What do I put on my Kerry yard sign to discourage stealing?

[Misunderestimator]

Based on the suggestions from my thread on the same subject, these are some options I am considering to spread on the back of my Kerry yard sign to nab the thief who took my last one:

[djeseru]

1. Anything with a foul smell...

...should do it. :evilgrin:

[Rabrrrrrr]

2. Methyl violet, I say - but I also love the poop idea

problem with poop is that it dires out, so unless they steal the sign same day, your SOL, so to speak. Unless you're willing to refecate each day.

[Misunderestimator]

5. REFECATE LOL n/t

[Rabrrrrrr]

8. Heh heh - thanks!

I invented that word while I was typing. It's all yours!

[zbdent]

16. Refecate Bush

that ought to confuse them.

[Ediacara]

3. Other

Pins pointing up... the same technique museums use to discourage birds from landing (and crapping) on them.

[Loonman]

4. Vaseline on the post

You can't see it.

[11 Bravo]

6. A library card.

That should scare the shit out of them!

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

7. The words "THOU SHALT NOT STEAL"

for the fundi's that want Kerry to lose so they can plaster the 10 commandments everywhere.

[Misunderestimator]

9. Oh, that's a good one.... Use their weapons against them mmm hmm

[theivoryqueen]

10. glue n/t

[DoverFrank]

11. A big dog?

The best defense is a great big, viscious, biting animal.

[EstimatedProphet]

12. Plutonium

Powdered plutonium, or plutonium in solution. People will get the idea if every time someone goes near the sign, their hair and teeth fall out.

[VTMechEngr]

13. A sign...Owner has .357 and itchy trigger finger.

Works in VB.

[Ruby Romaine]

14. LSD

[riverwalker]

15. skunk oil

can buy it at outdoors store

[AngryAmish]

17. Poooooooooooooooooooooo

[Failure]

18. put a little disclaimer*

Anyone attempting to steal, deface, or otherwise mess with my sign will be "liberated"


failure.

[Misunderestimator]

20. Oh yeah, that's good

I'm leaning toward a little axle grease mixed with red dye, the message will be a good addition.

[Failure]

23. :D thank you...nt

[northzax]

19. simple,

surround the sign with a series of american Flags, suspended in such as way that they do not obscure the sign, or touch the ground, but that removal of the sign will cause the flag to touch the ground or be trod upon.

although if you're in the south, you might want to try this with the Flag of American treason as well.

[Misunderestimator]

21. Another great idea.

This yard sign is becoming a freaking work of art!!! :)

[TXlib]

22. A warning that the yard is monitored by IR video camera.

Better yet, get the IR camera, and post no warning, so when he does it, you can take the video to the police.

Or post the sign inside a window, preferably 2nd floor. And combine with a camera to catch the lout if he throws a rock through your window.

[Misunderestimator]

24. You guys are great... another good idea

I think the warning should probably be enough. Whoever stole the sign wouldn't have the mental capacity to assume that it's not true.

[ronnykmarshall]

25. It's all about the cat poop!

Need some extra??

[Misunderestimator]

26. No please.... I have enough to clean out already

It's amazing how much this cat produces. :)

[Bertha Venation]

30. oh, god, Ronny, you ain't right!!

:7

[ronnykmarshall]

34. Isn't that a hoot.

One of our DU'er made that for me.

[Debi]

27. How about a photo of Bush?

They will think you're supporting him...and only know the difference if they can read!!

[GoddessOfGuinness]

28. Rub hot peppers all over it.

Make sure your hands are gloved. They won't realize that the oil is on their hands until they take a wizz...

[Misunderestimator]

33. Oh man... I think I like that one...

A blend of capsaicin and vaseline or grease. I have a picture in my head right now that is making me ROFL.

[Blue Gardener]

46. Isn't there some hot pepper stuff at the garden centers?

It's to keep the varmints out of the garden. Maybe it would work for the two legged kind. I know there is a sprinkler that is motion-activated so when the deer come in the garden they get a good soaking. You would need to videotape that so we could all see it. Just picturing it brightens up my day.

[Bertha Venation]

29. Dig a small hole beneath it and fill it with water.

The swarms of mosquitoes may deter the morans stealing your sign.

[Misunderestimator]

31. LOL... good one.

[CO Liberal]

32. High-Voltage Wiring

:-)

[Misunderestimator]

35. OK... Here's what I am going with...

Grease mixed with red dye and a message that says:

Do you know that it is a crime to steal?
Thou Shalt Not Steal
By the way... you are being videotaped.

[arwalden]

36. A Claymore & Trip Wire? A Guard Dog? Poisonous Spines?

A 20 foot pit filled with spikes and vipers?

-- Allen

[Misunderestimator]

37. YES... when I have a little time...

I will build a moat around my sign and bring in some gators.

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[Misunderestimator]

40. Well, um... sure... I will put a sign next to it

asking for DU donations... that should work. :bounce:

I've been graced by the presence of Grovelbot on my thread.... woohoo!

[Endangered Specie]

39. Tri-nitro-toluene (TNT)

Fix it so a fuse is lit when if its pulled out of the ground.

[Canuckistanian]

41. Electrical wire attached to a high voltage generator

Works for squirrels, probably for Freepers as well.

[Misunderestimator]

42. I'm sure I'd get fined for that...

Gotta check my deed-restricted community handbook now...

[Canuckistanian]

45. Don't think so

Just use a high voltage, very low current AC or pulse type generator. Very annoying, no danger of killing. Unless you're Dick Cheney (America's First Battery Operated Vice-President!)

[arwalden]

43. Poison IVY Resin!!! Seriously... It might not prevent the theft...

... but they'll regret it for a couple of weeks.

[Misunderestimator]

44. The problem is in the mining of it....

Where the heck can I get it without infecting myself?