Anyone see the open letter from California to Bush?

[fishface]

Dear President Bush:

Congratulations on your victory over all us non-evangelicals. Actually, we're a bit ticked off here in California, so we're leaving.

California will now be its own country. And we're taking all the Blue States with us. In case you are not aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, and all of the North East. We spoke to God, and She agrees that this split will be beneficial to almost everybody, and especially to us in the new country of California. In fact, God is so excited about it, She's going to shift the whole country at 4:30 pm EST this Friday. Therefore, please let everyone know they need to be back in their states by then.

So you get Texas and all the former slave states. We get the Governator, stem cell research and the best beaches. We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay. (Okay, we have to keep Martha Stewart, we can live with that.)

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get OpryLand. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Stanford and Harvard. You get Old Miss.' We get 85% of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get all the technological innovation in Alabama. We get about two-thirds of the tax revenue, and you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our divorce rate is 22% lower than the Christian coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms to support, and we know how much you like that.

Did I mention we produce about 70% of the nation's veggies? But heck the only greens the Bible-thumpers eat are the pickles on their Big Macs.

Oh yeah, another thing, don't plan on serving California wine at your state dinners. From now on it's imported French wine for you. Ouch, bet that hurts.

Just so we're clear, the country of California will be pro-choice and anti-war. Speaking of war, we're going to want all Blue States citizens back from Iraq. If you need people to fight, just ask your evangelicals. They have tons of kids they're willing to send to their deaths for absolutely no purpose. And they don't care if you don't show pictures of their kids' caskets coming home.

Anyway, we wish you all the best in the next four years and we hope, really hope, you find those missing weapons of mass destruction. Seriously. Soon.

Sincerely,

California

[hiphop liberal]

1. god is neither she nor he

I would love it if California separated from the country, but that would most likely lead to a nasty civil war which would then lead to world war three and then the end of the world

[givemebackmycountry]

2. Hey HipHop

Glad you hip-hopped your way over here.

WELCOME to DU and hope you stick around for awhile!

Post frequently, laugh often, and have a good time!

Welcome to DU!


:hi:

[Skittles]

8. why do you want California separated from the country?

surely you'd get rid of Ahnold first?

[newyawker99]

15. Hi hiphop liberal!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[hfojvt]

3. Yeah, and it sorta ticked me off

so I looked up some numbers
what is 5,144,795 besides more than the population of Kansas and Nebraska combined?
It is the number of people in California who voted for Bush.
What is 2,828,723 besides about the population of Vermont, Rhode Island and New Hampshire combined?
It is the number of people in Texas who voted for Kerry.
1,477,122 = about the population of North and South Dakota combined and the number of Bush voters in Wisconsin.
1,304,844 = about the population of Montana and Wyoming combined and the number of Bush voters in Washington state.
2,756,904 = about the population of Arkansas and the number of Bush voters in Pennsylvania.
2,823,235 = about the population of Iowa and the number of Bush voters in New York.
2,336,253 = more than the number of eligible voters in Mississippi and the number of Illini who voted for Bush
2,310,803 = about the population of Utah and the number of Bush voters in Michigan.
So for the last time take the blue state arrogance and red state bashing and put it where the sun don't shine, which is usually Minnesota.

[Wonk]

4. Woohoo for Minnesota!

Take the red stater's arrogance and... (fill in the blank)

[Journeyman]

6. Thanks, hfojvt . . .

We're a purple nation and the sooner everyone appreciates that the happier we shall all be. Posts such as yours help show the reality of our variegated land.

Maybe its easier for me to see it: I'm a Californian living in one of the more conservative areas of the state (if not the nation), yet I regularly meet conservative Republicans who see in BushCo a serious threat to the nation and the world. The world is, in truth, a multihued wonder.

[underseasurveyor]

5. A similar letter from California came out during the brown/black outs

a few summers ago. That letter I believe was aimed mostly to other states that were bitching about their states "having" to send their dollars to those :whine: granola grazing vegetarians, those lazy liberals, them darn queers and worthless dope smokin drug addicts that can't keep their own lights on. :/whine:

California fired back with a similar response, 'OK:evilgrin: you don't want to help us when we need it AND especially when it's NOT OUR GODDAMN FAULT, Fine! Here's what you won't be getting from us anymore' :-) Then a seemingly endless list of things they produce and manufacture with the same sarcastic tone :thumbsup: I loved it:evilgrin:

It's amazing 'what' and 'how much' the state of California produces.
I'm glad I have a California birth certificate. Time to go back home.
To MY NATIVE NEW COUNTRY :-)

[KharmaTrain]

7. Now I Know Why I Am Beginning To Really Love California

We cancelled the Disneyworld trip in November, went to LA instead...none of our vacation money is going to ANY red state...even if there are blue counties within. So we had the real agonizing decision to go to California or Hawaii. Damn, looks like we'll be taking a pass on Branson, Missouri for a while.

The interesting thing is until 1992, California almost always went for Repugnicans. Now, except for the nutjobs in Orange County, the state has gotten more and more progressive...even the Repugnicans.

This regime has done a lot to destroy California. They manufactured that power scam in 2000 to mess up the economy for Gore & destroy the Grey Davis. They accomplished both, and still no one has ever had to pay for all the manipulation and fraud that went on...no one other than the taxpayers of California.

[Tesla]

9. I'm in Ohio

What color am I????

I wanna be blue, I'll settle for purple.

Our "Red Staters" are imported.

[KharmaTrain]

14. The Taft Family Was Imported?

Ohio also has two Repugnican Senators. Looks red to me. But I also know this is the state of great Democrats like Metzenbaum, Glenn & Stokes.

I'll settle for some purple there, too...especially south of Columbus. I sent donations to several groups sending people to Ohio last year and I'll do the same again in 2008...right now, I'm focused on winning elections in 2006...we've got a lot of work to do.

[Im with Rosey]

10. NutJobs in Orange County!

I live in Orange County! I am not a nutjob, I am a life-long, proud DEMOCRAT. I have never seen as many demoractic bumper stickers as I saw K/E bumper stickers. Many nutjobs worked very hard to convince as many voters as possible and are still not giving up the fight. I, for one, am offended by your comment. Perhaps you need to stop throwing insults around and some of those nutjobs will pay attention to the real issues!

[KharmaTrain]

13. Whoa! Did Someone Have A Bad Hair Day?

I have Democratic relatives who live in Orange County...Huntington Beach. They're the ones who use that term...and I heard it plenty when we were there in December. This is still the land of B-1 Bob Dornan, Dana Roerbacher and the Orange County Register.

I live in what was a heavily Repugnican area...and we still have lots of nutjobs around here. Anyone who could vote for Alan Keyes automatically fits that bill here, and we worked for over 20 years to oust a Repugnican Congressman and replaced him with a Progressive Democrat (one of the only gains the Democrats gained in 2004).

If nutjob is an insult, I'd hate to see what you consider terms the right wing throws around about us. Actually, I don't care. Just keep up the good work and here's hoping one day Orange County is a Democratic bastion.

[izzie]

11. I like it.

--

[WildClarySage]

12. My mom had a great idea. Those of us who live in 'red states'

who voted for Kerry should ALL move to Texas. Then, in 2008, we will have the electoral votes concentrated where they will do the most good, and win in a landslide.

Hey, it could happen. I call Galveston.