What fresh hell is this?

[SweetZombieJesus]

I'm really at a loss on this one, I can barely contain my exasperation.

About two minutes ago, I got a phone call, not from a telemarketer, but a RECORDED ANNOUNCEMENT telling me that "From Justin To Kelly" will be on Charter PPV next week.

Go back and read that paragraph again. I GOT A COMMERCIAL ON MY FUCKING PHONE. A week ago, someone knocked on my door. Was it Mormons? Jehovahs? NO! It was someone there to tell me about the great deals at Papa John's! A FUCKING COMMERCIAL KNOCKED ON MY DOOR!

So it's official: We now live in the United States Of Advertising. There is no escape from marketers. In death, they'll plaster corporate logos all over my coffin.

[Zomby Woof]

1. get on that National Registry

Do it now.

[SweetZombieJesus]

4. I'm already on it

And really, telemarketers aren't my biggest phone peeve: I CONSTANLTY get wrong number calls, somewhere in the vicinity of nine to 10 a day, and none of them are EVER for the same person.

[Zomby Woof]

5. wait until October 1

Since you registered before August 31, you have to wait until Oct 1 for it to take effect, and file complaints.

[Elidor]

8. Zombie! You're back!

I didn't vote in your poll, but I was always partial to the old Woof. :hi:

[Zomby Woof]

17. thanks!

I am being difficult and posting under both names. :-)

[madfloridian]

19. Don't you get confused?

:evilgrin:

[Zomby Woof]

20. Of course I do!

Which adds to the general mayhem and mischief! :D

[Cha]

12. I can't wait ...thanks for the info! Oct. 1st, eh?

:-)

[Zomby Woof]

15. yes, and...

If you register after August 31, you have to wait until November...

[jumptheshadow]

7. You think that's bad?

We've got the same number, but different local area code, for one of the desks at the Dominican Consulate. We spend a fair amount of our free time trying to explain, in broken Spanish, that we can't help with visas.

[catzies]

2. Is Charter your cable company?

Not that it's right, but that may be why.

[SweetZombieJesus]

3. Yes they are, but still

I've NEVER used their PPV service except for a few skin flicks when I was drunk, and some wrestling PPVs. Based solely on my past purchases, where the fuck did they get the idea that they should give me a heads up on a movie starring those two spawn of Satan? Why would purchasing pornos make anyone think "Gee, maybe he'll like this sub-human pile of cinematic feces!"

I guarantee you every one of the pornos I ordered had a better plot than From Justin To Kelly. Better acting too.

[blondeatlast]

6. I got the Papa John's commercial at my doorstep too.

LIVID! (after overcoming my initial shock.)

The kid was nearby so my manner and language were restrained (emphais on STRAINED) but I e-mailed the HQ right away.

Our homes are no longer ours, Americans. May God have mercy on our souls.

ZW/SZJ--please "zombie-ize" these scum-sucking, lowlife bastards instead of resting in your coffin! :evilgrin:

[SweetZombieJesus]

13. I was too shocked to go off on the poor guy

I would have LOVED for it to be a Mormon or something. I had some show up at my door when I was trying to watch the Stones concert, so I asked them if they wanted to come in and shoot up or some other such nonsense, and they looked at each other, and then walked away.

But this was just too much. I'll deal with the religious types humorously, but god dammit, don't bring a commercial to my door! Isn't it bad enough I have to see idiot teenagers running around in Abercrombie & Fitch and GAP clothes? Don't these morons realize they're walking billboards?

[molly]

9. Been getting them a lot lately - even marketing calls are

recorded and if you don't listen to the entire message, you miss the part about pushing "1" to take yourself off the list.

[blondeatlast]

14. I haven't been listening through--does the pressing one thing

really work? It sounds like the "unsubscribe" scam to me?

[Cha]

10. They're always thinking of new and exciting "Fresh Hells" for us!

I would be pissed, too, if that happened to me! :grr:

[blondeatlast]

11. BTW--I don't see "From Justin To Kelly" as being quite

your cup of, well, whatever.

If it's any consolation (it isn't, I know), they obviously need help in targeting their audience.

Or do they???

[SweetZombieJesus]

18. The only way I'd rent it is if they allowed me to have the original film

cans. I'd then proceed to take a dump in the cans, and send them directly to the stars so they can more accurately gauge my customer satisfaction.

I'm a focus group's worst nightmare. Sometimes I daydream about being in one and rallying the people to start a riot at whatever multiplex its being held at.

[WhoCountsTheVotes]

16. Charge them for your time and your phone!

This is repulsive beyond belief. Everyone should immediately send these companies a bill for your services of acting as a test market for them. Charge as much as you can get away with. Sue them as much as you can until they pay the bill.

Imagine what they'll try next?

[FreeperSlayer]

21. qtf

eom