Football Kills (Is this a joke?)

[Champ]

Citzens United Against Football

"People don't kill people : footballs kill people."

The ten main strikes against football
1.Footballs used to be made out of real pigskin. PETA and other animal anti-cruelty groups should oppose these most despicable objects. They represent death in more ways than one.
2.People watching football eat unhealthy foods, especially teenagers.
3.Football artificial turf is not environmentally green. It merely gives the illusion of being a natural sport. Football is in reality most unnatural, and deadly.
4.Football scoreboards cause eyestrain, therefore further making 5.football an unhealthy and unnatural sport.
6.Football fields are not metric. Another instance of American foulness and ignorance.
7.Most football insignia and mascots are politically incorrect and designed to promote hatred of other races or animals. There we find that the Deadly Sport really thrives on hatred.
8.Boys playing football are encouraged to slap each other on the butt. Here's an article about a town that requires a license to dance, because "Dancing is one of those things that entices. It imitates sexual contact."
9.The football industry lures even the smallest children into violence, by selling nerf footballs.
10.The football leagues have resisted every common sense effort to design a safer football. They persist in using bi-pointed forms, which not only can make someone blind, but has obvious phallic symbolism.
In fact, it's the evil football lobby that has blocked every effort at common sense reform.

http://www.footballkills.org/
http://www.footballkills.org/tenstrikes.html

[lolly]

1. If you have to ask . . .

C'mon.

[Champ]

3. I don't know

I really can't tell. The stuff makes me crack up but at the same time it looks like they are being serious.

[Terran]

9. There are people

some of whom are probably hre at DU, who would make these proposals seriously. So that does sorta make it hard to tell if it's serious or not. I hope not.

[Champ]

2. lol

1. the registration of all footballs, especially those in the hands of our children.
2. the creation of a football license, distributed based on attendance to football awareness classes.
3. no selling of footballs to underage kids.

more
http://www.footballkills.org/intro.html

[rogerashton]

4. But --

2.People watching football eat unhealthy foods, especially teenagers.

But those teenagers taste so good ....

[Champ]

5. rotflmao

Thanks for the laugh. :D

[Wickerman]

6. An attempt at humor

to support the 2nd ammendment from the libitarian perspective.

"Of course, Libertarians wouldn't support a ban on football any more than they support a ban on guns, said Dasbach.

"Protecting the lives of young people who play high school football is the job of parents, school officials, and coaches, not politicians," he said. "And protecting the Second Amendment is the job of every American, since so many politicians have fumbled their duty to defend the fundamental human rights -- including the right to keep and bear arms -- guaranteed in the Constitution."

http://www.lp.org/press/archive.php?function=view&record=162

[rocktivity]

7. I've wanted to start www.stopchampagneabuse.org

ever since I saw a champagne bottle get stepped on at a Jewish wedding. Champagne bottles are being shaken up and popped open, smashed against ships, poured over the heads of victors, dissolved in orange juice to make mimosas. Champagne is meant to be drank and savored, not to be spilled in vain!

:headbang:
rocknation

[jmowreader]

8. I like this one better....

http://www.shardsoglass.com

[rocktivity]

15. And don't forget the Dihydrogen Monoxide menace

http://www.dhmo.org/facts.html

...Some of the known perils of Dihydrogen Monoxide are:

* Death due to accidental inhalation...
* ...(can cause) severe tissue damage...(as a)...solid..
* ...can cause severe burns...(as a)...gas...
* ...a major component of acid rain
* Contributes to soil erosion
* Leads to corrosion and oxidation of many metals
* Contamination of electrical systems...
* ...decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes
* Often associated with killer cyclones...
* ...a suspected contributor to the El Nino weather effect

:headbang:
rocknation

[Angelus]

10. Aw geez...

there is some nutcases out there, isn't there?

I've never read anything more ludicrous in my entire life than what I have just read. :eyes:

[tom_paine]

12. I think it's a Parody Site

[Angelus]

13. Really?

It's hard to tell if people are being serious or not. :shrug:

[tom_paine]

14. I don't know for sure. But I do know this

I let my Sister-In-Law get me very worked up and upset about some hidoeus animal abuse called "Bonsai Kitty", where kittens were intubated at both ends and allowed to grow inside jars to shape them like "Bonsai Trees"...hence the name.

Of course, it was a Parody Site.

Check www.snopes.com for a debunking of this. If it's not there yet, keep checking periodically...it will be.

[BigMcLargehuge]

11. 2.People watching football eat unhealthy foods, especially teenagers.

I wonder what they taste like... LOL