"Why the Republicans Won"

[Glenda]

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When another person jumped in and explained that the sun rises in the east (and has for some time), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff."

And then she voted.


I used to work in technical support for a 24 / 7 call center. One day I got a call from an InDUHvidual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Pacific.."

And then he voted.


So my colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving."

And then she voted.


I was in a high school advanced physics class and the teacher was talking about a new military weapon that uses sonic waves on the battlefield to burst enemy soldier's chests. One InDUHvidual in the class spoke up and said, "Well that's stupid! Why don't they just wear headphones?"

And a few years later, he voted.


My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car. It's designed to cut through a seatbelt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

And then she voted.


My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought two cases. The cashier multiplied two times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

And then they all voted.


I was hanging out with a real liberal friend of mine when we saw a woman walk by us with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I had to explain to her that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned.

And then she voted.


I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because they were trained professionals and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"

And then she voted

[underpants]

1. Sunday:My stepfather complained that their house went up $38K in value

and that he was going to have to pay X amount in real estate tax now.

He had already voted.

[eataTREE]

3. Gosh, it sure sucks when your investments appreciate in value!

Maybe the housing market will crash and he can lose all his equity. Then I'm sure he'll be much happier.

This makes about as much sense as the "lucky duckies" WSJ editorial: Oh those lucky, lucky people who don't owe any income tax because they're FLAT BROKE.

[underpants]

5. No he didn't understand WHY the assessed value went up so much

and he is nowhere near a dummy (great guy really) he just didn't understand that the localities around here had to boost assessed value because of all the revenue they lost when former (thank God) Gov. Gilmore's "No car tax" went into effect, the localities still haven't recovered....but hey NO CAR TAX!!

[LDS Jock]

2. my favorite one is the chain from the nose to ear

I can so hear someone saying that.

[liberal N proud]

4. Yes people realy are that stupid

Then they went to church and listened to the preacher tell how great the shimp in the white house was
And then they voted.

[baldguy]

6. Buys a Hummer that get 5 MPG,

and complains every time they pay $80 to fill the tank.

And the they voted.

[gpandas]

7. when i worked on an auto

assembly line in lordstown, ohio, a co-worker asked me where i was going on vacation. i responded, "the beach at north carolina", and he said, "you should stop in at the new oklahoma plant on your way." at a complete loss for words, i lied, " i'm flying, man." He then asked,"wonder if you can see the plant from the airplane?" i don't think he voted.

[LamedVov]

8. This time but not next time

I agree that they may have done a better job of bringing out their voters than 4 years ago. I think they were helped by a perception, no matter how wrongly held, that Bush was tougher on terrorism and defense than Kerry. Next time we need to beat them at their own game by supporting a candidate who is perceived as hard as nails on defense but smarter at wielding the sword. Let me suggest a couple of possible candidates who I think fit the bill (although I will be the first to admit that this list is far from comprehensive):

Hillary Clinton
Harold Ford, Jr.
Bill Richardson
Evan Bayh
Jennifer Granholm

These are all tough practical politicians with national reputations who are viewed as moderately liberal and not weak on defense issues.