Almost the complete Letterman Kerry vs bu*sh comparison bit.

[moof]

Transcription not exact but very close.

Since champaign for president is just around the corner, so tonight we thought it would be a good opportunity for us to show you a little comparison between John Kerry and george bush.

Here's how this goes,

John Kerry critized for throwing away his military service medals,
bush, ... no medals to throw.

Kerry remembered by Yale classmates as an ambitious,
intelligent young man who was going places.

bush, remembered by Yale classmates as a cheerleader

he was a cheerleader, I think that's the thing to keep in mind
There he is right there


In times of trouble who do you want leading this country well by gosh I want a cheerleader leading this country.

bush, strongly opposes the legalization of gay marriage,

kerry, noncommittal on the issue of gay marriage but would marry a dude if it would help get him elected.

bush, Mary Kay

Kerry, Ashley

John Kerry now, his wife describes herself as sexy.

bush, his mother describes herself as a "dime-piece shorty with a bangin' booty,yo.

Kerry, constantly getting ketchup in his bank account

bush, constantly getting ketchup on his nice " presidentin'" pants.

Kerry, believes the solution to a peaceful Iraq is complicated.

bush, believes the plot to a "Soulplane was complicated.

John Kerry calls saddam hussein a red herring in the war on terror.

bush calls saddam hussein late at night and makes electric chair noises.

bush describes kerry as a flip flopper

kerry thinks of himself as more of a waffler.

Kerry thinks hamid karzai should guard against a taliban resurgence.

bush, " huh? "

and finally, and this is not fair this last one but we'll do it anyway.

finally,

kerry, horseface

bush, jackass

[Langis]

1. Thank you!

[moof]

2. bump for the day side

[ACK]

3. The night before he made fun of Bush and said,

"Gosh I am going to miss that man."

You heard Letterman called the election.

Ha!

[moof]

4. work work work transcribiing this and this is all the Thanks Dave gets

n/t