Mr. Cranky: All The Way With Mary Kay

[Bark Bark Bark]

"Mr. Cranky" is a profane movie-review-humor site where the best movies still get at least ONE bomb. (He's "Cranky." Get it?)

The Crankster's recently added a new feature: "Mr. Cranky's Culture War!"

And maybe I've missed the outrage somewhere else--but "Cranky's Culture War" is the ONLY place I've seen ANYONE get pissed off about the celebrity status awarded to victim-marrying child-rapist Mary Kay LeTourneau by "Entertainment Tonight."

Thank you, Mr. Cranky.

http://www.mrcranky.com/movies/allthewaywithmarykay.html

I've found a wonderful and simple filter to find out who on the planet needs to be removed from it immediately to prevent their numerous, ignorant offspring from taking down the entire human race with them: If you watched or were interested in "Entertainment Tonight's" coverage of the Mary Kay LeTourneau wedding, please raise your hand. Now keep it up, so that we can find you, load you on a rocket ship and shoot it directly into the sun. I mean, send you on a magical space journey to a faraway planet where the beer is free and all the TV channels broadcast 24-hour topless NASCAR. A card will be showing up in the mail soon with information on where to park your Ford F150s and your mobile homes.

Due to editorial conventions that state, more or less, that a writer like myself must rehash the basics of a particular story so that the ignorant reader will know what the hell I'm talking about, here's the background in case you've been living in a cave for the last ten years: Sometime during June 1996, Mary Kay LeTourneau, a married schoolteacher and mother of four children, began an affair with her 13-year-old student, Vili Fualaau, a member of her sixth grade class. LeTourneau was arrested in March of 1997 on charges of second-degree rape of a child. At the time, she was pregnant with the first of their two children. She pleaded guilty and was sentenced to seven-and-a-half years in prison. Having no previous record, she only had to serve six months of the sentence, but was sent to serve her full term after ignoring orders to stay away from the apparently irresistible Fualaau. Even after the court ordered her to stop raping the boy, LeTourneau continued her so-called "love affair." Upon LeTourneau's release from prison, Fualaau, 21, had the order to keep her away from him dropped and now they're getting hitched.

(more...)

NOTE: Before anyone recommeds that I "chill out," I, in turn, recommend they first rewrite their justification of LeTourneau's actions with the genders reversed--so that it's about a MALE thirty-plus-year-old convicted rapist marrying his victim, who was thirteen at the time of the crime--then read said justification aloud at the next family dinner...ironically, about the same time ET will be airing. If you survive, let us know how it went.

And keep your hand raised.

[KitchenWitch]

1. I am with you 100%

There is still a fucked up power relationship between LeTourneau and her new hubby, I do not care what anyone says.

It would be TOTALLY different if the two parties involved met and hooked up when the youngest was at least 18 (preferably in their 20s)

[jmowreader]

2. Yeah, anyone who gets turned on by a sixth grader is OUT THERE!

The only reason anyone knows about this shit is because the rapist is a woman.

Male sixth-grade teacher rapes female student? Front-page news for about a month in the town it happened in, a couple of below-the-fold stories on the front page of the newspaper everywhere else (one at time of arrest, one at time of conviction). The guy will go to prison, and there won't be any of this "having no previous record" shit--he'll serve his full sentence and if he manages to survive prison (prisoners take an even dimmer view of child-rapists than society at large does) he'll have a huge "A Dangerous Sex Offender Lives In This House--Lock Up Your Daughters!" flashing neon sign mounted to the roof of his house.

Female sixth-grade teacher rapes male student? Entertainment Tonight!

Anyone got a half-gallon of bourbon? I could use that.