Who's your musical antichrist?

[Bossy Monkey]

And doesn't that sound like something a server at a restaurant would say? "Hi I'm Chad and I'll be your musical antichrist this evening." No? Ok, nevermind!

Want to put on ABBA, of course, but I've already drawn the bitter lesson that I'm the last ABBA-hater left on Earth. However, you could warm the cockles of my black, black heart by posting them as your Other reply.

There probably ought to be some kind of minimum career length criterion for this, but what the hey-- bad is bad no matter how long they've been at it.

Edit: just killed a stray question mark

'nother edit: killed one Britney, added Beely Jo-el just for NightTrain

[bubblesby2002]

1. There should be a category for all of the above

Because they all stink.

[freetobegay]

2. Britney

Is the worst!!! If I haven't made it clear yet, Britney Is the worst!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Deja Q]

8. I second Britt-Brat!

Talentless harpie who makes a far greater mockery of the sanctity of marriage than any homosexual couple would...

"Oops, I did it again!" :puke:

[freetobegay]

10. LOL

eom

[NoPasaran]

3. OK, I admit that I live in a cave

And I was raised by wolves...
But who is this William Hung guy and why does he deserve a Five Minute Hate?

[Bossy Monkey]

9. I live in the next cave over, but apparently he was an Am. Idol contestant

who was really, REALLY bad, who has parlayed his notoriety from the show into a momentarily successful recording career.

[lapfog_1]

4. John Ashcroft. nuff said

[bloodyjack]

15. John Ashcroft, musical antichrist?

"nuff said"? hardly! enlighten us.

[Bossy Monkey]

19. He writes horrible 'patriotic' songs, forces DoJ employees to sing them

I'll try to add a link on edit.

Edit: See? http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=104&topic_id=1395398#1395504

[bloodyjack]

23. lol . . . LET THE EAGLE SOAR

"Have you heard the song? It really sucks."

[stopbush]

5. Placido Domingo - the great *fakir* of the classical music world.

Haven't been able to stand him since about 1970...

[Mika]

6. KC of KC & the Sunshine Band and KC & the Sunshine Band

Did I mention KC & the Sunshine Band?

:puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke:

[Menshevik]

7. any country music singer

[Spider Jerusalem]

22. Even Johnny Cash?

Come on. Johnny singlehandedly redeems the label of "country music singer".

[argyl]

29. If you mean the trash that passes for C&W these days I can agree.However,

much of what was once considered country is now called Americana,a form of music I dearly love.

[pscot]

11. The Bee Gees

Falsetto is best reserved for contra-tenors interpreting 17th century French and English court music. Web sites devoted to the BeeGees are appropriately icky.

[salvorhardin]

12. You hate ABBA?

I've never heard such a thing!

Seriously though, hate Abba as you may, they had a knack for writeing witty little ditties (sorry, couldn't resist the wordplay). I hate Barry Manilow with a passion, but he and Abba, at least have (had?) musical talent. Britney Spears on the other hand, is a talentless hack.

[NightTrain]

13. Billy fucking Joel!!!

:grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke::grr::nuke:

[Bossy Monkey]

18. I actually like Billy, but curiously, he was the inspiration for the poll

Lemme see what I can do with an edit. (Don't really need two Britney replies, after all)

[Taverner]

14. ABBA HATERS UNITE!

I F'n hate those swedish prozac junkies!

Almost got forced into seeing Mama Mia too! Luckily I feigned death and got out of it...

[Kellanved]

16. Well

We have Dieter Bohlen, and frankly I don't know of one American note-abuser who can compete :hi: .

[Bossy Monkey]

17. Well there's Hasselhoff, who was one of the first hits when I googled

"musical antichrist"

[Kellanved]

20. uhhmm...good point

:puke:
Guess I forgot about Hasselhoff. Probably because it is possible to watch TV and listen to the radio for months without getting subjected to his "talent". However, Bohlen is ominpresent in the German media.

[Spider Jerusalem]

21. Kenny G, no question.

Anyone who thinks that lame, sorry excuse for a saxophonist has one iota of talent, or can actually with a straight face be called a jazz musician, needs to be locked in a small room and submitted to an intensive process of re-education consisting of exposure to the complete ouvres of such musicians as John Coltrane, Charlie Parker, Lester Young, Cannonball Adderley, Ornette Coleman, Rahsaan Roland Kirk, and a couple of dozen others whose reeds Kenny G isn't fit to change.

[Feanorcurufinwe]

24. Why Pat Metheny hates Kenny G

kenny g is not a musician i really had much of an opinion about at all until recently. there was not much about the way he played that interested me one way or the other either live or on records. i first heard him a number of years ago playing as a sideman with jeff lorber when they opened a concert for my band. my impression was that he was someone who had spent a fair amount of time listening to the more pop oriented sax players of that time, like grover washington or david sanborn, but was not really an advanced player, even in that style. he had major rhythmic problems and his harmonic and melodic vocabulary was extremely limited, mostly to pentatonic based and blues- lick derived patterns, and he basically exhibited only a rudimentary understanding of how to function as a professional soloist in an ensemble - lorber was basically playing him off the bandstand in terms of actual music. but he did show a knack for connecting to the basest impulses of the large crowd by deploying his two or three most effective licks (holding long notes and playing fast runs - never mind that there were lots of harmonic clams in them) at the keys moments to elicit a powerful crowd reaction (over and over again) . the other main thing i noticed was that he also, as he does to this day, play horribly out of tune - consistently sharp.

<snip>

but when kenny g decided that it was appropriate for him to defile the music of the man who is probably the greatest jazz musician that has ever lived by spewing his lame-ass, jive, pseudo bluesy, out-of-tune, noodling, wimped out, fucked up playing all over one of the great louis's tracks (even one of his lesser ones), he did something that i would not have imagined possible. he, in one move, through his unbelievably pretentious and calloused musical decision to embark on this most cynical of musical paths, shit all over the graves of all the musicians past and present who have risked their lives by going out there on the road for years and years developing their own music inspired by the standards of grace that louis armstrong brought to every single note he played over an amazing lifetime as a musician. by disrespecting louis, his legacy and by default, everyone who has ever tried to do something positive with improvised music and what it can be, kenny g has created a new low point in modern culture - something that we all should be totally embarrassed about - and afraid of. we ignore this, "let it slide", at our own peril.

his callous disregard for the larger issues of what this crass gesture implies is exacerbated by the fact that the only reason he possibly have for doing something this inherently wrong (on both human and musical terms) was for the record sales and the money it would bring.

More: http://www.lesharris.net/kennyg.htm

[Taverner]

33. OMG Pat Metheny is DA MAN

I saw him live once...never will you see such an amazing guitarist...

And I agree with him 100% on this

[Adenoid_Hynkel]

25. Kid Rock

for ressurecting sexist, mysogynistic, frat-boy cock-rock

[Mr. Blonde]

26. Wait a sec.

I like Kid Rock and yet despise frats, how does that work out? You have to admire a guy who has no looks, no talent and yet parlays that package into a multi-million dollar career.

[AntiCoup2K4]

27. Sammy Hagar is the musical antichrist!

Jello Biafra put it this way 20 years ago....

See the Aryan bozo with the red guitar
Parachute on the White House lawn
Gonna bomb the commies with his air guitar
So dumb he can't drive 55

Like Bing Crosby before them
GOVERNMENT MUSIC
Too idiotic to be real
GOVERNMENT MUSIC
You want it loud?
We'll make sure it goes nowhere
So you won't get ideas

Soon after that song was written, Sammy Hagar had destroyed the greatest American rock band in history, neutering them into a top 40 cheese ballad factory :mad:

He's also a Bush campaign contributor, best friends with Ted the Neanderthal Nugent, and wears fucking yellow capri pants on stage with logos of his own brand of tequila all over them. That's $50 a bottle tequila, mind you?

For a guy who called himself the "Red Rocker" he's one hell of a capitalist. :puke:

Oh yeah.... Van Hagar is touring this year. Sponsored by Clear Channel, naturally :eyes:

[voter x]

28. John Mayer

Your Body is a Wonderland??????/
:puke: :nuke:

[mvd]

30. None of the above

Michel Bolton for his screeching.

[Bossy Monkey]

31. I think he richly qualifies for "more lungs than talent" n/t

[RogueTrooper]

32. The Lighthouse Family

Just awful mediocre rubbish.