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Edited on Mon Feb-02-04 05:17 PM by calimary
There MUST Be a Pony…
The fiasco over the Whoppers of Mass Distraction – OOPS! – I mean weaponsofmassdestructionrelatedprogramactivities – OOPS! – I mean Weapons of Mass Destruction – reminds me of the old joke about the kid and the horse manure around the Christmas tree. Christmas morning comes and there are piles of horse hockey clustered all around the Christmas tree. The kid’s parents come into the living room and see their child frantically digging through the manure. When asked why, the kid replies “there’s so much horse poo here that I just know there’s a pony under there. There MUST be a pony!”
Now I know who that kid is. One of several, actually. George Bush and Dick Cheney come to mind immediately, followed closely by Condi Rice, Donald Rumsfeld, and all the rest of the GOP apologists who are JUST SURE there were all those nasty vats full of VX nerve agent and trucks loaded with chemical weapons and warehouses full of nukes, alongside bunkers filled with the rockets and missiles just rarin’ to go, plus a partridge in a pear tree, delivering all that nasty stuff right to Boston, Baltimore and Key Biscayne.
There MUST be a pony! I know all I see are road apples. But underneath it all, there just absolutely MUST be a pony! Trust me!
That’s the problem, guys. Some of us (well, myself proudly NOT included) DID trust you. Like a majority of the American people, for example. They believed you, took your word for it, gave you the benefit of the doubt. Especially since you were the guys who, after you broke in, assuring everybody that “the adults are back in charge” and nobody’s gonna be pulling a fast one anymore, because they’re “bringing honor and integrity back to the White House,” and certainly nobody’s gonna get caught leaving stains on a blue dress like that last guy did. Oh yeah, and he even lied about that, which we hate.
Turns out, about the only thing these weasels HAVEN’T lied about is leaving stains on some blue dress. In the last few years, they have concocted a virtual tapestry of lies, of every color, thread weight and stitch. They’re lying now, even as the truth starts to come out.
Now, it’s – oh, boo-hoo, those nasty ol’ CIA people gave us the WRONG INFORMATION, sob, sob, sniffle, sniffle. They done us wrong. They sold us a bill of goods, so of course we made the wrong decision! Cue the violins!
Sorry. I’m not buying. It’s rather intriguing to watch, and almost as much fun as the desperate scrambling to recover from a Janet Jackson flash job, as the White House and everybody who bows to it and spins for it is trying to finger the intelligence. At best, they’re half right. It was the intelligence, true. But what intelligence? Was it everything that was laid before them? Was it everything Hans Blix and Scott Ritter and the intelligence experts here in America, AND Britain, AND even Israel presented? Oh, you mean THAT intelligence.
Let’s be clear about one thing. THAT intelligence was what they got. THAT intelligence is what they turned their noses up at, because it told them repeatedly that there was “no there there.” THAT intel told them the inspections were working, that there was nothing there worth getting your knickers in a knot about, no less shrieking and stomping off to war about. They knew. That was undoubtedly why some CIA analysts have complained that Cheney and his buddy, Scooter Libby, were over at the CIA practically every day, breathing down their necks, leaning on them bigtime, pressing and pressuring them to come up with something to justify a war commitment they’d made LONG ago. That was undoubtedly why the Office of Special Plans was put together – the shadowy group in the bowels of the administration, accountable to no one, hidden in their very own spider hole. This was the group charged with nothing less than sifting through all the intel to find something to support the decision Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Rice, Wolfowitz, Perle, and the other dear ones had already made.
David Kay certainly says so, but then again, he’s a company man. People around him were already jumping the gun last summer, claiming that he and his Iraq Survey Group had found a whole bag of tricks that was going to vindicate everybody and everything. It was going to be really good news, launching a thousand “I told you so’s.” As it turns out, this was just another lie, just another fraud perpetrated on the American people. It’s actually a rather murderous fraud, when you consider that there are now more than 500 fewer American people to fool, thanks to the rising death toll among our soldiers.
Sorry, but those “I told you so’s” belong to us war-opponents who were saying this last summer. Heck, we were saying it even earlier, back in the fall of 2002, when the first sizeable protests were starting to occur. We knew there was no pony under all that horse manure. Just a lot of meadow muffins. Just another lie. Just another fairy tale, like Young George so enjoys reading to photogenic little school children when he needs another distraction to feed the public, or when there’s a national crisis blowing up around him. That’s probably about the only time he actually does read anything, at all.
Now that the Democrats have begun to show a little spine, I wonder how they plan to use it. I wonder how loudly they’re going to call the administration on this latest batch of baloney. Is the pile-on going to be off-track, and off-subject, and just kill the messenger of the bad news? Or are they finally going to figure out where the buck is supposed to stop? Scott Ritter, the other day, on CNN, declared that it’s about time we face who’s really accountable here. The buck stops, as Harry Truman once said, at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. And I’m not talking the Vice President’s office, either.
Yeah, Bush has finally been pressured into going along with an independent investigation. Whoopee. It remains to be seen how effective such a probe actually is. Or maybe it’ll be more like the whitewash that Britain’s Hutton Report turned out to be. Last I heard, Cheney was already calling various lawmakers, probably either leaning on them (as he leaned on the CIA) to go easy, or not to look in here or under there, don’t ask too many questions, and by all means, pay not attention to that man over there behind the curtain. He has been calling them, you know, hoping to put the fix in.
I suspect we’ll have seen a lot more of Janet Jackson than we’ll ever see from these snarky, sneaky snake-oil salesmen in the White House. They’d undoubtedly like us to be preoccupied with other things. Judging from the reaction to halftime at this year’s Superbowl, I’d almost be willing to bet they put Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake up to it. All that was missing was the Christmas tree and the horse manure.
gonna be pulling a fast one anymore, because they’re “bringing honor and integrity back to the White House.” Certainly nobody’s gonna get caught leaving stains on a blue dress like that last guy did. Oh yeah, and he even lied about that, which we hate.
Turns out, about the only thing these weasels HAVEN’T lied about is leaving stains on some blue dress. In the last few years, they have concocted a virtual tapestry of lies, of every color, thread weight and stitch. They’re lying now, even as the truth starts to come out.
Now, it’s – oh, boo-hoo, those nasty ol’ CIA people gave us the WRONG INFORMATION, sob, sob, sniffle, sniffle. They done us wrong. They sold us a bill of goods, so of course we made the wrong decision! Cue the violins!
Sorry. I’m not buying. It’s rather intriguing to watch, and almost as much fun as the desperate scrambling to recover from a Janet Jackson flash job, as the White House and everybody who bows to it and spins for it is trying to finger the intelligence. At best, they’re half right. It was the intelligence, true. But what intelligence? Was it everything that was laid before them? Was it everything Hans Blix and the intelligence experts here in America, AND Britain, AND even Israel presented? Oh, you mean THAT intelligence.
Let’s be clear about one thing. THAT intelligence was what they got. THAT intelligence is what they turned their noses up at, because it told them repeatedly that there was “no there there.” THAT intel told them the inspections were working, that there was nothing there worth getting your knickers in a knot about, no less shrieking and stomping off to war about. They knew. That was undoubtedly why some CIA analysts have complained that Cheney and his buddy, Scooter Libby, were over at the CIA practically every day, breathing down their necks, leaning on them bigtime, pressing and pressuring them to come up with something to justify a war commitment they’d made LONG ago. That was undoubtedly why the Office of Special Plans was put together – the shadowy group in the bowels of the administration, accountable to no one, hidden in their very own spider hole. This was the group charged with nothing less than sifting through all the intel to find something to support the decision Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Rice, Wolfowitz, Perle, and the other dear ones had already made.
David Kay certainly says so, but then again, he’s a company man. People around him were already jumping the gun last summer, claiming that he and his Iraq Survey Group had found a whole bag of tricks that was going to vindicate everybody and everything. It was going to be really good news, launching a thousand “I told you so’s.” As it turns out, this was just another lie, just another fraud perpetrated on the American people. It’s actually a rather murderous fraud, when you consider that there are now more than 500 fewer American people to fool, thanks to the rising death toll among our soldiers.
Sorry, but those “I told you so’s” belong to us war-opponents who were saying this last summer. Heck, we were saying it even earlier, back in the fall of 2002, when the first sizeable protests were starting to occur. We knew there was no pony under all that horse manure. Just a lot of meadow muffins. Just another lie. Just another fairy tale, like Young George so enjoys reading to photogenic little school children when he needs another distraction to feed the public, or when there’s a national crisis blowing up around him. That’s probably about the only time he actually does read anything, at all.
Now that the Democrats have begun to show a little spine, I wonder how they plan to use it. I wonder how loudly they’re going to call the administration on this latest batch of baloney. Is the pile-on going to be off-track, and off-subject, and just kill the messenger of the bad news? Or are they finally going to figure out where the buck is supposed to stop? Former UN weapons inspector Scott Ritter, the other day, on CNN, declared that it’s about time we face who’s really accountable here. The buck stops, as Harry Truman once said, at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. And I’m not talking the Vice President’s office, either.
Yeah, Bush has finally been pressured into going along with an independent investigation. Whoopee. It remains to be seen how effective such a probe actually is. Or maybe it’ll be more like the whitewash that Britain’s Hutton Report turned out to be. Last I heard, Cheney was already calling various lawmakers, probably either leaning on them (as he leaned on the CIA) to go easy, or not to look in here or under there, don’t ask too many questions, and by all means, pay no attention to that man over there behind the curtain. He has been calling them, you know, hoping to put the fix in.
I suspect we’ll have seen a lot more of Janet Jackson than we’ll ever see from these snarky, sneaky snake-oil salesmen in the White House. They’d undoubtedly like us to be preoccupied with other things. Judging from the reaction to halftime at this year’s Superbowl, I’d almost be willing to bet they put Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake up to it. All that was missing was the Christmas tree and the horse manure.
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