Shit I learned at the corporate All-Hands meeting

[ACK]

Advanced video
urgency, quality
done now teamwork
cheer, cheer
blah, blah....

Business complicated
Responsibility = blamestorming
new perspective, re-hire
clear house, fuck you
sell customers
sell to customer
blah, blah....

New eyes, stab out old
with cheap silverware
dinner forks in a hotel,
in a meeting
blah, blah, blah...

Creative, intellectual
live in a cube
Think out of the box
blah...
fucking
blah....

[Ellen Forradalom]

1. HAHAHAHA

Poetry in the age of Dilbert.
That was LOL funny.

[GOPisEvil]

2. Sounds familiar!

I bet our bosses all read the same "management techniques" book, or attended the same seminar.

[ACK]

4. The kicker was

They announced they had spent 7 million dollars to come up with a mission statement and to figure out they should be customer focused.

I expected Dilbert to fall out of the sky any minute.

_

[GOPisEvil]

5. Sounds like Tom Ridge spending a gazillion bucks and a year

to come up with the color-code alert system.

[NoPasaran]

7. I'll take "Synergistic Paradigms" for 200, Alex

They could have saved about seven million bucks and just used this
http://umweb2.unitedmedia.com/comics/dilbert/games/career/bin/ms.cgi

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

3. You should post the doodles you drew in your notes. n/t

[ACK]

9. Nothing special but I found a another quasi-poem

I want to deconstruct
the paradigm of
the consumer value
of my business school
babble with added value
of the mission statement
created by consultants
who if they can't solve
the problem then at
least they can make
several million dollars
prolonging the issue.

[htuttle]

6. Just be happy they didn't hand out copies of "Who Moved My Cheese?"

!

[daveskilt]

8. the first time I saw Office Space I cried

it was funny but then not funny when I realized it was about my life...trading the cube in now - got the MBA and learned to speak like the paradigm merchants.

The plan is to infiltrate and subvert from the inside...work on making employees happier (like giving respect, money and meaningful work instead of BS and crappy $5 gift certificates when they save the company $1million)

of course I could be assimilated and turn into one of the dilbert bosses...I'm relying on you guys to watch for the warning signs.

[lpbk2713]

10. Damn I'm glad I retired early while I still have a little sanity.

They did their best to take it all. The worst thing they did was to create a dog-eat-dog environment that turned employess against each other. A lot of people fell for it and didn't see it as a union busting move.