Reply #14: Lots of people get married for the wrong reasons, [View All]

[SoCalDem]

so it's not a huge surprise when they get divorced later..


We have been married 34 years on March 1. Through it we have had each other to weather the storms we have gotten caught up in.. No one ever enters marriage thinking about the bad times, but they do come and they come hard , fast and they can last for years..

If people marry because they get caught up the the fancy reception, the gifts, the sex-anytime-you-want-it (ha!), they re in for a rude awakening..

Marriage is about the fact that I am a slob and my husband is a neatfreak, and yet he does not do much more than tsk-tsk and pick up in my wake..

Marriage is about the fact that I have NO PLACE for MY stuff, but I overlook the fact that my bonus room will be the "roundhouse" for his American Flyer trains, and my car will never see the inside of a garage because he has more tools than Sears Roebuck..

Marriage is about the fact that when I was a basketcase for MONTHS after our first child was born with serious birth defects, HE was the one who held me together, even though it was just as hard for him..

Marriage is about the fact that he always took MY side when his obnoxious mother criticized me..

Marriage is about the fact that now that he has health issues, I never mention the state of the yard, or the million other things he used to be able to do, but now cannot.

Marriage is about the fact that we never did get rich, like we had hoped, but we don't really mind..


anyway..

marriage is about putting someone ahead of yourself, and sharing..bad AND good.. I see so many people getting married because they can't think of anything better to do. Lots go into it with the idea that marrying someone else will "fix" what is wrong with them.. It never does..

as to alimony..that's not the norm anymore, but child support IS.and should be.. It took two parents to make that child, and both should provide for the child..

Lots of friends have had divorces, and as an outsider lookiing in, I cannot say that most of them were any happier afterwards than they were before..