Molly Ivins: We run this country (You're the boss...now act like it)

[Dudley_DUright]

Look at it this way. Voting whitens your teeth, sweetens your breath and perks up your sex life. Voting is new and improved, stops the heartbreak of psoriasis and improves your gas mileage. Voting makes you feel virtuous, is your patriotic duty and entitles you, absolutely free, to four years of guilt-proof gritching about what's wrong with the country. Those who do not vote forfeit the right to complain.

Voting causes fat to disappear. Poof! Up to 10 pounds gone in just one trip to the polling place. Standing in the voting box improves your IQ, restores short-term memory and enables you to think of witty responses at the very moment you need them. Besides, if you don't vote, it will all be your fault.

Voting is a friendly thing to do. You get to meet your neighbors and catch up on their children. Also, romances have been known to start while standing in line to vote.

Voting prevents underarm stains, ring-around-the-collar, carpet odor and dust bunnies. Exercising your franchise will firm and tone both your abs and your glutes, as well as lowering cholesterol and blood pressure. Casting your ballot makes that unsightly flab on your upper arms disappear, while toning the biceps. Using your suffrage takes weight off your thighs and makes you a more pleasant person all-around. There are countless recorded cases of people whose personalities improved dramatically after voting.

more...

http://www.workingforchange.com/article.cfm?itemid=18015

[fugue]

1. I love it, Molly, but . . .

. . . I could've used it before the deadline for New York voter registration.

Note to all pundits: please come out with your "why you should vote" articles before the registration deadlines rather than before the election. It's weeks too late to convince the people I was trying to convince.

[Kurovski]

2. Molly is just about the best,

and I hope she composes a column about the other side of the coin.

The owners of the company in which we're the boss have a fondness for supressing and stealing the vote. and certainly that's worth some column space.

Something along the lines of how the top dogs in America,inc. get their teeth whitened, while the rest of us mid-level managers get ours knocked out.