Faces of Iraqi Freedom

[Sandpiper]

SECRETARY FLEISCHER: Good afternoon. The President began his day today with an intelligence briefing on recent TV news coverage of the non-quagmire in Iraq, followed by a temper tantrum and a panty-wadding snit. The President is dismayed by the non-FOX media's traitorous determination to practice fact-obsessed journalism at a time of political crisis, and is especially enraged by the Iraqi populace's spiteful refusal to play along with the line he sold to the American public: that those filthy ragheads couldn't wait for us to kill their families, incinerate their homes, and take over their oil fields.

Well, I stand before you today to remind you that regardless of what it sounds like those Iraqi children were shrieking as they fired machine guns at the soldiers of our vast coalition, they were really just scoffing at the liberal fiction of rampant anti-Americanism among Iraqazoid civilians. Indeed, just as black is white, this hateful myth is false. Yes, everywhere non-liberals look, throngs of beaming Iraqo-Ricans can be seen blissfully reveling in their newfound freedom, smiling beatifically as they happily extract jagged shards of JDAM shrapnel from deep within each others' faces – not unlike amorous gorillas plucking the blood-engorged fleas off the backs of their godless animal brethren. And lest anyone doubt this truth, I ask them to remember that the camera never lies, and behold the proof of our success to date:



This lucky recent convert to American FreedomTM is positively erupting with joy and excitement about her glorious future in the brave new world that is George W. Bush's Iraq. Flash those pearly whites, Miss Camel bin Lipstick! There's nowhere to go but up, up, UP!



This handsome fella couldn't be happier to be on the shell-shocked receiving end of a Big Fluffy Love Bomb of Democracy (BiFLBODTM). Why, moments after this photo was taken, he wrote out "THANK YOU PRESIDENT BUSH" in a steaming rope of his own intestines!



Sure, little Sadika here may look a mess - but looks can be deceiving. Truth be told, she was tired of smelling all those icky death smells, and is tickled raw to be enjoying the privelege of burrowing her giant Arab honker in a comfy, fragrant pillow of Freedom GauzeTM!



Mommy and daddy were only supposed to be at the market for a few minutes, but now thanks to President Bush, they're haggling over sheep's eyes in heaven for all eternity – and little Omar Jr. is so happy about it, he can't wait to grow up and thank America in person!



Blissfully relieved of the stresses which accompany the burden of functioning legs, barrel-chested Abdul here dreams sweet dreams of imminent visits from agendaless American missionaries – all while breathing deeply from a frosty tank of invigorating 100% Freedom AirTM!



Iraqazoid youth flock through Freedom RubbleTM-strewn streets, jubilantly shouting, "Hooray for America! We welcome their condescending reinvention of our inferior nation, and we are eager for the establishment of martial law over our helpless sand negro selves!"

The rest at:

http://www.whitehouse.org/iraq/faces.asp

[HFishbine]

1. I hate the fucks responsible for this

www.wirecom.com/happy.mpg

[lumpy]

2. And this is just a microscopic iota

of the havoc Bushco has wreaked on Iraqi lives.