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America, we need to have a talk. Step into my office:

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MadProphetMargin Donating Member (756 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:11 PM
Original message
America, we need to have a talk. Step into my office:
Come in, please sit down. Comfortable? Good, then we can begin.

I thought it was time we had a little talk. I suppose you're wondering why I've called you in today. Well, you see, I'm not entirely satisfied with your performance lately...I'm afraid your work's been slipping, and...and, well, I'm afraid we've been thinking about letting you go.

Oh, I know, I know. You've been with the company a long time now. Let me see...230 years! My word, doesn't time fly! It seems like only yesterday...I remember the day you commenced your employment, showing up in a home-made blue uniform, bootless, with your squirrel gun clutched in your grimy hands..."Where do I start?", you asked. I recall my exact words: "There's a column of the tyrant's troops", I said, smiling paternally, "get to it."

Well, we've certainly come a long way since then, haven't we? And yes, yes, in all that time, you haven't missed a day. Well done, thou good and faithful servant.

Also, please don't think I've forgotten about your outstanding service record, or about all of the invaluable contributions you've made to the company...Helping put an end to the loathesome employment practices of our Southern branch office, helping to stop that hostile takeover in the 1940s, that errand to the moon...A rather impressive list. Don't get me wrong.

But...well, to be frank, we've had our problems, too. There's no getting away from it. Do you know what I think a lot of it stems from? I'll tell you...it's your basic unwillingness to get on within the company. You don't seem to want to face up to any real responsibility...remember, your position DID call for a lot of self-direction...which I haven't been seeing a lot of, particularly recently. Lord knows, you've been given plenty of opportunities.

We've offered you promotion time and time again, and each time you've turned us down. "I couldn't handle the work, boss", you wheedled, "I know my place".

To be frank, you're not TRYING, are you? You see, you've been standing in one place too long, and it's starting to show in your work...and, I might add, in your general standard of behavior. The constant bickering on the factory floor has not escaped my attention...nor the recent bouts of rowdiness in the staff cafeteria. What are the customers to think? What are they to make of your bullying, your despair, your cowardice, and all your carefully nutured bigotries?

Really, it's not good enough, is it?

And it's no good blaming the drop in work standards on the management either...though, to be sure, the management is VERY bad. In fact, let's not mince words...the management is TERRIBLE. We've had a string of embezzlers, frauds, liars, and lunatics making a string of catastrophic decisions. This is plain fact.

But who ELECTED them?

It was YOU. YOU who appointed these people. YOU who gave them the power to make more and more of your decisions for you! While I'll admit that anyone can make a mistake once, to go on making the same lethal errors decade after decade seems to me to be nothing short of deliberate. You have encouraged these malicious incompetents, who have made your working life a shambles. You have accepted without question their senseless orders. You have allowed them to fill your workspace with machines and substances that are proven to be dangerous.

You could have stopped them.

All you had to do was say "no". You have no spine. You have no pride. You are no longer an asset to the company. I will, however, be generous. You will be granted one year to show me some improvement in your work. If at that time you are still unwilling to make a go of it...

...You're fired.

That will be all. You may return to your labors.

Paraphrased from Alan Moore
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:17 PM
Response to Original message
1. Awesome
I forwarded it on to some people. Pass it on, get out the vote!!

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MadProphetMargin Donating Member (756 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:21 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. As I noted at the bottom, it's not my work.
I changed the original a bit, to reflect current politics.
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MadProphetMargin Donating Member (756 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:32 PM
Response to Reply #1
5. In addition, he also wrote this:
They say there's a broken light for every heart on Broadway.
They say that life's a game, and then they take the board away,
They give you masks and costumes and an outline of the story,
then leave you all to improvise their vicious cabaret.

In no longer pretty cities,
There are fingers in the kitties,
There are warrants forms and chitties,
And a jackboot on the stair...

There's sex and death and human grime,
In monochrome for one thin dime,
And at least the trains run on time,
But they don't go anywhere.

Facing responsibilities either,
On their backs or on their knees,
There are ladies who simply freeze,
And dare not turn away...

And the widows who refuse to cry,
Will be dressed in garters and bow-tie,
And be taught to kick their legs up high.
In this vicious cabaret.

At last the 21st century show!
The ballet on the burning stage!
The documentary seen upon the fractured screen...
The dreadful poem scrawled upon the crumpled page!

There's a policeman with an honest soul,
That has seen whose head is on the pole,
And he grunts and fills his briar bowl,
With a feeling of unease.

Then he briskly frisks the torn remains,
For a fingerprint or crimson stains,
And endeavors to ignore the chains,
That he walks in to his knees.

While his master in the dark nearby,
Inspects the hands with brutal eye,
Has never brushed a woman's thigh,
But has squeezed a nation's throat.

And he hungers in his secret dreams,
For the harsh embrace of cruel machines,
But his lover is not what she seems,
And she will not leave a note.

At last the 21st century show!
The situation tragedy!
Grand opera slick with soap! Cliff hangers with no hope!
The water color in the flooded gallery.

There's a girl who'll push but not shove,
And she's desperate for her father's love,
She believes the hand beneath the glove,
May be the one she needs to hold.

Though she doubts her host's moralities,
She decides that she is more at ease,
In the land of doing-as-you-please,
Than outside in the cold.

But the backdrops peel away,
And the cast get eaten by the play,
There's a murderer at the matinee,
There are dead men in the aisles.

And the patrons and the actors are uncertain,
If the show is through,
And with sidelong looks await their cue,
But the frozen mask just smiles.

At last the 21st century show!
The torch-song no one ever sings!
The curfew chorus line! The comedy divine!
The bulging eyes of puppets, strangled by their strings!

There's thrills and chills and girls galore,
There's sing-songs and suprises!
There's something here for everyone,
Reserve your seat today!

There's mischief and Malarkies,
But no married queers or muslim darkies,
Within this bastard's carnival-
This vicious CABARET!

-Alan Moore/David Lloyd.

The guy is the next Stephen Vinvent Benet.
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gravedancer Donating Member (1 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:19 PM
Response to Original message
2. anticrazy government
Did not appoint or vote for these people in the 'guvernmint'.

http://www.alexusfreehost.com/southdakota/checks.html

Yet they are ruining peoples finacial lives.
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MadProphetMargin Donating Member (756 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:22 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. As a nation, we did. Nixon, Reagan, Bush I, Clinton (to some degree), and
Bush the Younger, etc, etc.

We, as a people, are responsible.
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newyawker99 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 03:21 PM
Response to Reply #2
9. Hi gravedancer!!
Welcome to DU!! :toast:
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mac56 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:34 PM
Response to Original message
6. V!!!!
I recognized it right away.
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MadProphetMargin Donating Member (756 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:35 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. Yep. However, Alan Moore is also a regular writer and musician, and
wrote both of those pieces long before he wrote V.
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mac56 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-25-04 02:37 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. Did not know that.
I'm more impressed with him all the time.
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