If making a lot of money in life is not a priority to you...

[terrya]

does that mean you're a failure?

Seriously.

I want a life where I'm comfortable. Nothing more.

[turiya]

1. im a failure

and I don't mind.

[Bertha Venation]

7. welcome to DU, turiya

:hi:

[Political_Junkie]

2. If I was to die a rich woman,

I would consider myself a moral failure.

[wysimdnwyg]

3. Depends

If you ask my Mom, money is not the scale, happiness is.

If you ask my "top-20 percent" sister (SHE used that term), money is the scale.

But then, my sister is ridiculously right on money issues.

[apnu]

15. "top-20 percent" what is that supposed to mean?

you lost me there.

[wysimdnwyg]

17. "Top 20 percent"

Of income. We had a long discussion about Bush's tax policies. She doesn't want to lose her tax breaks. She thinks it's fair for her to get 70% of her exorbitant salary, while someone making minimum wage gets 75% of theirs.

[theivoryqueen]

4. sounds very peaceful

if your basic needs are met and you are happy without stress or greed or worry or materialism... You are having a good life.

[terrya]

14. The last thing in the world I want to do is to turn into George W. Bush.

Here's a man who's wealthy. Who is extremely wealthy. Who never has to worry about money or financial problems. Ever.

He's an immoral scumbag...along with the whole family...partly because they've accumlated a vast fortune. Because it's money, money, money.

I don't want to be some uncaring, cold person who's indifferent to anything except making money. And I think that a lot of rich people are like that.

[theivoryqueen]

19. "Born on third and thinks he hit a triple"

from Ms Molly I. Yep, lots of the wealthy folks I have worked with have been rather indifferent to social and moral issues. Can't fathom how they stay so removed. Maybe they are lacing evian with lithium.

[Bertha Venation]

5. Oh, hell no, Terry.

If money is the most important thing to you, IMO there's something wrong. I could list all the bromides but I won't -- everyone knows them.

I just want enough to get by, and if I don't have enough, I know how to be content with what I have. I imagine you're the same way.

[terrya]

23. I feel like a failure, Bertha.

I look at some of the people here at DU, for instance. There are people who brag about buying the newest, the latest, the greatest. New cars, HDTV's....and I'm not like them. I'm not ever going to be like them. Which means there's something wrong with me.

It's all about money in this life. It's all about having it all...the things, the bank accounts. And if you don't have any of that...then you're a loser. Simple as that.

Honey, don't worry about me. I need to get this out of my system.

Thank you.
Terry

[tigereye]

24. I have never made a lot of money

I have always worked for non-profits. Having enough is enough. I always tell my son how fortunate most Americans are in terms of what they have access to. No one is a failure related to income... you have to pick what you love to do and feel good about the work that enables you to have a clear conscience and sleep at night.

So on that level my life and anyone else with a similar view ( work to live) IS a success. I have a great partner and a child and really as much as I could want. ( other than wanting to be a jazz drummer and tour Europe, but maybe in my next incarnation!)

[Donkeyboy75]

25. Success and failure should be defined by the individual.

I don't think there's anything wrong with making a lot of money if it's done ethically and without screwing people. I get a bit tired on this forum (and I'm not pointing at you) of seeing rich = evil. That's simply not true. It's also not true that somebody is automatically noble because they have little money.

*Disclaimer: I make $20,000 a year, so I'm certainly not rich.

Each person should define success on their own terms. It sounds like you are trying to, but the fact that you will never be rich bothers you. Is it because you wish you had money, or because you are bothered by the consumer-driven culture we live in?

[terrya]

26. But what happened to noblisse oblilge?

The idea that if you were blessed with wealth, you were expected to give something back to the world?

I don't see that today. It's just "fuck you, I've got mine"

Terry

[Donkeyboy75]

27. I don't think it's changed much.

Carnegie was a great philanthropist 100 years ago, and there are great ones today such as Soros, Gates and Ted Turner (regardless of what you think of them individually, they do give back).

There were rich assholes during the Great Depression, and there are rich assholes now.

:hi:

[Unperson 309]

30. It's All In How You look at It...

F'rinstance, I'm *never* gonna drive a new car. Ever.
But I have a beloved older auto that is becoming a classic.

I rent instead of own.
But when the roof goes, I don't have to pay to fix it!

If someone is my friend I *KNOW* they aren't just after my dough! :)

Here's one way to feel better... get a string of beads, say worry beads or a rosary or something like that. Start at one end and name a blessing you have. Just to get you started, here are a few:

The blue sky above
Birdsong
Children laughing outside
Kitten fur
The feel of clothing fresh out of the dryer
Finding that dollar in the laundry
Laughing at Jon Stewart
That kiss you gave your partner when they left this morning.

et cetera... The simplest, most picayune stuff can be a blessing if you look for it.

When we can lie down at night and count all those blessings, who can call us a failure?

309

[Bertha Venation]

31. Yep. It's all about money. IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT.

I got a bonus at work today, and a call from out of the blue from someone I hardly know, offering me two free tickets to the Angels vs Orioles at Camden Yards this Saturday night. Guess which one meant more to me? Yep, the baseball tickets. I like the money, too, because it means we can pay some desperately overdue bills and still not have to limit ourselves to one beer each at the ballgame.

That's the kind of thing that's important to me. Being caught up is more important than getting ahead of the crowd. Enjoying myself is more important than the never-ending, culturally-imposed National Grab. And listening to the frogs and a whippoorwill outside, and Mrs. V. in the front room, cheering the Angels as they whip the Yanks --these things are life.

You will get it out of your system, and whatever you decide you need in your life will come to you with contentment. :hug:

[Piperay]

6. No, it means that

you are lucky. You won't always be seeking something that is always elusive and never enough.

[Lisa0825]

8. If all you want in life is to be comfortable,

then you are already a success, because you have your priorities in life in order.

[trof]

9. If making a lot of money in life is not a priority to you...

Would you send all the extra to me?
Thank you.
;-)

[HFishbine]

10. Some would say

the less one attaches to wordly things, the more succesful one is.

[buddhamama]

11. i don't feel like a failure

i learned a long time ago the difference between need and want. i live simply and i am comfortable. that isn't to say though, that the occupations we enjoy can't give us both, money and personal fulfillment.

[Bonhomme Richard]

12. No your not...If you make..................

a lot of money and your kids don't talk to you....then your a failure.
There is a huge trade off to making a lot of money and if you are not lucky you can lose your soul.
About 20 yrs. ago I was making about $70,000, traveled all over, away every two weeks, missed the kids concerts, and was miserable. Quit the job and took a $20,000 pay cut. Best decision I ever made.
Went and joined a rock band
Got a boat
Spent a lot of time with the family
Started my own business.
Nuff said
Enjoy life.

[apnu]

13. I agree with you...

... I could care less about money. At best, to me, its only a tool. No more or less attractive than a hammer or my computer's mouse. All I want are things that make me and my family happy. A roof over our heads in a safe place to live, food in the pantry, heat in the winter, and a few bucks extra to catch a movie from time to time.

Most people that I know, consder someone who isn't greed based, (a gold digger, money hog, corporate suit, general cash whore would be greed based IMO) as some kind of leaper.

terrya, you aren't a leaper...

Breaking away from this stupid, f**ked up, consumer based economy will go miles and miles towards general improvement for our culture and country.

consumer based societies are doomed to fail, and to all you economists out there that disagree and will cry havoc and release the dogs of war upon me, bugger off! I'm right on this one... our society has bread a class of cash sucking vampires and no good comes of it.

[Penndems]

16. No

It means that you've got your priorities straight. :)

(edited for typo)

[Rowdyboy]

18. Oh, God, no

just means your priorities are in order.

I wasn't born to money. I made a comfortable life for myself. If I had more money, I'd spend every penny of it traveling. Instead, Iread National Geographic and Smithsonian and watch the Discovery Channel.

My only extravagance is eating out.

[SOteric]

20. It depends on who is doing the defining.

But in my book, no. I define failure and success by different yardsticks.

[H2O Man]

21. I don't want to be

rich my whole life, but the rest of it would be okay. I was raised in a poor family; was homeless as a teen; and have had a few scrapes with near poverty as an adult. It's not romantic or fun. I'm not rich now, and don't see it heading my way in the future. But I do not want that which I have now, taken away from me due to the greed of the bush-type people. I'm well-off in comparison to most people in human history. I have a wife and four children. I feel rich, indeed.

[Champ]

22. Money isn't necessarily a top priority

But money rules the world so obviously I need it. I want to be comfortable and have financial security for me and my family. Only thing I really want, other then that I don't need much.

[Pithlet]

28. Same here.

Enough money to not have to worry about the bills is perfect. Anything above that is just superfluous. It's nice to have those extra things, and I do have some (Like cable, extra car, laptop, things like that), but not really necessary for happiness, at least for me.

[Unperson 309]

29. Nope.

I have two jobs, both light work and easy, I make under $1500/month and I don't sweat it. Why? Because the things I enjoy the most are not bought with money.

If you are loved, if you are content, if you have the basics and you are enjoying life, then no, you aren't a failure.

309

[Nikia]

32. I am trying to remember the quote

I believe that it was said by some Jewish rabbi. It goes something like this:
"Who is rich? The man who is happy with what he has."

[Waverley_Hills_Hiker]

33. comfortable is ok with me...ive even turned down promotions...

...im happy with where Im at...

[Kat45]

34. Not at all.

I believe that making a lot of money in life should not be a priority for people. Money is necessary to live, unfortunately, but other than needing it for basic necessities, it is not important at all. The important things in life are love, compassion, kindness, how one treats other people.

[Seeking Serenity]

35. I don't want to live my life

working my ass off to reach the horizon (that bigger house, that swankier car, better shit than my neighbours have), because you never get there.

If I had a choice between lots o' money and high stress or little money and low stress, I'd definitely take the latter.

(Can you have lots o' money and low stress? Seems like those with lots and stressed about making more of it or keeping what they've got.)