Soldiers' Story (SFChron)

[UpInArms]

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2004/02/01/MNGOC4MLJC1.DTL

excerpt:

Some have already seen the changes in themselves when they went home on leave. Some woke up dreaming of combat or pulled their car over to check a box by the side of the road for explosives. Others felt naked as they walked unarmed through crowds of strangers in the airport or the mall.

They've heard about "shell shock'' and post- traumatic stress, and they talk about a handful of men of the 3rd Infantry Division, who went home after the war and killed their wives or themselves. Suicide rates during this conflict have already been abnormally high, according to the Army. Knowing that, some soldiers worry what will happen to their buddies when they get home.

"This battalion will have more deaths in the first 30 days after we get back than we did in the whole deployment," speculated Spc. Darryl Saylor, 25, of Baltimore.

...more...

[Mari333]

1. Reading this was sad

I guess many of the soldiers in charge of their troops feel there is a need to justify why the hell they are there, because its just too painful for them to wrap their mind around the fact that we are only there to divvy up the oil fields and gain lucrative contracts for big corporations. That must be too much to bear for them to acknowledge.
Denial all around by them, and the US public, as to why even ONE 19 year old is blown to bits for nothing but wealthy corporate bastards who use them like pawns to gain control of the second largest supply of oil on earth and pass the contracts out to their buddies.
So much like Vietnam, which was the same horseshit..people in denial til the very end that we were there for any reason except the truth..Wars are big business, and make a lot of money for a lot of people.
Follow the money.

[saigon68]

2. WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF BIG TIME PTSD

The public hasn't started to turn against the troops yet.

We are on our way to

IRAQ-NAM Redux 2004-

[Mari333]

3. sounds, again, like people treated you like shit after Nam

because they dont understand PTSD..I do.
I still have it, not as a vet, but as someone who went through watching her husband blown to bits in an explosion at his job.
I dont have what you went through..not as severe....good lord I was never in a war. But I know about panic attacks, I know about walking around in a trance not knowing what to think, thinking I was going insane, feeling completely disconnected from everything, hiding from the world, jumping every time I heard a noise, and sinking into a black hole of depression so deep from the trauma I had to crawl out.
I cant even begin to imagine myself seeing so many killed or wounded day after day as you did.
The public? people. They expect you to honour their own stupid preconceived notions of what they want you to be, and they did that to me too after my husband was killed. They expect this from anyone who suffers from PTSD because people in trauma scare them. If you havent been thru a war then you have NO idea what its like. just as I now tell people who JUDGED me at the time..until you have walked in my shoes, shove your judgement of me up your ass.
I think people avoid pain. someone in pain reminds them of PAIN they themselves refuse to acknowledge in their own lives.
Fuck em.
In the meantime, yes, Im terrified for my stepson Mike, who is going over there and god only knows what kind of shape he will come back.
He is so clueless. I will do everything I can to help him find someone who can counsel him with the PTSD if he asks. Its total trauma, and should NOT have happened to you, and now you share it with the rest of the world to help others understand how horrible it is ...
My dad called it shell shock..he had it after he flew missions over Italy..said it took him 2 years after WW2 to come out of the trance of trauma he was in.
anyway. (((hugs))) from some old mom out here.

[priller]

4. Shrub always talks about never forgetting 9/11

He constantly says, "We will not forget the lessons of 9/11", and I'm not sure how much that applies to Iraq. But he and his admin *have* forgotten the lessons of Vietnam, which are much more salient in the current conflict. Making the same old dumb mistakes all over again. And after the untold billions will be spent, the country will have the further cost of 10's of thousands of battle-scarred veterans. Vietnam all over again.

[loudnclear]

5. The lesson of 9/11 was that Osama wanted us out of Saudi Arabia and

a homeland for the Palestinians. So far, he has gotten 50% of what he wanted and we have gotten Saddam and a tragic mess on our hands in Iraq, including over US military killed and thousands of innocent Iraqis. What do you imagine that lesson is?

[Rollins]

6. it is a whole new syndrome

There was some psychological effects to fighting the first gulf war that the VA tried to deal with as best it could with fair results as evidenced by a good buddy who still gors to the local VA often because he is still living the Vietnam war. These new war victims though, many families are going to be scarred for life because of the 'out of ordinary rhelm' experience that the troops go thru every day. As far as Mari333, I too have gone thru an extra ordinary experience and have always enjoyed reading her posts over the months, she uses the energy brought up by trama so well.

[Mari333]

7. Thank you its just proactive anger

I remember a woman who was crying at a job once..I asked her, whats the matter..she said her 14 month old child had died a couple months earlier from an illness..and I grabbed her and said OMG woman..you have every right to BE A MESS and asked her if she was getting counseling for the horror and grief..she said yes, but her family WAS ANGRY AT HER FOR CRYING AND TOLD HER TO GET OVER IT...
my god! thats how people behave after trauma and they are terrified of grief and pain.
soldiers, I would imagine, have a terrible time..the public has this STOOOPID pre concieved notion of men who stand around beating their chests and marching ...and they expect a soldier who IS REALLY JUST A HUMAN BEING FOR GODS SAKE to behave themselves and NOT BE IN HORRIFIC TRAUMA AND PAIN... sorry for the caps, I just get mad
I have 3 sons and a stepson..I taught all my sons to SHOW THEIR FEELINGS and get HELP for the pain they might be in..believe me, they all have panic attacks and freak out..hell, they lost their dad when they were kids, and I KNEW they would still freak out about it when they got older..I also went to grief counseling thank GOD and learned how to get through , minute by minute, day by day..
But whats out there for these SOLDIERS/KIDS and they are KIDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS who come home from this shit??? NOTHING.
They carry this crap in their heads and their families dont get it..and , unlike women, men have it worse imo in some ways because they are taught to HIDE their feelings of pain in this stooooooooooopid society.
It breaks my f*cking heart and makes me hopping mad at this world, on a daily basis.
I have to watch myself everyday also. I still freak out when something goes BANG in my life, and start stressing and imagining the worst. My youngest son does too, and I hope he gets some counseling for what happened to his daddy when he was 6.
Think about the trauma the KIDS of the soldiers are also going through..my god, its endless.
We have a whole generation of Hell to pay for this goddamn war for Nothing.
end of rant sorry Im just mad.

[Rollins]

8. thanks

You just wrote how a person might cope with PTSD. Us humans need more success stories to help us construct our realities. Awareness Accept and Action. We need to feel first and accept the fact many of these kids coming back from Iraq have been thru hell and can't talk about it. Our culture must learn how to help people feel and heal if we are to survive.

[Skittles]

10. PTSS is not a new syndrome

many people who suffered severe physical, sexual and emotional abuse as children suffer from PTSS their entire lives. What is telling about these war induced PTSS is that the entire well being of the formative years of these soldiers can be wiped out by stress in the battlefield.

[Whoa_Nelly]

9. This is rather telling and upsetting...

From the article:
They see the children as barometers: If children wave at a soldier while their parents are watching, they figure the parents probably like the Americans, too, even if they don't show it. If a child scowls or throws a rock, it suggests the parents are less fond of the Americans -- and their house might be due for a quick search.

While there is definitely an appeal to what our troops are experiencing, there is also a subtheme to this article regarding what the Iraqi citizens are experiencing.

[Mari333]

11. and how many of those children will grow up to hate us

and become suicide bombers ? as we all knew...the *bUshregime has created MORE terrorism, not less.

[Solly Mack]

12. My husband, while on leave, fell asleep on the floor in front of the TV

So I stood over him and gently nudged him so he could go up to bed..he rolled over with a sudden jerk and sat up in one swift movement. The look on his face brought tears ...he was bleached white with eyes so incredibly wide..he bore the look of someone confused and terrified all at the same time. I stood very still and let him find his bearings. ..my heart breaking.


Another friend home at the same time fell asleep in the car on the way home from an outting-next to his house is a softball complex and we were just driving past when he mumbles he needs to use the bathroom.

So his wife starts to pull over when he screams.."SSTOP. Don't pull over..you have to check for bombs first."
He then comes more awake, sits very still and ask "where am I? Home or Iraq?" She tells him he's at home..very quietly and while holding back tears.

He nods and and darts out to relieve himself by a tree.

He nods out immediately once back in the car and 5 minutes later we were parked in front of the soldiers house. He's still asleep so she softly lets him know he can get out now.

Before he would let anyone out of the car, in his sleepy confusion, he demands a perimeter check by the driver. So his wife gets out of the car, walks all around it, and let's him know it's safe.

This is just a samll taste of what can be expected...and this isn't as bad as those who will go off and kill themselves or others...but it didn't have to be for me..because these two incidents ripped my heart out.

[Mari333]

14. oh god.

.

[Skittles]

19. I think about you and your husband whenever I think of the soldiers

to whom I send care pacakages. It rips my heart out too.

[peacetalksforall]

13. We never learn. We can learn.

To send a young person off to kill and call it defending the nation, the valley, the farm...do we know the extent of brainwashing that has to go on to get the strongest of ours to do this?

Now we have a war that is going to go down as the most transparently corporate and closely focused killing event of all times, no matter what the final count of lives, limbs, and minds.

The only saving grace here is that these killing directors have crossed the line - the ones who are ordering, commanding it, planning it, organizing it ARE ALL IN SUITS. Combine money to be made from war with control of people and loss of rights, plus the protection and expansion of Israel.

If the littlest of people cannot live in peace to make a living and raise up their bodies and minds, then we must blame the people who put their thumb on us.

In years past when the world seemed to be expanding into something that seemed progressivley peaceful - the number one industry in the world was tourism. Do you know how many people and countries can prosper in that industry? Do you know how many little people can start to make it when tourism, not killing dominates?

Take a look at what our leaders have given us.

As someone posted - Osama Bin Laden named his demands - two of them were our exit from Saudi Arabia and freedom and a home for the Palstinians. Yes, yes...surprise...our leaders gave him one of those.

Peace is possible. None of our leaders seem to major in it, however.

[reprobate]

15. Anyone want to place a bet on the outcome of iraq?

I'm betting on a combining of the various tribes and religous groups in iraq to drive the invaders out. This is already being talked about among the iraqis according to some posts recently.

It it happens before the election * will be driven out of DC on a rail with lots of sticky stuff and tickly things clinging to him. I'm betting on this summer, when things are the most uncomfortable for our troops, but the iraqiis are used to it.

It's really important at that point that our candidate concentrate on pushing for treatment of our troops for the trauma they have gone thru. Important not just for election purposes, but for the health of our soldiers and for the health of the country.

[Pathwalker]

16. More 'Nam vets came home and committed suicide

than were killed in the war itself. That milestone was reached in 1987. My brother was one of them. This war is starting to look so much like Vietnam, the sequel. Both wars brought to you by chicken hawks AND LED BY THE POLITICOS - NOT the military. This adds meaning to that saying; those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it. I feel like I'm living a deja-Vietnam all over again. My son's best friend is stationed in Baghdad, right now. The horrors these young men will relive, and relive will scar them and their families for life. When will we learn?

[Mari333]

17. the chickenhawks that run this wont learn

my brother in law who blew his brains out in 87 after having one nightmare after another and didnt have anyone help him through the Vietnam nightmare, the men I have met who are shadows of themselves now because of it..
indeed, when will we learn not to throw away our children.
I told my husband today..Im so worried about my stepson..not just worried he will die or be wounded..
but worried about how he will come back..in what mental shape.
My god. why are people in so much denial.

[proud patriot]

18. I was wrong they got only two half-liter bottles of water a day

(snip)
The hot months -- June, July and August -- were bad ones for the 1-22. As attacks on the streets of Tikrit increased, so did the temperature. At times, soldiers were on rations of only two half-liter bottles of water a day as the thermometer soared into the 120s.

(snip)

Terwilliger and arcane1 remember me yelling "2 liters of water
a day" at protests this last summer and fall ...

Grrrrrrrrrrrr .... I was wrong they got less ..:grr: