Blitzer really is such a twit.

[trof]

My periodic rant.

"Christiane, we have to cut away. Apparently there's an airplane attempting to make an emergency landing at Boston's Logan airport. We're told it's an American Trans Air flight with some kind of problem with the landing gear. Ah there we have the shot. We don't know exactly what the problem is but it's been circling the airport for some period of time. It looks like we can see the landing gear but it might be the engines or something. Sorry to cut away, but WE HAVE TO MAKE SURE THIS AIRPLANE GETS ON THE GROUND OK."
(yeah...right)
<camera pulls back and we see that the airplane is still miles from the airport>
Looks like the airplane isn't ready to land yet so ah back to Christiane Amanpour in Afghanistan. Christiane blah blah blah blah blah uh I see the airplane is about to land now. we'll have to cut away to Boston again. WE HAVE TO MAKE SURE THESE PEOPLE GET ON THE GROUND SAFELY "
***please god puhleeze let us show a ball of flame and twisted metal***
"Ah the airplane is about to touch down now. Uh I HOPE everything is OK"
(yeah...right)
"Ah the plane is touching down everything looks OK for now it looks like everything's OK thank God we had to see this and be sure that everyone is OK"
***shit shit shit no crash. complete waste of time. oh well, ya never know. gotta be ready.***
(Another disappointing moment in the life of a tabloid TV personality)

[roguevalley]

1. isn't this the truth?

reminds me of that newscaster song one of the eagles did.

[arcane1]

2. "Dirty Laundry" by Don Henley, still as relevant today, if not more

I make my living off the evening news
Just give me something, something I can use
People love it when you lose, they love dirty laundry

Well, I could've been an actor, but I wound up here
I just have to look good, I don't have to be clear
Come and whisper in my ear, give us dirty laundry

Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em all around

We got the bubbleheaded bleach-blonde, comes on at 5
She can tell you about the plane crash with a gleam in her eye
It's interesting when people die, give us dirty laundry

Can we film the operation? Is the head dead yet?
You know the boys in the newsroom got a running bet
Get the widow on the set, we need dirty laundry

You don't really need to find out what's going on
You don't really want to know just how far it's gone
Just leave well enough alone, keep your dirty laundry

Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up, kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're stiff, kick 'em all around

Dirty little secrets, dirty little lies
We got our dirty little fingers in everybody's pie
Love to cut you down to size, we love dirty laundry

We can do the innuendo, we can dance and sing
When it's said and done, we haven't told you a thing
We all know that crap is king, give us dirty laundry

[trof]

3. That's great

and dead on.
"If it bleeds it leads"
You could hear the anticipation in Vulfie's voice.

[trof]

4. and another thing...

What's with all the recent cutesy-poo back-and-forth witty (not) repartee?
I'm sure CNN has hired a bunch of ex-vaudeville slapstick "humor" writers.
The execrable puns alone cause me to regurgitate.
:puke:

[John_H]

5. BWAAAAAAA. Best laugh I've had in a while. Great Post.

kick.