Do you need a date?

[short bus president]

Uh...





Uh...





Didn't need no welfare state?






Everybody pulled his weight?










Gee our old LaSalle ran great?





:shrug:

[SOteric]

1. I thought I'd try dried apricot

for my evening with the grovelbot.

[short bus president]

2. Ho hum.

Have a plum. Drink some rum. Put yer thumb in yer bum until it goes numb.

Damn, these rhyming threads are dumb.

[SOteric]

3. Indeed they are, no prevarication,

they're about as dumb as word inflation.

:7 :hi:

[short bus president]

7. Um...

We're just here to do the Superbowl Shuffle?

;-)

[HEyHEY]

4. I need more than that

[short bus president]

5. OK, then:

Boy, the way Glen Miller played.
Songs that made the Hit Parade.
Guys like us, we had it made.

Those were the days!

Didn't need no welfare state.
Everybody pulled his weight.
Gee, our old LaSalle ran great.

Those were the days!

And you knew where you were then!
Girls were girls and men were men.
Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.

People seemed to be content.
Fifty dollars paid the rent.
Freaks were in a circus tent.

Those were the days!

Take a little Sunday spin,
go to watch the Dodgers win.
Have yourself a dandy day that cost you under a fin.

Hair was short and skirts were long.
Kate Smith really sold a song.
I don't know just what went wrong!

Those Were the Days!

[DS1]

6. You buying?

Sure!

[DS1]

8. in fact, fuck it, I'll buy

:bounce:

Let's go pound some beers

[short bus president]

10. pound beer good

me likey baby stewey

love you long time.

[DS1]

15. I say, do you know what you can do with a pacifier?

;-)

/Stewie

[SOteric]

12. Tart.

[DS1]

14. Hey, I'm getting some swoontang over here, back off you!

A guy's gotta get some love

[short bus president]

16. Shhhh! You can't talk to a MOD like that!

Perhaps Esso will need to punish us both for this unsettling display of brazen manhussyism?

[DS1]

17. Why, do they have SCMODS?

Sarcophagus Cutting Mission Oriented Digging System? aka the 'deadly tombstone' ?

Fuck that, fuck them, fuck esso, let's drink, wuss

[short bus president]

18. Don't rush me!

My sensibilities are delicate!

And the Yuengling's not cold yet.

Warm lager is for scavery british wankers!

[DS1]

19. That's Limey Assholes, but we'll work on how you address me later

Now change my diaper! :grr:

[short bus president]

22. And then the sexy parties?

You promise?

[DS1]

24. Yes, the sexy parties, and later, the oral sex

and spanking!

[short bus president]

27. but the parties are definitely first, right?

I like to examine a deal every which way before I commit. Can I get this in writing? You got a pen and a gun?

And how can I be sure you're REALLY a notary?

[DS1]

29. The parties are first, the rest can come later, unless you get cold feet

because nobody likes dealing with cold feet :P

And I'm not a Notary, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express :think:

[short bus president]

32. A Holiday Inn Express?

What kind of cheap tramp do you think I am?

[DS1]

33. They have lots of parking, and stair rails all around, with ramps

and automatic doors, you can't go wrong Mr. Short Bus (if you're still calling yourself that, that is)

[short bus president]

36. Do they have

the little shaving mirror in the bathroom? It helps me tweeze my nose hairs.

[DS1]

37. *sigh* Yes, you can tweeze your nose hairs, but MORE IMPORTANTLY...

They have a lovely velour covered baby changing station on every floor, doesn't ~that~ sound appetizing?

[SOteric]

34. Oo! Oo! Me!

May I answer that?!!

:hi:

[DS1]

35. Nort.

!!!!

[Misunderestimator]

9. Thank you! All these years, and I never knew it was ...

"our old LaSalle"

[short bus president]

11. yer sure welcome.

And since you brought up the topic of mystery lyrics, maybe you can tell me what "wrapped up like a douche something-something in the night" is all about? That one's just never made sense.

[Wat_Tyler]

13. Isn't it 'revved-up like a deuce, another runner in the night'?

[Misunderestimator]

25. It's deuce all right, but I too thought it was douche for the longest

time...

[short bus president]

28. I couldn't say. It's one of those enduring mysteries.

Like the existence of woodchucks.

[ScreamingMeemie]

20. Yes. I would like February 21st please. I have always been partial to

it. :hi:

[short bus president]

21. Well, dear,

surely you know the difference between needing something and being partial to it?

Besides, you forgot to specify the year, anyway. Don't think for a minute you can snooker me into selling you a Sun's life worth of February 21s for the cost of a single date...

;-)

[ScreamingMeemie]

23. Dammit. Well, how 'bout buy one, get one...

say, 2009 and 1958. :shrug: Hey, gotta get something for nothing.

[short bus president]

26. alas, there's no such thing as something for nothing

but since I like you, I think we can work something out. How's this:

You buy the February 21 of your choice, and I'll throw in the one that WOULD'VE happened the year after the world/solar system/universe ends. This actually has huge payoff potential if you can ever figure the alternate realities thing out. Know what I'm sayin'?

;-)

[ScreamingMeemie]

30. Do I still get the date, the second one that is, if the planets realign

and life as we know it continues...Do I get my money back if, for some reason, Jesus decides not to show on Judgment Day??

[short bus president]

31. First question, yes

so long as life as we know it continues, you'll own the February 21 for the year after it stops.

Second question, yer gonna have to take that up with Pat Robertson. He manages Jesus' money, you know? And I hear he's not even Jewish!