Being brought up by another thread, I would like to share something.

[MiniMandaRuth]

I recently posted on the thread 'What, if anything, could drive you to violence' and I responded with a story that happened about mid january at school.

I was, of course, just minding my own business. I had gotten a sandwich and a slushie (In mid January, I know...) and was sitting down at my table. Pretty soon, my friends thoughtful comments were drowned out by laughter and name calling. For a moment, i didn't realize that they were talking to me. They, being a group of teenage boys (Early fathers, popular jackasses, the lot), were talking about my religion in loud voices. I won't type some of their more hurtful comments but I will say that they called the Buddhists a bunch of 'gay wussies'.

I had enough, grabbed my seventy-five cent slushie, walked over to them, and promptly dumped the full cup of ice cold beverage on the leaders lap. I simply murmured 'idiot' and walked back to lunch table and said nothing more to any of the people around me.

A similar incident happened a few weeks before the end of school. A dear, dear, dear friend of mine got called 'gay' and a variety of other words that I shall not repeat here for fear of this message being deleted. My friend then responded to the taunting group of idiots with 'Hey, (My name here), c'mere for a second!' I then walked over to him and stood defensively at his side. He's very mild mannered nd a total sweetheart that would never hurt anyone. He grabbed my shoulder and held me close and then said, 'So, you guys are all enjoying each others company while I'm the only one with a beautiful woman next to me?' We then walked away and I felt as proud as I could for my friend. He comes from a very fristian family, and recently had told me of his sexual orientation.

Simply what I am trying to say is that the lack of tolerance in small towns is amazing, at least from the school point of view. People are publicly humiliated for their manner of dress and speech, learning ability and intelligence, and several other things. I know that you think that most kids at our school aren't like that, but they are.

In my school it is now very 'cool' to call something stupid 'gay' or someone that is stupid a 'faggot'. It angers me that I cannot take more action than telling a teacher about this. I have, and while my own teachers have taken actions within their own classrooms, the entire school district has NOT.

Washington state has a law against bullies, although I fear that many people are still being ridiculed by fellow students because of the supervisors. At least three teachers are fundies, and I have seen them look on while my friend hs been called a 'wuss' and 'a faggot'. I can stand up for myself, as I am still considerably physically stronger than most of the boys around me, but I worry for my friend who is, like I said, a pacifist who wouldn't hurt you if you called his Mom a whore.

I'm glad that soon I'll be out of this place called 'school', where people are 'encouraged' to act like they feel like, and are told that 'we can go to any teacher and tell our problems and they will be stopped'.

I have not told my Mother for fear that she will go to my school and talk about this. I feel that it is time that other students, black or white, hispanic or asian, tall or short, fat or thin, gay or straight, male or female, need to learn how to stick up for themselves. We need to fight back against the popular belief that it is cool to use 'gay' to describe something stupid, or that it is 'cool' to ridicule someone because of their religion or way of thinking! For many years, ever since society started, stronger people in bigger groups have prayed upon the smarter, more educated people like me. I had my backpack gone through a few times this year and people scribbled all over my binder because of my Kerry bumper sticker.

Anytime that you see a fellow student or co-worker, or just someone on the street being humiliated and ridiculed for their beliefs, intelligence, color of their skin, or sexual orientation, please help them out!

I put this thread in General Discussion because of the fact that people need to take this seriously!

Thank you for your time.

[ewagner]

1. It's because of young people like you

that I have ANY hope for the future.

Proud to know ya! :toast: :hug: :pals:

[glitch]

17. Second that. nt

:hug:

[marmar]

2. Very compelling...

Having grown in a diverse, relatively tolerant school setting, that's kind of eye opening. And kids don't just say and do those things in a vacuum, they come from families and societies that foster it. Stay strong, spread tolerance and if that fails, get the hell out. Seattle's just up the road!

[Maclilly]

3. Good for you.

I tell my daughters the same thing. Always stick up for yourself. If they get away with it once, they keep doing it.

[JuniperLea]

6. i told my daughter the same thing

she is fully prepared to kick someone in the nuts if need be:)

seriously, these are our children and this is what we have taught them. kids are very tollerant unless they are taught otherwise, either in actual instruction or by witnessing their parent's actions.

then there are people like me. i was raised in a family with a bigoted patriarch. i loved him dearly and his bigotry was the only thing ugly about him. it made an impression. i vowed to myself that my children would never see such ugliness. i'm proud to say when my kids are in their group of friends, it looks like a united nations meeting:)

this is one area of life where one person can make a difference.

keep up the good work, youngster! i'm glad you are here.

[packman]

4. The Budda would have said:

Row, row , row your boat
Gently down the stream
Merrily, merrily
Life is but a dream

Remember that scene in the movie where Harrison Ford is hiding out in an Amish community and some A-Holes from the local town gives them a hard time as they are riding in their buggies.
The old elder tells Harrison who is going up to the idiot to clock him, "That is not our way," and Harrison says, "Yes, but it is mine," and then smacks the crap out of the idiot.

We need warriors and peacemakers it seems.

[newyawker99]

11. Hi packman!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[Karenina]

5. Great post, MiniMandaRuth!

Welcome to DU!!! :hug:

[knowbody0]

7. welcome, MiniMandaRuth

excellent post.

[ismnotwasm]

8. I come from a world a violence.

And to this day, I can get rageful enough to want to physically hurt someone. Time and experience have tempered my impulses. But I will never, ever, stand and watch someone be abused. I have no problems telling someone off. I was watching a bunch of kindergarteners when my grandson was staying with me. I saw 4 or 5 little girls start to pick on one. The little girl screamed "leave me alone!" Boy did those little girls get a lecture. And it seems to start that early, that young. It's bullshit, and always has been. By the way, I hated high school. In fact, I didn't go. Long story.

[roguevalley]

9. you give me hope for the future, sweetie. You are a genuinely good

person at a young age. you have years of good doing ahead of you.

[freeplessinseattle]

10. Thank you AmandaRuth, beautifully said, much appreciated

I admire your gentle yet fiesty spirit and feel for you, that must be such a challenge to be around such mean-spirited idiots all day. Maybe you are helping to change the tone. I remember at the inauguration protest you were trying to encourage people to sing chants, I was too shy to start any chants but you sang out proudly, getting some people inspired. I have a ways to go to be so bold and put aside my own discomfort to forward the cause-one reason I don't like to phone-bank or doorbell-and I'm nearly 20 years older! Maybe you can be my mentor:)

[MiniMandaRuth]

12. You SAW me?!

Wow. Thanks. You should see me at school. I always do crazy things like that. Like wear a Kerry Me shirt and uh...

Beat Back Bush.

That's a good one.

[freeplessinseattle]

22. yeah, I was right beside you, but maybe didn't mention my

screen name. I was the petite, long haired chick with the Patriots for Peace sign who was hassled by the security at Westlake center. I was the one giving you ideas for chants but was too shy to start the singing myself, thanks for being so cool! Maybe we'll cross paths again sometime.

Keep fighting the good fight!!

[WLKjr]

13. You know what the difference will be in a few years

Take it from me, I have been out 2 years and have already had it proven to me.


I was always told that people like that never would go very far in life.....


and 2 years later they are making my pizza for me or paying me 50 bux to fix thier computer.......

and most of them never made it through the first year of college or got pregnant, married etc.



Trust me, it happens everywhere. Just make something of yourself.

[GreenPartyVoter]

14. Thanks. Another small towner here. *wave*

[donsu]

15. kick

nt

[progressoid]

16. When my daughter was about 10

she spouted the "thats so gay"once in front of me. My heart fell about a mile. How did my child come to say things like this? Well, apparently she got it from other kids that heard it on South Park. She had no idea how hurtful this was.

Growing up can be difficult but strong souls like you can make a difference!

[TexasLady]

18. What a thoughtful brave person you are

I was raised with the prejudice of gay bashing, and yet in the same breath told to love all races. I couldnt wrap my mind around that fundie thought from my parents.

I have caught my own kids throwing the terms' thats so gay' and' you faggot' and have had to jump on em. I know it comes from hearing it from school, but my reminders keep them in check.

and I can imagine how good that made you feel with your friend by your side, making that comment to the idiotboys. It amazes me how bullies don't have as much fun when they can't single someone out, and having a few friends around is a heap of help. The buddy system works for this just as well as it does for swimming, etc.

[proiowadem]

19. Last fall I did a paper on bigotry

It was called "Gayism the Silent Bigotry" during the paper a few freinds and I did an experiment in which we would during a normal conversation with people we would say "thats gay" in a derogitory way at least 5 times. We would then switch to "thats black" or some similar racial slur, 9 out of 10 times the person or persons we were talking to would either stop us or at least make a comment to the effect of "Don't say that, thats racist" My point being people people know that slurs are wrong just don't recognise that calling

[Ariana Celeste]

20. I dropped out of a WA school recently

3 years ago. And you are right. The districts and supervisors do *nothing*. Only certain teachers will put a stop to it in their classrooms, or defend you and put a stop to it, if it happens while they are walking by.

Now I'm bi (short for, who cares about gender? hehehe). And unfortunately, someone saw me kiss a girl. Considering I was goth with short spiky and colorful hair, I was already a target- but this spread like wildfire. I got taunted with every name you could imagine. I finally freaked out on a group of kids about it, started yelling at them and putting them in their place (or so I thought ;)) and then the Dean walked in and threatened me with suspension over it. It was at that point I decided I was leaving.

I regret dropping out now, but I couldn't handle the abuse anymore.

Anywho, good for you for standing up for yourself. And thank you for being a good friend to your pacifist buddy. I could have used a few people like you when I was in highschool, probably would have made the experience a bit easier to handle. :hug:

[MiniMandaRuth]

21. Yeah, friends that understand you really help

In fact, my pacifist buddy and his friend have really, really, really helped me out in some tight spots. We all look out for eachother.

I hope that you find some really good people, and continue your education!