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It's a long time from today. Tell me how you die.

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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:03 PM
Original message
It's a long time from today. Tell me how you die.
Here's how I die:

I'm up to my neck in work, and I get really frustrated and decide to just go home at 7 PM. I'm on my way to my car, cursing my lousy, low-paying over-working job, when I'm mowed down by a streetsweeper. I die wishing I'd spent more time at work.
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:08 PM
Response to Original message
1. Kicking my own post
:kick:
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politicaholic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:12 PM
Response to Original message
2. Complications from Cancer...
45 years from now I'll be in a home struggling with cancer, get a surgery and die from infection.
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ohiosmith Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:13 PM
Response to Original message
3. Massive coronary at 119 when I am served with a paternity suit from the
Swedish Bikini Team
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Worst Username Ever Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:13 PM
Response to Original message
4. From explosive diarreah
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:27 PM
Response to Reply #4
12. Good one!
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eyesroll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:14 PM
Response to Original message
5. Cancer.
On my mom's side:
My grandmother died of breast cancer that metastasized.
My uncle was successfully treated for breast cancer. (Yes, you read that correctly.)

On my dad's side:
My grandmother was successfully treated for breast cancer.
My grandfather was successfully treated for thyroid cancer.
My aunt died of metastasized breast cancer.
My uncle is currently being treated for a chronic form of leukemia that doctors say will likely kill him, but it could take decades.
My aunt was successfully treated for skin cancer.

My mom, dad, sister and I have thus far been lucky. But it's all over my family otherwise.
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Arkana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:15 PM
Response to Original message
6. Trampled by rampaging emus
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sniffa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:16 PM
Response to Original message
7. i faLL asLeep at the wheeL whiLe driving on the highway
or much sooner, i'm shot and martyred for my poLiticaL beLiefs. :P
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txaslftist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:18 PM
Response to Original message
8. In a neocon camp, like the rest of you...
and its not so long from today.
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:27 PM
Response to Reply #8
11. Ooohhhh
A bit too close to home for me...
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txaslftist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 03:10 PM
Response to Reply #11
18. Okay, that was, perhaps, a little bleak...LOL
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democracyindanger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:19 PM
Response to Original message
9. While pissing on Chimpy's grave
Decades from now, I will be urinating on Chimpy's headstone, and a security guard will tazer me, short-circuiting my pacemaker.
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Mr. McD Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:21 PM
Response to Original message
10. Shot by a jealous husband at 99.
Edited on Thu Feb-10-05 02:22 PM by Mr. McD
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jswordy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:28 PM
Response to Original message
13. Massive heart attack.
It's in the cards.
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ProfessorGAC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:35 PM
Response to Original message
14. Like Jack Lemmon In Bagger Vance
Heart just stops while i'm playing golf. Perfect!

The alternative would be to have my dog spill beer on my feet while i'm playing electric guitar and end up like the guy in Stone the Crows!
The Professor
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:36 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. Now that has style!
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:38 PM
Response to Original message
16. I'm 120 and the hottub party at the Playboy mansion gets a little out of
hand. Sure had fun, though.
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fortyfeetunder Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 02:41 PM
Response to Original message
17. Probably kidney failure
It doesn't look good. My mom and her siblings were all diabetics and three of them had kidney failure. One is still left and on kidney dialysis.

I have to tell my MD's whatever meds they give me, must be gentle on the kidneys, I can at least fight off getting diabetes through diet and exercise, but I don't want to damage my kidneys...

However, fear I will succumb to the genetic curse...
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StopTheMorans Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 03:13 PM
Response to Original message
19. i post one too many copycat threads, someone doesn't realize
my thread is a copycat, posts a serious reply to it, which i then reply to with a copycat of their serious reply. they track me down, and i die via brunt force trauma administered by beating by cat.
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. ROFLMAO!
MEOW! SMACK! MEOW! SMACK!
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dean_dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 04:00 PM
Response to Original message
21. Trying to drop a bomb on the Russkies....
Unfortunately, the release is busted so I jump on it. It finally releases, and I ride it like a horse all the way to the ground yelling "Yaaa-hooooo!!!!!"

Oh wait, that's not me....
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loudestchick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 04:03 PM
Response to Original message
22. Planning to be raptured. Have a blessed day!
:puke: :puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke:
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Modem Butterfly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 07:04 PM
Response to Reply #22
23. It's the chorus line of puking smilies that make your post complete!
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yvr girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-10-05 07:27 PM
Response to Original message
24. Hail of gun fire
just like in Bonnie and Clyde.
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