Metro Weekly: Exposing the Ex-Gay Myth

[La_Serpiente]

Exposing the Ex-Gay Myth

It's fun to laugh at John Paulk, the former drag queen turned ex-gay poster boy who made the spectacularly bad decision to stop by Mr. P's in September of 2000. But the man who snapped the picture of the erstwhile homosexual fleeing the scene of his temptation, Wayne R. Besen, doesn't think the ex-gay movement is any laughing matter.

That picture of Paulk graces the cover of Besen's new book, Anything But Straight: Unmasking the Scandals and Lies Behind the Ex-Gay Myth. Besen is criss-crossing the country promoting both his book and the idea that the gay and lesbian movement has to deal with the myth of "transformation" in order make real, lasting progress.

Gay marriage, military service, equal employment, hate crimes legislation: victory on any or all of these "is contingent on people not believing it's a choice," Besen says, pointing to polls that show "people who believe homosexuality is a simple choice like choosing what kind of cereal to eat for breakfast are less likely to support gay rights."

Besen says that anti-gay politicians and activists are using the ex-gay movement -- a collection of ministries and programs that offer to "cure" people of their homosexuality through a combination of Christian prayer and support groups -- to keep that idea of choice and homosexuality alive at dinner tables across middle America.

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Exposing the Ex-Gay Myth

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

1. Hasn 't science proven

that there is a physiological difference between gays and straights? That's what I've read. Of course, the people who think you can "change" someone from their lifestyle probably also think the earth is flat.

[La_Serpiente]

2. yeah

Switching is just as easy as changing the shampoo you use/ sarcasm off :eyes:

[LeahMira]

4. Why?

the people who think you can "change" someone from their lifestyle...

Why on earth would anyone want to change someone else anyhow? Let those people work on themselves and leave other people alone.

[spinbaby]

5. What does it matter?

It doesn't matter if it's physiological or not. Who you choose to have sex with is no one's business but your own and your partner's.

[gator_in_Ontario]

3. From personal experience...

it is not a choice

[DeepModem Mom]

6. Welcome to DU, gator --

[newyawker99]

7. Hi gator_in_Ontario!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[Selwynn]

8. People DO change

But usually that change is from something that wasn't really them to something that is.

I had a friend who claimed to be gay in his 20s. I supported him of course, and continued to be a good friend to him. But secretly inside I had my doubts. He had been through several bad breakups with girls he had really loved, and I honestly thought his announcement had more to do with his emotional wounds that to do with any fundamental revelation about himself.

But I don't get to make that call, so I did nothing but love him and support him. Well, he's married now, to a lovely woman and I've never seen him happier.

The problem is that people sometimes recognize they've been "playing" straight while being gay or "playing" gay while actually being straight and then "change" to finally embrace who they really are - and when that happens different groups of people latch on to those examples and say all kinds of ridiculous and horrible things.