants]

8. I've ahda pet and spend most of my day on the internet

And I've never heard of The Rainbow Bridge.

[nickinSTL]

10. Same here

The Rainbow Bridge, to me, is Bifrost, the bridge connecting Midgard (Earth) to Asgard (home of the Asa-gods)

Sorry, I'm a heathen :P

[Modem Butterfly]

13. Here 'tis

http://rainbowsbridge.com/Poem.htm

[Catchawave]

9. Grab your hanky.....

I find this piece to be more comforting:

http://www.eoneill.com/texts/blemie/contents.htm

[Modem Butterfly]

12. Goddamnit.

All I had to do was read the first couple of lines and I was sobbing like a damn baby.

[Patiod]

14. Re; O'Neill piece -- my cat would demand suttee/sati

The O'Neill piece was lovely, but all I could think of while I was reading about his noble dog was that my cat would demand that SO and I throw ourselves on her funeral pyre.

No Cat anymore? Then what need is there for her servants? Off they go, so they can't serve some other, less deserving cat.

[Pithlet]

15. Now I'm wailing over here.

:cry: :cry: :cry:

I'm going to bookmark this for future use. I'd never seen it before.

[Skittles]

11. lots of people believe in fairy tales for humans

it's easy to see how they extend it to their pets. Leave them be though - they simply have to believe this in order to live it seems.

[Modem Butterfly]

16. Yeah, I know

And I would never dream of telling them otherwise. Still, I wish I could find a way to ask my friend not to send me anymore damn Rainbow Bridge e-mails.

[Skittles]

17. see, they mean well and we understand that

but it gets old when it is constantly pushed in our faces.

[CO Liberal]

18. For People Who Believe In An Afterlife....

...the Rainbow Bridge site can be a great comfort. I know it was a great comfort to my wife and me when we lost our cat Sweetpea and our dog Cooter.

[Modem Butterfly]

19. Here's some of the variations I wrote about: (3 hankies and 4 barf bags)

http://www.newrainbowbridge.com/NRB/rbpoem.htm

Rhyming Rainbow Bridge

http://home.flash.net/~skyangel/rainbowbridge_911/rainbowbridge_911.html

Rainbow Bridge 9/11

http://www.animalliberationfront.com/Saints/Authors/Stories/Rainbow%20Bridge%20for%20RESCUERS.html

Animal Rescue Rainbow Bridge

[Book Lover]

20. You are very correct

I came into contact with it while working rabbit rescue. It is a great comfort; perhaps a real poet will someday do it justice.

[Modem Butterfly]

21. Maybe it's the PMS

But as much as I dislike the damn thing, and its variants, I turn into a puddle of soggy mush whenever I read it. Even the cheesy 9/11 one. When I got to the line about the unwanted Dalmatians asking to meet the dea firemen, I just started crying, thinking the whole time, "That is so asinine. What the hell is wrong with me?"

I guess that's why they call it glurge. It's so bad, yet it's so good at the same time.

[Book Lover]

24. Never read any of the variants

As a native NY'er, I find my hackles raise anytime I see something glurgy about 9/11. But I digress...

[Worst Username Ever]

23. Same thing goes for people.

If I am married and in love, and then I die, and my wife re-marries years later, and then they die, who does she spend time with in the afterlife? Me or the the new guy?

[Pithlet]

26. Maybe

heaven is just one big swinging, happening place :)

Okay, that was my blasphemy for the evening.

[shesemsmom]

25. I like part of the rainbow bridge concept

just knowing my pets are happy playing and waiting for me gives me some comfort that I may see them again some day. And that they are not suffering anymore

[flvegan]

27. As for animals that didn't have humans

There is a variant of the original poem, which I'll post, as a rescuer, called "Rainbow Bridge For Rescuers" which is also a comfort, that may help some with the conflict/sadness some might feel as it relates to the homeless and unwanted animals.

I often question the need of folks, both here and elsewhere, to shit on another person's beliefs based on what the original person believes. That's the same ego-based BS that drives everything G.W. Asshat does.

Anyway, here it is...
Rainbow Bridge for Rescuers

Unlike most days at Rainbow Bridge, this day dawned cold and gray, damp as a swamp and as dismal as could be imagined. All of the recent arrivals had no idea what to think, as they had never experienced a day like this before. But the animals who had been waiting for their beloved people knew exactly what was going on and started to gather at the pathway leading to The Bridge to watch.

It wasn't long before an elderly animal came into view, head hung low and tail dragging. The other animals, the ones who had been there for a while, knew what his story was right away, for they had seen this happen far too often.

He approached slowly, obviously in great emotional pain, but with no sign of injury or illness. Unlike all of the other animals waiting at The Bridge, this animal had not been restored to youth and made healthy and vigorous again. As he walked toward The Bridge, he watched all of the other animals watching him. He knew he was out of place here and the sooner he could cross over, the happier he would be.

But, alas, as he approached The Bridge, his way was barred by the appearance of an Angel who apologized, but told him that he would not be able to pass. Only those animals who were with their people could pass over Rainbow Bridge. With no place else to turn to, the elderly animal turned towards the fields before The Bridge and saw a group of other animals like himself, also elderly and infirm.

They weren't playing, but rather simply lying on the green grass, forlornly staring out at the pathway leading to The Bridge. And so, he took his place among them, watching the pathway and waiting.

One of the newest arrivals at The Bridge didn't understand what he had just witnessed and asked one of the animals that had been there for a while to explain it to him.

"You see, that poor animal was a rescue. He was turned in to rescue just as you see him now, an older animal with his fur graying and his eyes clouding. He never made it out of rescue and passed on with only the love of his rescuer to comfort him as he left his earthly existence. Because he had no family to give his love to, he has no one to escort him across The Bridge."

The first animal thought about this for a minute and then asked, "So what will happen now?" As he was about to receive his answer, the clouds suddenly parted and the gloom lifted. Approaching The Bridge could be seen a single person and among the older animals, a whole group was suddenly bathed in a golden light and they were all young and healthy again, just as they were in the prime of life.

"Watch, and see.", said the second animal. A second group of animals from those waiting came to the pathway and bowed low as the person neared. At each bowed head, the person offered a pat on the head or a scratch behind the ears. The newly restored animals fell into line and followed him towards The Bridge. They all crossed The Bridge together.

"What happened?"

"That was a rescuer. The animals you saw bowing in respect were those who found new homes because of his work. They will cross when their new families arrive. Those you saw restored were those who never found homes. When a rescuer arrives, they are allowed to perform one, final act of rescue. They are allowed to escort those poor animals that they couldn't place on earth across The Rainbow Bridge."

And so it goes...

[DS1]

28. I've been on every internet, and have never seen this Rainbow Bridge

thing :shrug: