I Will Vote For Bush If:

[ThomWV]

What stunt could the boy pull that would cause me to vote for him?

If he were to actually pilot the Shuttle on a mission, that might do it.

[wryter2000]

1. Shuttle

Only if the shuttle mission was one-way.

[WindRavenX]

2. Never

Ever
Ever
He stands for the opposite of everything I live for: honor, accountability, and a strive to improve the human and non human condition on this planet.
A vote for him would destry my soul.

[pmbryant]

3. He could renounce everything his administration has done to this date

And fire everyone and replace his cabinet and sub-cabinet etc with people who we could actually trust (i.e., non-ideologues).

Alas, even then, I could not vote for him as his lies have gone on too long by this point. But I do want to encourage him to do the right thing anyway.

If only.

--Peter

[mandyky]

4. Nothing he could do to make me vote for him

Total persona non grata

[otohara]

5. Confesed He Lied About Everything Iraq & Stole Election

nope...can't do, he's got to go

[ixion]

6. Never ever ever... not in a billion years

would I vote for that worthless excuse for a human being ( and I use the term 'human being' in the widest possible sense).

[charlie]

7. If he was running for Prime Minister of Pluto n/t

[Hippo_Tron]

16. or France...

[goobergunch]

24. Prime Minister or President? (n/t)

[ThomWV]

8. Stupid Bush Stunts

Actually I was just thinkin' about the hair-ball's landing on the aircraft carrier and it got me to thinking about his stunts. He figgured it got him votes but he didn't do enough to get me to his side. Then I thought to myself, well, hell, if he could take the space Shuttle and land it, himself, on an aircraft carrier, well, shit, I'd vote for him - - on that very cold day in hell.

Anyway my point was to see what folks could come up with as stupid Bush stunts.

Thom

[WhoCountsTheVotes]

9. ... the voting machines are programmed to count my vote for Bush

:)

[goobergunch]

10. If he got a brain transplant

with a liberal.

[Hippo_Tron]

15. I still wouldn't vote for him then... n/t

[doubleplusgood]

54. don't you mean brain IMPLANT ?

n/t

[NicoleM]

11. I would vote for him

for baseball commissioner, if it meant he would never ever be POTUS again. That's the job he really wants, anyway.

[West Coast Democrat]

12. If Bush* were running for dog catcher in Crawford, TX

and running unopposed.

[boxster]

13. I'll vote for Bush if I vote for the Dem and my vote gets changed.

That's the only way.

[oasis]

14. When pigshit actually pilots a fighter jet in combat.

[Nobody]

17. I'd vote for Bush if

He and I were both contestants in a Survivor-type reality TV show and the vote was for the next person to be voted off the island.

[LynneSin]

18. I'd vote for Bush if....

someone blungeoned me over the head and went in my place to vote who's sole intention was to vote for Bush.

Or if they go to Black Box voting in Delaware - then I may be voting for the guy and not realize it.

[DiverDave]

19. If I fell on my head.

sustaining a severe head injury.

[karlschneider]

20. I'll vote for him when he runs for something

posthumously.

[GumboYaYa]

21. That is so incomprehensible that I

can not even think of a smartass response to show there is no way I would ever vote for Bush. I'm just flabbergasted at the thought.

[Bandit]

22. If that is what it takes to get you to vote for the leader of the USA

I truly feel sorry for you. Your shallowness is abhorrent.

[kayleybeth]

23. NEVER!!!!!

He will never get my vote. Not ever.

[branch]

25. Good question hillbilly.

1. I was a crooked CEO looking to rob my multi-million dollar companies pension plan.

2. I was a crooked CEO looking for a new country to rape of its natural resources then do response number one.

[Zynx]

26. I would if...

it was a contest between him and Crown Prince Abdullah of Saudi Arabia.;-) That would be a race to determine who is more evil.

[Gato Moteado]

27. actually, you have no choice......

...because of the electoral college, anyone in a red state voted for bush no matter what name they punched on the ballot. furthermore, everyone in florida voted for bush despite the fact that al gore really got more votes there.

the electoral college really needs to go.

[Hubert Flottz]

28. This Boy From WV Would ...................................................

Drink a gallon of Buzzard Puke And Die Of The Dribbiling Shits, Before I'd Vote For That No Good Bottom Feeding Bastard!

[DemCam]

30. Hey, Hubert....

Good to see you are still in good form here. And still giving us all a good laugh.

(In my other life on some of those other boards...I was just plain Cam. :hi:)

[Hubert Flottz]

36. Hi Cam, Welcome To DU!

GREAT to have you here! Hope everything is going good for you and yours!

[calimary]

29. I will vote for bush to take a lie detector test and go under oath, and

then to testify in criminal court. Yep, I'd vote for that in a heartbeat. I'd also like to be on the jury so I could vote again...

[Lindacooks]

31. NEVER

eom

[BeatleBoot]

32. Count Me Out!

Never Ever Ever Ever - Ever.

Bush is a Fink! Cheney sleeps with a nightlight!

[mindfulNJ]

33. If he picked Al Gore as a running mate...

and then signed a suicide pact effective if he wins...so in a word...NOTHING!

[rman]

34. ok so you'r being very cynical?

if so: nice one.
could be one of mine, after a few more beers.

[knight_of_the_star]

35. If he jumped off the Golden Gate bridge

with cement shoes on, but I don't think he would be in a condition to be voted for if he did that though ;).

[eleny]

37. he forced me into having a lobotomy

[City Lights]

38. Not me. Not ever.

He's a worthless piece of slime.

[Taxi Driver]

39. I'll take this question seriously.

If Lieberman ran against him and if he publicly apologized for Iraq, radically passed import tariffs, fired Ashcroft and balanced the budget. In other words, if his platform was more liberal than his oppositions's (duh). But I can twiddle my thumbs waiting for that to happen.

[zeemike]

40. Well if hell froze over…

I hope no one got that first.

[Junkdrawer]

41. If he throws his body on an exploding grenade and thus save...

a platoon of US soldiers. I mean how could I NOT reward such bravery?

[Astarho]

42. Well, if it was Bizarro World

and the Republicans were the good guys, left is right, up is down and a goateed Al Gore ran things with an iron fist.

"Mr. Daschle, your agonizer please!"

[hlthe2b]

43. Bush was declared (officially) mentally incompetent AND

power of attorney for all his pResidential and othe official decisions was given to the Big DOG Clinton.

In other words, when hell freezes over....

[Postman]

44. If I were a rich fascist...yada, da,da,da,da,da,da,da,da,da,da,dum.

sung to the tune of Fiddler enrON the Roof

[Romberry]

45. I would vote for Bush...

...if and only if A) one of his brownshirts is literally holding a gun to my head or B) they have my fourteen year old daughter locked in the next room with Ahnuld.

[Nlighten1]

46. If I have a tiger bite my head off first

it might get me to vote for bush

[0rganism]

47. Sorry, he could pilot the Starship Enterprise and I'd still vote him out

He SUCKS.

Big time.

[Selwynn]

48. his 2004 running mate was Bill Clinton >:) (nt)

[janekat]

49. They change the constitution and he runs against Arnie...

Sorry - I could not have a rapist pig for a President...

[Andy_Stephenson]

50. Only under pain of death

even then I would have to think about it.

[stlsaxman]

51. Only if Diebold votes for me...

and that very well may happen.

[the_real_38]

52. Joe Lieberman gets the Democratic Nomination...

... they're not taking over my party, too.

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

62. Who is they?

Are you buying into some Zionist Neocon conspirancy

Lieberman is not my preference but I'll take him over Bush.

[onecitizen]

53. Never,none, ever, nothing, zero, it would.........

NEVER happen from me!! EVER!!

[mkregel]

55. If he were to give a speech...

denouncing his entire administration, all who funded him and said he was going to use this opportuunity to right the wrongs of the past 4 years..
and even then i would be skeptical

[tom_paine]

56. Nothing.

The damage he and his minions have done far exceeds my wildest nightmares already.

Nothing.

If Ferdinand Marcos or his son Bong-Bong Marcos was the only other choice for Emperor/Vice-Emperor...I'd not vote.

[Trahurn]

57. That's fuuny

OMG you nailed me on that one. I was prepared to write a choice reply to someone saying the would actully vote for Bush.

[MODemocrat]

58. I will vote for Bush if hell should happen to freeze over

There is nothing he could do to redeem himself in my opinion.
:freak: :dunce:

[leesa]

59. Why would that make you vote for him?? What the hell does that have

to do with being President? Part of the problem in the US is that we choose people based on crap logic and not on qualifications.

[are_we_united_yet]

60. If he resigns as President. EOM

[blondeatlast]

61. Not even if Hell froze over.