In keeping with the spirit of the times: I Propose we Outlaw Sex [View All]

[Sandpiper]

In Consideration of the following:


Many Americans find sex embarassing

Many Americans find sex offensive

Gay people have sex

People get naked when they have sex and nudity is offensive

Sex is something that people don't want children to know about

Sex is the root cause of all abortions


I hereby propose a constitutional amendment banning all acts of sexual intercourse, including masturbation.

I further propose that from now on, all Americans must bathe or shower in the dark, as the sight of a naked human body is offensive to many people, and too often leads to thoughts of sex.