Cheney to be in charge during Bush colonoscopy

[Pawel K]

Source: CNN

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Vice President Dick Cheney will serve as acting president briefly Saturday while President Bush is anesthetized for a routine colonoscopy, White House spokesman Tony Snow said Friday.

Bush is scheduled to have the medical procedure, expected to take about 2 1/2 hours, at the presidential retreat at Camp David, Maryland, Snow said.

Bush's last colonoscopy was in June 2002, and no abnormalities were found, Snow said.

The president's doctor had recommended a repeat procedure in about five years.

The procedure will be supervised by Dr. Richard Tubb and conducted by a multidisciplinary team from the National Naval Medical Center in Bethesda, Maryland, Snow said.



Read more: http://www.cnn.com/2007/POLITICS/07/20/bush.colonoscopy/

---

Ahhh, shit. We're fucked.

[mnhtnbb]

1. Do I get to be first to say they'll find Bush is FOS?

[Sheltiemama]

67. Actually ...

... after the preparation he has to go through in advance of the procedure, he WON'T be full of it. At least for a little while.

[LeftishBrit]

2. I managed to read that as...

'Cheney to be in charge OF Bush's colonoscopy'.

You don't really want to know the resultant bogglings of my imagination!

[demnan]

3. You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach?

That's why I have an "Impeach Cheney First" bumpersticker on my car.

[IndianaGreen]

92. What can a President Cheney do in 5 hours?

Nuke Iran. Bomb Hizbollah in Lebanon. Bomb Hamas in Gaza. Set the Capitol on fire. Arrest all the Democrats in Congress. Announce that Bush had complications during his colonoscopy and that he is brain dead. Shutdown the internet. Press censorship. Mass arrests of antiwar activists.

[obnoxiousdrunk]

4. President Bush temporarily will transfer power to Vice President Dick

Source: CNN

President Bush temporarily will transfer power to Vice President Dick Cheney while Bush has a colonoscopy Saturday.

No link yet.

---

No dertails yet

[Gman]

5. Oh, shit.

I don't care for how long, this could be dangerous.

[opihimoimoi]

9. Dangerous times comes from dangerous minds....these Bullies are deranged

[PittPoliSci]

38. you act like cheney doesn't pull the strings already

if something god forbid did happen, and cheney became president, i assure you 100% the american public would support impeaching him way more easily than bush.

[Gman]

52. That may be true

but Cheney is not at all above ordering the black bag terrorist attack, declaring the country under seige, dissolving Congress by decree, attacking Iran and then daring anyone to even think about stopping him.

[PittPoliSci]

65. i don't think that would happen.

i know he's not above that, but nobody would stand for it.

[Qutzupalotl]

94. Probably right.

I think we need to look at powers unique to the office of president to guess at why Cheney wants to borrow them.

Routine physical exam, my ass.

[SpiralHawk]

6. "Don't forget to put on clean diapers." - Sen. David Vitter (R-Pervert)

"We republicons already have a really crappy reputation, so, my beloved Commander AWOL, I cannot recommend too strongly that you wear clean diapers."

- Sen David Diaper Vitter (R- Pervert)

[madinmaryland]

8. Too late. It already happened.

yech!

[madinmaryland]

7. I just saw that

OMFG! WE'RE SCREWN!!1!!

:scared:

[DrDan]

10. why don't they just ask congressional repubs

they have their head up there most of the time anyway

[yardwork]

11. This is standard policy.

However, I am always suspicious of anything this crew does. I wonder what Dick will do during the hour or two he has the power of the presidency? More signing statements?

[Posteritatis]

22. Hasn't this happened a few times already?

Or am I thinking someone else within the administration passing things to their #2 for awhile? I forget.

[slj0101]

25. I'm going to guess that it happened with Reagan,

he was in and out of the hospital quite a bit during his terms.

[Posteritatis]

27. I was thinking specifically with Bush, though (nt)

[Junkdrawer]

35. 2002....

http://archives.cnn.com/2002/ALLPOLITICS/06/28/bush.tests/index.html

[SteelPenguin]

46. Yeah it's standard, but...

It's fun to say "Cue the Imperial March!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L8ZTTsiJupo

[SydneyBristow]

91. nice

good one :evilgrin:

:toast:

[theguvnorgc]

12. WAIT!

Isn't Cheney already UP THERE???

[Debi]

13. So Saturday is the day the US declares war on Iran? n/t

[C_U_L8R]

14. "temporarily"

just try and take it back chimpy... this is pretty funny

[onehandle]

15. Link: Cheney to become president…briefly

WASHINGTON (CNN) – President Bush will undergo a routine colonoscopy Saturday, and will transfer power to Vice President Dick Cheney during the procedure, expected to take about two and a half hours, the chief White House spokesman said.

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2007/07/20/cheney-to-become-presidentbriefly/

[Vilis Veritas]

16. Nothing to see here...move along...move along...

Come on now, what could possibly happen in two hours? It's not like anything could happen in two hours...

[musette_sf]

21. not even two hours... try 102 minutes

http://www.nytimes.com/packages/khtml/2002/05/25/nyregion/20020525_wtc_INSIDE_FEATURE.html

[Vilis Veritas]

26. my point exactly....

Peace

[ProudDad]

79. Just enough time to order the bombing of Iran (n/t)

[MrMickeysMom]

17. Having had one of these with state of the art anesthesia, I can tell you

The entire procedure, including the extraction of his head, ( *pop* :+ ) should take no more than 20 minutes, tops.

Then, how lucky for the chimp, as he'll once again be aware of his surrounding, enjoying a legitimate buzz, ready to add more executive orders to the batch congress keeps ignoring...

[Karmageddon]

18. Colonoscopy? Are they looking for his brain?

[maseman]

19. Bush has Rectitus

Rectitus is that desease where the nerve cord from your eyeball to your asshole short circuits and you end up having a shitty outlook on life.

Well, I always did say Shrub was full of shit. Maybe he'll be a little less ful of it now. :)

[username321]

51. ShrubMan

"Well, I always did say Shrub was full of shit. Maybe he'll be a little less ful of it now. :)"


He's becoming less full of shit now.........the prep is worse than the procedure!!!
Been there done that tooooo many times.

[SteelPenguin]

47. Well he does have shit for brains....

....where else would you look for it?

[sandyj999]

63. Actually it's for repair work

Because KO reamed him a new one last night.

[meow2u3]

97. I was thinking the same thing

He needed another Bush brain scan so the docs can check to see if his brain came dislodged :evilgrin:

[asjr]

20. I believe paranoia has gotten the better

of me. This is Dick's chance to actually have the title of president. GW will have to retire now for health reasons and Dick steps in. Dick will inherit signing statements and blow off the House and Senate for asking legitimate questions. Could this have been planned? Something ominous is in the air and I do not like it.

[dmr]

34. Right- and why at Camp David? Why not a hospital?

You can control the secrets much better this way, I suppose.

For a country that has the worse health care availability for a nation of our stature, it seems to me, he's spending our tax-dollars on a colonoscopy that should be done in a hospital setting that is set up for this procedure. Going under is not routine, this is always a risk - which means, they have to set up Camp David a specific way to handle any emergency that may arise. That is costly. That kind of money could treat several Americans.

Since I have absolutely no faith in any of them, and since they don't behave in good faith, or even try to live up to the intent of their responsibilities, I only have one option, and that is to suspect each and every move they make.

Normally I wish people well when they face something like this. I wish him nothing.

[Ilsa]

62. Exactly. Possible drug reactions especially if they use something

on him that he hasn't had before. Maybe a vagal reaction and loss of blood pressure. I suppose a puncture and bleeding is possible but extremely unlikely. Unless his doc just got back from Iraq and has PTSD and he decides to be a little too pushy with the scope. What else?

[progressoid]

23. Huh? You mean all this time Bush was in charge?

[Release The Hounds]

33. My thought too

Just making it official now

[Squatch]

24. Lord Vader.....RRRRiiiiiiisssssse

[Marie26]

28. Oh man

At first I thought this was a joke. This isn't good.

[Seabiscuit]

29. So the docs will be mining the depths of his soul... n/t

[bamacrat]

30. Really? How long does that take?

Does power really need to be transferred for a two hour procedure? Unless B*sh has a polyp or something serious, but even then the gov't might work better if they would take a day off.

[Junkdrawer]

32. He read "My Pet Goat" on 9/11 longer than he'll be out...n/t

[AngryOldDem]

39. If he's under anesthesia, he has to transfer power

Not that we can tell the difference most days anyway, he will be unconcsious during most of those two hours.

[Xipe Totec]

31. He doesn't need a colonoscopy

From this far away I can see he's still a perfect asshole.

[sarcasmo]

36. Iran attack while Bush has his Colonoscopy?

[kskiska]

37. Isn't Dick scheduled to have his heart batteries replaced?

Suppose his batteries expired during those 102 minutes. President Pelosi?

[insanad]

69. The Heart Device is just a Ruse

There is no heart device in Dick Cheney. They just stuck a tiny transmitter in there that sends out a fake heartbeat. The space where a heart usually goes in human beings is where he keeps his Sneer and Growl squirtpacks that he squeezes off whenever interviewed.

[SydneyBristow]

90. ooh god

dont tease me!!
please! its like a waving a big juicy bone in front of a dog...lol

[nc_gadfly]

40. actually. . .

...that would be an opportune time to impeach the president. That's when they should move.

[Qutzupalotl]

95. Why?

You want us to impeach tomorrow. Why not Monday?

[djg21]

41. Is it mouth or brain cancer that is suspected?

I've never wished terminal cancer on someone before. I am ashamed of myself. If he does have cancer, I hope he goes quickly and without pain. On second thought, I just hope he goes quickly.

[rodeodance]

42. ha Transfer power??---dicky boy already has it!

[shaniqua6392]

43. What a blessing that he has medical insurance

and can have a colonoscopy. Unlike 47 million American men, women and children. I hope they use an extra extra large scope on that big a-hole.

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

76. Yep.

[Larry Ogg]

44. I know it’s hard to find a proctologist that will stand behind his work…

But it would be nice if he could pull little Gorges head out of his ass…

[ozymandius]

45. not really news: Bush transferred power on January 20, 2001

:eyes:

[War Pigs]

48. kiss your asses goodby Iran, Syria, North Korea

Dr. Evil's about to go nuclear on your asses!!!

[superconnected]

49. Wow, good luck coming out of it George...

Imagine giving darth Cheney the power and then expecting it back.

[superconnected]

50. btw why would someone need a colonscopy?

The term actually is new to me.

[shanti]

54. it's a recommended

procedure after you turn 50 and every so many (don't know exactly) thereafter.

[onenote]

61. After 50 -- recommended every five years I believe

Chimpy had one in 2002. Same thing -- temp turnover of reins to Cheney:

http://archives.cnn.com/2002/ALLPOLITICS/06/28/bush.tests/

[pdefalla]

55. What is a colonoscopy

Colonoscopy is a procedure by which they insert a fiber optic cable with a camera on the end of it up your rectum and into your colon, and look for problems. Among the problems they might find are polyps, lesions, and weapons of mass destruction.
You don't think that Dick would, say, influence one of the doctors to make a "mistake"........do you?

[THUNDER HANDS]

58. I've had two

neither of which lasted 2 and a half hours, though. I was under for maybe 45 minutes at the most. Maybe they're factoring in recovery time too.

[Speaker]

53. Does this mean...

that Dick gets to stay president if Duhhhbya suffers permanent brain damage from the colonoscopy?

[ProudDad]

80. How will they be able to tell? (n/t)

[CreekDog]

82. Brain surgery?

Wow.

[anitar1]

56. supposed to 2 and 1/2 hrs ? Mine took about 30 to 40 minutes.

What an exaggeration. And I had a colostomy at one time.Poor wittle guy.

[muryan]

59. true but most colonoscopies are performed

by a doctor who has a strict schedule to be kept. Having more than just one patient the doctor wont spend as much time on the actual percedure as say the presidents doctor who will be nothing short of anal (pun intended) during the check up

[onenote]

60. including the time to clear the sedation -- that sounds about right

[paparush]

57. So, what if Cheney and the PNAC true believers decide not to relinquish?

Nah..they like operating from the shadows with the ready, willing, and able Strawman Bush**.

[yurbud]

64. subject line sounds like Cheney will be guiding the scope: 'Go deeper. he swallowed a toy car.'

[gasperc]

66. oops, thought it said Bush to give America colonoscopy

my bad

[Aristus]

68. How are they going to get the colonoscope up there when there are already

so many Bush supporters up his ass?

[saigon68]

70. They are looking for the Chimppanzee's Brain

Rumour has it it's located 5 inches up his Rectum

[yurbud]

71. I know why Bush is getting colonoscopy: Jeff Gannon noticed something broke off his weiner piercing

and he can't find it anywhere else.

[Emillereid]

72. What's new?

[rcdean]

73. They can do a colonscopy and a brain scan in the same procedure!

Then they can do Uncle Dick. Just one a**hole after another.

[emad]

74. Bush will undergo favorite medical procedure

Washington DC - (Ass Mess): "Last time round we found a number of articles," a White House medical source said today, "including a vibrating-tone cell phone set permanently at 'ON', a pair of handcuffs inscribed with Jeff Gannon's initials, a rubber hairbrush, five gold eagles and a minature address book stuffed with North Korean telephone numbers."

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s2i22152

[damntexdem]

75. Seems reasonable: they'll likely sight him during the colonoscopy.

;-)

[muriel_volestrangler]

77. Timeline: June 2002: Bush has colonoscopy. No abnormalities.

July 2002: Downing Street Memo about fixing the intelligence and facts around the policy.

June 2007: Blair steps down as PM.

July 2007: Bush needs another colonoscopy.

Coincidence? I think not. He just hasn't got Blair keeping an eye on things now ...

[ryanmuegge]

78. And this is different from the past 6 years how?

[kurth]

81. Cheney to attack Iran during Bush colonoscopy

[onenote]

98. DU poster wins fiction award

and then treated for tinfoil poisoning

[CreekDog]

83. Brain surgery?

Wow.

[truthisfreedom]

84. I must say, the whole thing sounds rather crappy.

Buh-dum-chahh.

[ckramer]

85. You know what they found in the colonoscopy ?

HIS HEAD!!!!!


-- Jay Leno 7/20/ night show

[GoddessOfGuinness]

86. Oh goody. The grownup.

Must be time to invade Iran.

What better time than when Dumbyass is having a brain scan?

[Counciltucky]

87. Maybe they'll find his head up there. n/t

[dEMOK]

88. The Irony (stay with me here) Lies in the Fact that...

...this official transfer of power of power will take place because Bush will be rendered "unconscious." ...just like the the 6 year unofficial transfer! :rofl:

[piedmont]

89. Only the third time in U.S. history this has happened. nt

[onenote]

99. given that the 25th amendment is only 30 years old, that's hardly surprising

[Qutzupalotl]

93. Can an "acting president" sign executive orders?

Do they have force of law if they are not fully released to the public?

Can he pardon himself and/or Bush proactively?

Just trying to think like they do...

[dEMOK]

96. Don't Put Anything Past...

...this nest of vipers.